****
Scripture from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise**** ****Music links and
reference pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ are free for public consumption**** (Disclosure – I am grammatically incorrect most any
day these words flow as a release of this mind maze which gives me my sanity
not to impress the critics or English majors (said with much love and respect)
====================================================
Date: 11/30/2019 Saturday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
https://youtu.be/jQotFpuIK0o “Fools Gold” @Cochren $ Co
https://youtu.be/l-jpc1pU-_w “Dying To Self” @Francis Chan
(Crazy Love)
Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):
Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):
==== 2 Peter 3:10-11 (NIV) ==== But the day of the Lord will come like a thief. The heavens will disappear with a roar; the elements will be destroyed by fire, and the earth and everything done in it will be laid bare. Since everything will be destroyed in this way, what kind of people ought you to be? You ought to live holy and godly lives
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Psalm 32:8(NIV) ==== 8 I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go;
I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.
==== Luke 10:41-42=== (NIV) 41 “Martha, Martha,” the Lord
answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, 42 but few things are needed—or
indeed only one.[a] Mary has chosen what is better, and
it will not be taken away from her.”
==== Philippians 3:20-21=== (NIV) 20 But our citizenship is in
heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, 21 who, by the power that enables
him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so
that they will be like his glorious body.
==== Romans 12:5=== (NIV) 5 so in Christ we, though many,
form one body, and each member belongs to all the others.
Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Thank you, Lord, for this day and all the yesterdays before!
Thank you for each and every connection you have allowed me in this journey. For the love and grace, you have shown me to me; or through others. Thank you for the lessons I sometimes missed until after the fact.
Thank you for all of
it during these 21,028 days I have been allowed to exist here in this world.
Something about numbers even though I am a finance major’s worse nightmare. As I sit with a smile thinking of my pre walking days with you Jesus.
How I would cut up with my friends; how I could be out having fun with my girlfriends and one of them would think someone was cute; and how I could go up and get their phone number for them and the next day still remember the number and pass it on.
How carefree and simple those days were when I did just let go and have innocent fun.
Wondering at what point during this journey I became so much of a Martha, thinking I had to have everything worked out, that everything mattered; everything had a time and place and place in time.
All those times I would well up with anxiety worrying about what really doesn’t matter.
How I once entertained every holiday at my house even when we had nothing. Before anyone came the house had to be spotless; from scrubbing the floors to making that big impression with how much I loved to cook and feed everyone.
How when things even the slightest were starting to go wrong; I would get derailed from just being relaxed and enjoying the comforts to problem solving mode.
Time and numbers! What makes up that dash in between the day you allow us in this world and that date stamp out.
Thank you, Lord, for all of it.
As I am still purposing to grow forward in you and still having those days where I spend far too much time trying to resolve what is not mine to hold on to.
Please forgive me for bundling my own fears and mistakes with all I come to know; into one bucket.
As I beat myself down; because I after all this time should truly have it together; yet still stumble over my own words, feet and sometimes air.
Forgive me for knowing what really hurts is when people cannot be real; and they take pieces of you; pieces of me over time. Almost like a river wild, when one washes up on the bank all of sudden the wall that holds it back has ten more like the first.
Where you see what you want to see; hear what you want to hear and open yourself up for what you want to feel. Who will ever know if out of the mess piled high on that bank anyone of that what washes up is the true diamond? For it all just starts blending together making a mess to clean up.
You miss the shine and light that was feeding your spirit that was there one day; then gone the next; while all the other junk just keeps trying to get your attention.
All you can do is become annoyed and try to wipe it all away; while going back into problem solving mode on how to clean up and erase it forever.
Knowing that every single second of any part of the journey has meaning.
It is not about you or me; as it was not about Mary as Martha in her misunderstanding and frustrations. During the time Mary sat at Jesus feet; and Martha scurried around thinking she was doing what is right.
None of it matters; just in the days I would scrub all the floors before company came in; okay yes, I was a little OCD then. I scrubbed my floors almost every other day. But to scrub them in a snowstorm, knowing company would be messing them up as they came in the door. Well you get my point hopefully. None of it mattered; as I would need to scrub them all over once company left.
What matters is that in all my weird anxious misguided ways; and tons of mistakes then and even now. Jesus matters and never gives up on us.
Sort of like something I read it is about coming together and I am beyond grateful I live in a place where although the world is getting darker around us. And we break over and over for the loss of what we believe matters.
Coming together in and with Jesus and sitting at His spiritual feet; knowing who He is; and who Father God is; knowing the love, mercy and grace we are given each day we are allowed up in this world. That is what matters.
Not that of those who try to connect with us and do not know how to be true to themselves; so, they cannot be true even with words to our own being.
No expectations; no agenda friends. Do not try to find them; learn to be one. Learn to love right where you are; for who you will never really know they are.
Just know that every soul on this planet was created by the same God; and that the same Jesus that hung on that cross died for them as He died for me.
Learn to ask forgiveness; for those you know or those who really did connect with you. Come together in spirit and truth and leave all the rest to God.
Coming together in person or spirit is not just words or wasted time.
“Even in the secular field, singing together is considered exhilarating and transformative, and when done long enough, can actually change the networking of your brain. Our time of musical response isn’t just for entertainment value, but the power of our words to song was a special detail designed by God” @bible.com (one of the reading plans)
Each connection we make; even if for a moment in time; or those that have been with you for years. Even if you rarely get an up-close glimpse the light still shines bright for who they are in Christ. It should never be about what we do; although if we stopped putting boundaries up for all those who do things that are not clean or with purpose to add to and all they do is harm and take away. Well this world would be far darker than it is. So yes, we must purpose to be a light and stay surrounded in what shines on and not takes away.
But we must be led by Jesus and to do that we must connect with him daily; 24/7. Right where we are any time any place. Through prayer; through reading; through music; through the tools we are given; internet, nature.
Yes, those are some that just come to mind and feed me. But God is everywhere not limited to what sparks the peace in love in me. God can never be put in a box! Know that; just as I no matter how hard I try cannot resolve that what toils and twists me up from the inside out.
Just as I have said I wish I could hate people sometimes for all the wrong they do in this world. I can only hate the sadness and losses from the dirty or misfortunate things some actions of others bring.
Do I wish I could disappear from the trials and darkness that I or my family has been impacted by in this journey? Absolutely, I would be lying if I said something different. Even long before I walked with God. I would cringe at somethings that I never understood.
I have been blessed and ordained to be called to the feet of Jesus. No matter what I feel for myself; that I will never be good enough or hold significance in this world. Or maybe even to know anything more than being collateral damage and fall out from those who went before me.
Broken, used and tossed aside forgotten about. I mattered enough to Jesus; that even after all my misguided choices; damage, hurts, habits and hang-ups. He called me out of the dark and shows me daily love from the inside out.
Teaching me every step of the way; He alone is in control, and He alone holds the future of all this universe has to give.
We are never alone; and though the sun doesn’t always shine; His light does! Though we feel and know the pain and sorrow that has us crumble and never want to get back up. He holds his hand out to show us, He has taken everything to the cross with Him; and to get back up.
Thankful even if many will never understand. Thankful I have been chosen.
My dreams may be insignificant; my problems and losses of this world larger than life. My God is what gets me up every day and ensures me; through the anxiety I need not worry. It will be alright. I am not a fame chaser; the only gold I need is that which line the streets of heaven.
To be able to love in honor, in truth; that is what matters. If I must wait until I reach my final destiny so be it. And I have no shame in that or pride. It is what it is. But, for what I have been given; what has filled me up; what perhaps I allow in the depths of this soul to forever hide.
It is all worth it; knowing Jesus has me, top to bottom and side to side.
Forgive me Father for my foolish thoughts of resolve; my foolish pride. Forgive me for any thing harmful; words, actions or lack of. For those you bless me with even for a minute in time.
Please guard my heart, guide my steps and hold this tongue of mine. Please reflect in all I come to know your perfect light and design.
Thank you for this day; and all my yesterdays. May your truth forever shine!
Something about numbers even though I am a finance major’s worse nightmare. As I sit with a smile thinking of my pre walking days with you Jesus.
How I would cut up with my friends; how I could be out having fun with my girlfriends and one of them would think someone was cute; and how I could go up and get their phone number for them and the next day still remember the number and pass it on.
How carefree and simple those days were when I did just let go and have innocent fun.
Wondering at what point during this journey I became so much of a Martha, thinking I had to have everything worked out, that everything mattered; everything had a time and place and place in time.
All those times I would well up with anxiety worrying about what really doesn’t matter.
How I once entertained every holiday at my house even when we had nothing. Before anyone came the house had to be spotless; from scrubbing the floors to making that big impression with how much I loved to cook and feed everyone.
How when things even the slightest were starting to go wrong; I would get derailed from just being relaxed and enjoying the comforts to problem solving mode.
Time and numbers! What makes up that dash in between the day you allow us in this world and that date stamp out.
Thank you, Lord, for all of it.
As I am still purposing to grow forward in you and still having those days where I spend far too much time trying to resolve what is not mine to hold on to.
Please forgive me for bundling my own fears and mistakes with all I come to know; into one bucket.
As I beat myself down; because I after all this time should truly have it together; yet still stumble over my own words, feet and sometimes air.
Forgive me for knowing what really hurts is when people cannot be real; and they take pieces of you; pieces of me over time. Almost like a river wild, when one washes up on the bank all of sudden the wall that holds it back has ten more like the first.
Where you see what you want to see; hear what you want to hear and open yourself up for what you want to feel. Who will ever know if out of the mess piled high on that bank anyone of that what washes up is the true diamond? For it all just starts blending together making a mess to clean up.
You miss the shine and light that was feeding your spirit that was there one day; then gone the next; while all the other junk just keeps trying to get your attention.
All you can do is become annoyed and try to wipe it all away; while going back into problem solving mode on how to clean up and erase it forever.
Knowing that every single second of any part of the journey has meaning.
It is not about you or me; as it was not about Mary as Martha in her misunderstanding and frustrations. During the time Mary sat at Jesus feet; and Martha scurried around thinking she was doing what is right.
None of it matters; just in the days I would scrub all the floors before company came in; okay yes, I was a little OCD then. I scrubbed my floors almost every other day. But to scrub them in a snowstorm, knowing company would be messing them up as they came in the door. Well you get my point hopefully. None of it mattered; as I would need to scrub them all over once company left.
What matters is that in all my weird anxious misguided ways; and tons of mistakes then and even now. Jesus matters and never gives up on us.
Sort of like something I read it is about coming together and I am beyond grateful I live in a place where although the world is getting darker around us. And we break over and over for the loss of what we believe matters.
Coming together in and with Jesus and sitting at His spiritual feet; knowing who He is; and who Father God is; knowing the love, mercy and grace we are given each day we are allowed up in this world. That is what matters.
Not that of those who try to connect with us and do not know how to be true to themselves; so, they cannot be true even with words to our own being.
No expectations; no agenda friends. Do not try to find them; learn to be one. Learn to love right where you are; for who you will never really know they are.
Just know that every soul on this planet was created by the same God; and that the same Jesus that hung on that cross died for them as He died for me.
Learn to ask forgiveness; for those you know or those who really did connect with you. Come together in spirit and truth and leave all the rest to God.
Coming together in person or spirit is not just words or wasted time.
“Even in the secular field, singing together is considered exhilarating and transformative, and when done long enough, can actually change the networking of your brain. Our time of musical response isn’t just for entertainment value, but the power of our words to song was a special detail designed by God” @bible.com (one of the reading plans)
Each connection we make; even if for a moment in time; or those that have been with you for years. Even if you rarely get an up-close glimpse the light still shines bright for who they are in Christ. It should never be about what we do; although if we stopped putting boundaries up for all those who do things that are not clean or with purpose to add to and all they do is harm and take away. Well this world would be far darker than it is. So yes, we must purpose to be a light and stay surrounded in what shines on and not takes away.
But we must be led by Jesus and to do that we must connect with him daily; 24/7. Right where we are any time any place. Through prayer; through reading; through music; through the tools we are given; internet, nature.
Yes, those are some that just come to mind and feed me. But God is everywhere not limited to what sparks the peace in love in me. God can never be put in a box! Know that; just as I no matter how hard I try cannot resolve that what toils and twists me up from the inside out.
Just as I have said I wish I could hate people sometimes for all the wrong they do in this world. I can only hate the sadness and losses from the dirty or misfortunate things some actions of others bring.
Do I wish I could disappear from the trials and darkness that I or my family has been impacted by in this journey? Absolutely, I would be lying if I said something different. Even long before I walked with God. I would cringe at somethings that I never understood.
I have been blessed and ordained to be called to the feet of Jesus. No matter what I feel for myself; that I will never be good enough or hold significance in this world. Or maybe even to know anything more than being collateral damage and fall out from those who went before me.
Broken, used and tossed aside forgotten about. I mattered enough to Jesus; that even after all my misguided choices; damage, hurts, habits and hang-ups. He called me out of the dark and shows me daily love from the inside out.
Teaching me every step of the way; He alone is in control, and He alone holds the future of all this universe has to give.
We are never alone; and though the sun doesn’t always shine; His light does! Though we feel and know the pain and sorrow that has us crumble and never want to get back up. He holds his hand out to show us, He has taken everything to the cross with Him; and to get back up.
Thankful even if many will never understand. Thankful I have been chosen.
My dreams may be insignificant; my problems and losses of this world larger than life. My God is what gets me up every day and ensures me; through the anxiety I need not worry. It will be alright. I am not a fame chaser; the only gold I need is that which line the streets of heaven.
To be able to love in honor, in truth; that is what matters. If I must wait until I reach my final destiny so be it. And I have no shame in that or pride. It is what it is. But, for what I have been given; what has filled me up; what perhaps I allow in the depths of this soul to forever hide.
It is all worth it; knowing Jesus has me, top to bottom and side to side.
Forgive me Father for my foolish thoughts of resolve; my foolish pride. Forgive me for any thing harmful; words, actions or lack of. For those you bless me with even for a minute in time.
Please guard my heart, guide my steps and hold this tongue of mine. Please reflect in all I come to know your perfect light and design.
Thank you for this day; and all my yesterdays. May your truth forever shine!
Weekend Services: @New Life Christian Church 11/30/2019 6pm Saturday Services God Ruler of Time and Space
https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2600081080084372/
====================================================
Date: 11/29/2019 Friday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
==== Psalm 136:1,26 (NIV) ==== 1 Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good.
His love endures forever. 26 Give thanks to the God of heaven. His love endures forever.
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Isaiah 58:11(NIV) ==== 11 The Lord
will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and
will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like
a spring whose waters never fail.
==== Isaiah 40:11=== (NIV) 11 He tends his flock like a
shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart;
he gently leads those that have young
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Just why I will never fully understand and honestly over the years stopped trying to figure out.
However, when you are laying away in the middle of the night pitch black in silence all around and the words flood you. When you have only had words your entire being. You capture what is trying to come out.
Unlike those moments when your mind just is like the Indy 500 in the middle of a smash up derby all at once. We all have things, gifts, wires that fire and shoot out sometimes good sometimes bad, and many times all that we do not understand.
Fighting the battle soon I will need to again become invisible and store all this away. I am who I am; and blessed beyond all that is or is not. But trying to gain my momentum back. Digging in and really trying to understand who, what or why I am right here and right now.
For more than stability for littles; or taking up space and going through the motions. Cleaning up, reorganizing; really trying to understand what it is in Christ I am to be. Although my writing is my sanity; to really understand; we need to disappear back into the desert and let life be.
I am not sure when; but to regain and just breathe I must find the remaining shattered pieces this heart this soul leaked recently. Here we are coming to the end of 2019. Not sure how much there is left I will just have to wait for 2020.
Anyway, this riddled mind maze so put together; yet broken bits. So full of love I know that is forever God’s gift. I learned to live I learned to forgive.
But I cannot shake the deep inside that will not stop twisting.
One thing is for sure; is when the words come; be it now or in the dark of the night. Here they are. To write, to read; to share with! No rhyme or reason; just words coming out for me is a gift.
Never hide the tears of hurt pain or of sorrows (@AlwaysMeKelly)
The daggers that cut through your heart are real; no matter of deceit being used up, harmed or when someone dear has been taken and died. That which flows down your cheek each time you cry. From the soul, deep within.
They matter most as God understands and knows just who and where you are.
Those scars sometimes leaving so much pain you cannot pick up and start back what you once were motivated for.
Just remember you are not alone even when it means nothing to many and even at times we just do not understand; those words to know there is a reason and God has so much more in store; He has a great plan.
Some have many some have few. Some handle those cuts of loss by giving up.
Others Fighting forward in Christ numb, broken no explanation it’s just something they do.
There is no greater love or peace than that of Jesus; which is an unexplainably truth.
Here on earth sometimes is to try to justify why one does what they do.
Does it really even matter? Justifying trying to find the reasons; really changes nothing. Or does it change everything? Does it destroy our belief or fill us with so much compassion we have pity on humanity?
Hurting with those you love; matters however, unless we really choose and allow change to work through our own being. We will forever be entangled; broken unable to move forward. Does not matter if it is me or you.
The pain never stops, those daggers in our hearts. Somehow eventually it got easier for me; when your losses have come like rain all your life; it is so much different from that very first time.
Remember I have not always been Christ Bride; I finally found him in 1995.
Truth is; somethings will never go away.
It is absolutely okay to cry.
It is a struggle daily just to try; just even growing closer to God if I’m being honest, really.
It is hard I will not lie.
Nevertheless, never forget He has the answers of who and why.
He has strength that keeps getting you back up.
During all you want to believe; and the world reflects nothing but lies.
When you just want to crawl up in a ball never moving again just lying there waiting die.
Why am I writing these words in the middle of the night?
Perhaps God uses those who have been used up suffered loss; tossed out their entire life.
Just to remind us there is no shame in love or need hope; for the peace so eternal no matter what is; as we cling to Jesus Christ. Not some worldly ghost.
There Will always be takers, thieves in the night.
There will always be someone breaks our heart when we cannot shake them forever knowing it was okay but too far out of sight.
Gods plans is sending you somewhere else; through the valleys for his own visions in sight. How we handle it or what we choose. Well the choices are our own for me or you. Right or wrong filled up or emptied on the ground. Nasty words; broken spirit; nothing we have will do. It is Jesus we must never let go; we must cling to.
God allows those who are lost to be found; He allows the beauty of shattered pieces to be put back together even when the abstract we become are just simply colors of his mosaic canvas.
God gives and takes away, no matter who, no matter what; no matter what time night or day.
The war is already won; even when we find ourselves lost on this physical worldly battle ground.
It is through Him the flowers blossom in the desert dried. It is He alone who dries the tears we cry. It is He alone he brings us down to self; reflecting what we are really made of for His kingdom; not something to pick or choose and be put on a shelf.
For the power and glory are His alone. We may be filled with all that is temporary or even that abundant love.
Our choices must be wisely for all that is above. Not what others think here on the ground; for what was lost; or what is found. For a love in Christ; is no greater love or peace to be found.
============================
Date: 11/28/2019 Thursday (Happy Thanksgiving 2019)
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
https://youtu.be/zfLcdBuB7NY “Here Again” @Elevation Worship
Verse of the
Day (Biblegateway.com):
==== 1 Chronicles 16:8 (NIV) ====
Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name; make known among the nations what he has done.
==== 1 Chronicles 16:8 (MSG) ====
Thank God! Call out his Name! Tell the whole world who he is and what he’s done! Sing to him! Play songs for him! Broadcast all his wonders! Revel in his holy Name, God-seekers, be jubilant! Study God and his strength, seek his presence day and night; Remember all the wonders he performed, the miracles and judgments that came out of his mouth. Seed of Israel his servant! Children of Jacob, his first choice! He is God, our God; wherever you go you come on his judgments and decisions. He keeps his commitments across thousands of generations, the covenant he commanded, The same one he made with Abraham, the very one he swore to Isaac; He posted it in big block letters to Jacob, this eternal covenant with Israel: “I give you the land of Canaan, this is your inheritance; Even though you’re not much to look at, a few straggling strangers.”
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Happy Thanksgiving Lord I am grateful for this day and the other 331 days you have allowed me up this year alone.
As these thoughts start to flow before even getting into my mediation moments. Jesus as cheesy as this sounds. I may not really know much about the world and have been blessed beyond all deserving.
I may never know much of anything; or I may have knowledge about many little things. What comes to mind as an absolute is “I don’t know Much” but Jesus I know I love you https://youtu.be/MODa6wpbKok @Aaron Neville and Linda Ronstadt
I may never really understand; and that may be all I need to know. For no matter what I say about feeling. Thank you, God, for loving me from the inside out, never giving up on me and allowing me to love you with and through your son Jesus. Thank you
My life is not that I do not want to feel; I am who I am and long before ever being blessed by you Jesus; well I always wore my heart on my sleeve.
It is the feeling that comes from caring too much about those who cannot care about themselves much less anyone else.
When those who are seeking whatever they can take and see people that care too much a mile away and find their way to do so.
Even those we entangle ourselves with; believing in all they can be. Only later to be crushed in spirit and yes even sometimes our journey’s real physical life as well. No matter what the reason, just knowing the world truly has a hold on them when we know you have some much more for them and you will never be done.
Never did I plan to be here and now! Never did I plan to be one who came to care about anyone but more importantly need you so much Jesus.
Never did I plan to be the one who wakes in the night or finds myself during my days praying; or even the fact prayer and you Jesus would even be a part of any of my thoughts.
Thank you for all of it Father God!
Truly no matter what I am blessed beyond any memory, hurt, habit or hang-up. Pet peeves that others trigger annoyance or even sometimes that warmth of joy and sadness allowing my soul to leak out.
I deserve nothing in this life; but you Lord has blessed me. Blessed another day to do my best as I get up and know without you; none of this will ever matter.
So, as I am getting up and around; drinking my morning coffee and yes eating a slice of apple pie for breakfast. Thank you! As I start thankfully fidgeting around in the kitchen and pulling together a meal. Thankful for the memories from when I use to have my children running and creating chaos through the house. Family coming over and just people stopping by and visiting.
I am thankful to know; no matter what is prepared today; no matter who stops by; no matter if I only get to see or speak with family five minutes on technology. Thankful for those moments struggling not knowing how things would ever turn out; to years later knowing it was always you that allowed this life.
I am thankful and blessed beyond all deserving to have even come this far. Thank you for loving me Jesus; and thank you for allowing me to love others. Thankful that you fill my cup up; and convinced me to let go of what was and live thankful for the here and now. https://youtu.be/x1BA_jCHXP0 “Overflow” @TobyMac, Bart Millard (Willyecho Remix/Audio
No matter what it turns out in the end; I am held by you. Thank you for allowing me to recognize where my blessings come from daily.
May I never stop believing and hoping in you and that you alone will handle all the wrong doings of this world. May my spirit be released to you alone Jesus and all that I am connected be covered in your mercy and grace. https://youtu.be/0w4Pa6Cu4Pc “ABOVE INSPIRATION” @Tyler Perry
Lord, though I am the one who must be busy and far from perfect in all I do. May I always acknowledge you first; even if I am not the one sitting at your feet hanging on every word.
May I never take that from anyone who is; may I always help direct all I am connected towards you and your will alone. For anyone who does not know the story of Martha and Mary I reference; it can be found in ====Luke 10:38-42====
Thank you, Lord, for the privileges not only to have a life, but for all the blessings and lessons you have allowed me throughout this journey.
Thank you for allowing me to pull back up and survive and live with what I am allowed every moment of every day. Even if I do not do things right or miss what really should be done. You alone have never given up on your children. You alone allow me breath here and now; and when it stops, I know I will be with you on the other side.
For this I am eternally grateful.
Please be with all I am connected Jesus; healing the mind, body and soul brokenness we carry around. Forgetting we are never alone. Never understanding and some never coming to terms and actually coming to you.
Jesus may your will and love wash over all I am connected as it has me over the years, I have come to you. May all realize it is not about a building. Yes, we surround ourselves up with like believers who love and fear you. But the relationship with you Father God; starts between our individual selves and you right where we are.
Once we are with you daily; we without even notice just start surrounding ourselves with fellow brothers and sisters in you.
We want more and more of you and find the best way to be fed is to find a good bible-based church that true believers who are made up from imperfect broken people as ourselves. Seek you as the goal and help each other grow.
We learn what is labeled obedience and doing what is right. Starts coming easier without even a second thought once we have finally truly given ourselves to you.
And yes, the world is so hard trying to stay on track as we are surrounded with more and more not of you because we must survive and still live in the flesh. We find ourselves stumbling, face planting and even sometimes. Being part of things that hurt and can-do damage to others and ourselves.
But not for one second of any day; do you ever turn your back on those who truly love and fear you Jesus; you are with us through all our joy and suffering.
Thank you.
There are no fancy words or theologian sermons. You are who you were and are proclaimed to be then, now and forever into eternity! Nothing I can say, share or even do can prove that to anyone. We all get to that place of choice in our own time. Along the way we allow our hearts to break and sometimes come close to destruction.
You alone allow us choice to call upon you Jesus and walk through this life into the next with or without you.
I pray forgiveness for all who have negatively harmed me and my spirit; and for all to find forgiveness towards others including anything I may have done impacting them.
Jesus may it be you alone that guide and lead us; in love through your mercy and grace. Much love and prayers for all I am connected. My choice through and with you now and always. Thank you for this new day.
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV) ==== 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.
==== Ephesians
3:16-19=== (NIV) 16 I pray
that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his
Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ
may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and
established in love, 18 may have
power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and
high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may
be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
==== Psalms 107:21-22===
(NIV) 21 Let them give
thanks to the Lord for his
unfailing love
and his wonderful deeds for mankind. 22 Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy.
and his wonderful deeds for mankind. 22 Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of his works with songs of joy.
==================================
Date: 11/27/2019 Wednesday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
==== Colossians 3:16 (NIV) ==== Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Colossians 3:15 (NIV) ==== 15 Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful.
==== Acts 9:18=== (NIV) 18 Immediately, something like
scales fell from Saul’s eyes, and he could see again. He got up and was
baptized,
==== Revelation 19:3-6=== (NIV) 3 And again they shouted:
“Hallelujah!
The smoke from her goes up for ever and ever.” 4 The twenty-four elders and the four living creatures fell down and worshiped God, who was seated on the throne. And they cried:
The smoke from her goes up for ever and ever.” 4 The twenty-four elders and the four living creatures fell down and worshiped God, who was seated on the throne. And they cried:
“Amen, Hallelujah!” 5 Then a voice came from the throne,
saying: “Praise our God, all you his servants, you who fear him, both
great and small!” 6 Then I heard what sounded like a great
multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder,
shouting: “Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns.
==== Psalm 100:4-5=== (NIV 4 Enter his gates with
thanksgiving
and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.
5 For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.
and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.
5 For the Lord is good and his love endures forever; his faithfulness continues through all generations.
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
There will never be enough thanks I can give to you Lord God; for allowing me up each day and allowing options, opportunities and blessings.
Darkness is everywhere and nowhere! We have been blessed to choose to stay within all that tries to daily consume us; or pull up and out into the lighted path you shine brightly for all to find.
No matter what I or my family, friends, connections go through. There is choice to bury ourselves allowing the darkness to win; or getting back up one more time you open our eyes and allow us air in the lungs we need to breathe.
So many times, I want to just quit; grown weary a very long time ago. Giving up somedays more than others and not even really knowing what I give up.
My faith, my hope, all that I have chosen to allow to transpire in this life; walk away and become the nobody alone allowing the darkness that I have been blessed so long ago to be saved from; to consume what little I am. What must I give up; for I am already invisible!
How does that even work; knowing there is never the opportunity to climb up on the fence and believe in you Jesus; while giving up and just not dealing with what this life is. That just does not and will not ever be an opportunity. Live for the world or live for you; there is no in-between.
We all have choices; and never is it written anywhere that this life would be full of joy, happiness and lots of love surrounding us with all the family, friends and never a problem or mistakes that will sometimes rock us to the core.
All those losses; all that faith and hope we put into others to see so many who are broken and weary. For when I think, and I know I cannot be alone; but we purpose along thinking we do for the greater good only to be caught up in what turns out to be nothing but impacts everything. Leaving us to feel set us back and derailed and questioning all we believe in humanity.
Thankfully you Jesus are the one truth and source of life that is forever steadfast and abundant.
As for our troubles well ====2 Corinthians 4:17=== (NIV) 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory for that far outweighs them all.
I have to believe all that is written and all that has come to pass has purpose and meaning; even when life seems broken, unfair, never making any sense.
Despite my own best efforts of letting go of me because of all my own failures; you Jesus sustain me; just keep showing up and making me find me all over again. You pulled me from the woods, and darkness, from the many almost really should have been moments. You are the one that allows me just enough to remember; but not enough to really give up that last time. You are the one that keeps me with a pure heart and clean hands; when I could have been that statistic.
You, Jesus allow me up and moving; when all the broken promises, broken bones, broken plans no matter the reasons. Just all should have been the end. https://youtu.be/BhasSpSBdEE “Ever Be” @ Bethel (-kalley | We Will Not Be Shaken)
I have to believe in you alone Lord; as you hold me, you also hold the blood of my blood and all others I am connected; in your hands and have a greater plan. Plans I may never see; but must keep praying and allowing what will be will be.
I am thankful, even on the days that feel as if they come up empty.
It is you; and I am beyond blessed for all the gifts of sight, sound, touch you have allowed me through others to experience your canvas full of mercy and grace.
Blessed that you have allowed me to taste what it means to love from the inside out. Especially in this world where so many make life hard to remain lovable.
Life will never be full of that rose scented garden; how we appreciate it when we do have the opportunities forever make the difference as we walk through the valleys of cactus.
At some point we all bleed out for the thorns of live we brush up on or truly get slammed into. Falling down when those we love are lost or taken; when at the hands of so much unknown tests and shatters pieces of us. Leaving us to think we will never recover.
Yet, we get up day after day; readjusting to the new normal. Trying to remain positive along the way; can only take place when we hold on to the greater good.
The facts that you Father God; came down and gave your life; your Son Jesus Christ to take all that we will never deserve or understand to the cross. Allowing us to have choices and fight to grow forward in you.
Babble most of the time to some I am sure. But Lord all Nations, tongues and tribes. God of the universe and father to the orphans no matter how they ended there.
You are the truth, the life and light the only way.
I will not get my days right half the time; nor will I be that beautiful super model the earth chases after. The riches I have are all I have in you and the beauty that you allow me to see through your canvas on this journey.
I am loved even when I feel insignificant because just once in this physical world did, I too chase to feel wanted, and loved as you love; by your chosen. Even when I come up short or forget to look up.
Life in this world is what it is until it is not. Prayers and wishes my own and all I learn and know; are blessed to have their hearts softened and directed to you Jesus.
Erasing the foul mouth garbage that spews at times; from angry hurting souls that just refuse to believe. Those that cannot get out of their own way and those who think life is just a big game to play.
Lord, if only we all knew daily, minute by minute just how blessed we are. If only we all were thankful right where we are. No matter what.
Someday may or may never come; our choices are our own and we can choose to chase the material items of people, places and things in this world and make them what our life is. So that when we give ourselves away so freely and things fall apart, we just fall apart with it.
Or we can choose to dig in and continually learn and grow forward towards eternity. None of us really know what those streets of gold will really look like until we get there.
But those who believe and hold on to you Jesus; knowing we are far from perfect here and now; can and will be redeemed with you. If we choose to never give up.
Maybe, it is just me; for I am surrounded daily by so many who do not walk towards and with you. Periodically allowed to serve and be nourished by my brothers and sisters in your kingdom. Thank you for all of them! Thank you for those who hold me accountable and help me grow! Thank you for those who give all for you even when they too are broken! Thank you, Jesus, for the greatest love story I will ever know! Thank you for this imperfect life and need for you every second of every day!
Please be with all who are within this heart of mine. Please forgive me for when I hold on too long for letting myself down with the choices made. Forgive me when I add to the darkness of those who really need your light. Please guide my steps, guard my heart and continue to allow my words to be silenced when the world gets to be too much and I feel the daggers and cuts of those and their heartless actions, words or deeds.
I pray I never become that one to justify and retaliate towards other actions. I pray for the safety and love always in you alone. https://youtu.be/gMixnWehee0 “In Christ Alone” @Kristian Stanfill
Thank you for another day given. May all I do be pleasing to you alone!
==========================================
Date: 11/26/2019 Tuesday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
https://youtu.be/tHeIN1qIE7s?list=PL60DEC501ED294D54 “Lift up Your Face” @Third Day-MOVE
Verse of the
Day (Biblegateway.com):
==== Hebrews 12:28 (NIV) ==== Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably with reverence and awe,
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Psalm 118:24 (NIV) ==== 24 The Lord has done it this very day; let us rejoice today and be
glad.
==== Psalm 116:17=== (NIV) 17 I
will sacrifice a thank offering to you and call on the name of the Lord.
==== 2 Corinthians 12:9=== (NIV) 9 But
he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in
weakness.” Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so
that Christ’s power may rest on me.
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
THANK YOU!
Cruising with Kelly 11/26/2019
==========================================
Date: 11/25/2019 Monday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
https://youtu.be/H0cJ3RmnXmY “Here Comes Heaven” @Elevation Worship
Verse of the
Day (Biblegateway.com):
==== Colossians 3:17 (NIV) ==== And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 (NKJV) ==== 16 Rejoice
always, 17 pray without ceasing, 18 in
everything give thanks; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.
==== James 4:8=== (NIV) 8 Come
near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and
purify your hearts, you double-minded.
==== Romans 15:13=== (NIV) 13 May
the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that
you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Thank you, Lord, for another
day to find opportunities in this life ride.
Thank you, even though I
could not sleep last night, and you had words swirling. Thank you for
unplanned mind dumps and messages to share. (No Matter What) thank
you!
Cruising with Kelly 11/25/2019 https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2587672517991895/
https://youtu.be/cDshdJK9Rwg “Only God Knows Why” @Kid Rock
https://youtu.be/KW_ZAMrlVfk “Make You Feel My Love” @Terrian (cover)
Reimage
(@AlwaysMeKelly)
When God allows love to flow through your veins no matter what the reasons you are running from it or running to it; no matter what direction North or South, East or West
Only God can control what next!
Like some old movie, that love that just stays deep within our bones our souls and over time in passing moments when we are reminded by the sound of a song, warmth of a smile, flash of the wind blowing; it (that love) never goes Away.
You look at your life and can count the number of saves; God’s Grace gave you.
No matter for when or what this journey has taken you through; or even where you were doing your best trying to lead by example stepping up, stepping out but during the process you allowed yourself too close and cared. Too close, to what reflected so much beauty and talent within that soul yet they could just never see their own worth. Here you thought your mission was to save them; all the while, they were giving you purpose and drive to save yourself.
In the end even realizing the lessons the journey, the experience led you through was full of Gods, love mercy and grace that will forever stick to you.
So very grateful for God’s love in the wind
So beyond blessed no words can describe I do not know where to begin.
Somewhere over that rainbow, I too will get to go
For now, holding on tight in obedience that moral compass and stop giving up the world and letting yourself go.
Reimage your thoughts your mind your being not just now but forever in time
God has already chosen you long ago before you knew words, or rhymes.
He gives and takes away. Nothing is a season we all just have our reasons no matter good or bad yours or mine.
Just business the greatest hustle of all; cost us far more that will never be forgotten especially when the curtain of life finally falls.
You choose to ignore the warnings signs.
You choose to even know that God always does win! This is his world and is He is the one and only great Devine.
Reimage your past reimage your future.
Accepting who you really are is a love beyond all truth.
You are more than what they take more than what they took.
Learn now to guard your heart your life.
For it is the one and only and never be just be words we say or write; it is not just, what is on the outside, the cover or a page in this world’s book we call life. It is more than just a passing glance; more than survival. It is digging deep; taking a long look. Knowing you are worth more than what this world has taken or even what you took.
Find who God is through His son Jesus Christ.
Not just the words everyone talks about how no matter how true. God is Love!
Yes, God is love and he has showed you from the inside out.
I may never make sense for what I say or what I write; in this crazy world, with foolish rhymes or how these words day after day dumping out this heart and mind.
We All will always be more than okay.
For everyday He gives us life come what may.
Reimage your thoughts, no matter what you are paying as a price
Do your best shining brighter, beyond the dreams in our hearts or the visions of our eyes; or even that what anyone will say. Always know whose you are; or no matter what can or cannot transpire on any given day.
Perspective is everything; Control is an illusion and God is eternal waiting on you.
Always do your best; to do what is right no matter what the circumstances.
Transform your mind, and all you do; for God is patiently waiting for you to Re Image where he can shine through.
=========================================================
Date: 11/24/2019 Sunday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
https://youtu.be/sVN-E1DLIoo “This Is A Move” @Brandon Lake & Tasha Cobbs
Verse of the
Day (Biblegateway.com):
==== Colossians 2:6-7 (NIV) ====
[Spiritual Fullness in Christ] So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live your lives in him, rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Ephesians 5:20 (NIV) ==== 20 always giving thanks to God the Father for
everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.
==== Psalm 118:1=== (NIV) 1 Give thanks to the Lord,
for he is good; his love endures forever.
==== Psalm 89:15 (NIV) ==== 15 Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you,
who walk in the light of your presence, Lord
who walk in the light of your presence, Lord
==== 1 John 3:16 (NIV) ==== 16 This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down
his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and
sisters.
Weekend Services: @New Life Christian Church 11/24/2019 9:45am (Book of James week 10 – Marriage Counseling 11/24/2019 welcome to new life Christian Church Sunday 9:45am service today‘s message is marriage counseling 101 out of the book of James. We do not own rights to the content we are covering with Worship, but we hope you enjoy the service
https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2585767378182409/
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Thank you, Father God, for this new day. Waking up knowing how much I need you is a blessing beyond all reasoning. I am not sure what this day will bring. As I am up and readying to go off and do what I do. Please guide me Jesus; keeping me focused and from making it about me; as it should always be about you.
Awareness is a clever tool, so often I find myself needing to reset the feelings that come to life.
Some when I make a mistake say something or look too long in one direction. Some things many take for granted; perhaps I think too much about.
Balancing life doing what we must; doing what feeds our soul when we belong to you and trying to remain humble is a challenge. Just trying to do life alone in the times when we do not awaken in you God, at your every attempt.
Despite all that transpires, Lord I truly beg that my all that I am, always flow through you now and any of my remaining days.
May the emotions that sometimes get the better of me, become all about you and not about me!
May the struggles of this world flow through your hands for guidance and direction. Not that of everyone knowing what is best. Including me.
Lord, so many are hurting and including my own blood even myself at times.
Forgive me when I get frustrated for those who do want you in their lives; yes, by their own choice; but my reaction when I am frustrated when it comes to life, choices, and stepping up and out daily.
Well sometimes, my expectations even when things are not said flow with frustration. Frustrations when those I care about are constantly hate life; but never really try to get up and out and try something new to change it. Stuck in the cycle that only they and you can break.
We all get you in our own time; or least I hope everyone at least comes to you and even if they do not stay. Everyone gets there to you, in our own timing.
Not everyone sometimes not anyone will ever get the appreciation that should be shown every second, we have breath in our lungs and can inhale.
Not everyone will be accountable and feel blessed for how we are allowed, to choose with our own free will.
Though I pray that everything that flows through me or I am connected would know and/or choose your will the best they can everyday Father God. Reality will always be so much different.
I pray father even in my off the wall mind dumps, riddled words or tapped out messages that you alone lead me to still love and seek you. When I do not see that moral compass and a passion of any, I connect with that; I learn to refocus and believe in you alone as they are out there trying for themselves.
That you have greater plans for them and not that I should not care; but remember you have all things under control.
Forgive me when I get mad because all I see is self-pity or anger over what they cannot seem to get or want when it comes to finding you.
Lord shine brightly on all I am connected; no matter what their choices. May all come to know it is never too late to choose you.
May all come to know we are never alone when we walk with you.
Thank you, Lord, for allowing me to find you; every time I forget and start making things in this life about me.
Please forgive me when I totally miss the mark of what your will is; even as I am daily walking with you.
When I am totally making something out of nothing allowing my emotions to guide me and sometimes making a mess of my own.
Lord please always show me the way back to your will no matter what.
I know you have not allowed me through this walk, for it to be anything less but with you.
May all I am, all I can be, and all I come to know. Shine brightly towards you in which we help others grow.
Please be with all those who you call chosen during the family gathering times; all those who are broken and hurting, all those who have no physical connections.
Lord please fill them up with your spirit, love, comfort and hope.
May the refuge they take always be in you; for this world is so full of obstacles and wrong opportunities?
May the refuge they find in the end only be through you?
May I never stop being desperately trying to find more of you to feed the love from you alone Jesus!
For the hunger that is so deep in my soul, may it always only reflect the blessings that you alone are Father God! That of only what Jesus Christ has and can fill or allow.
Throughout all the Joy and all the pain. May those who believe know only one name “Jesus” for me; no matter what happens in this world; may I never be ashamed.
For there is nothing the mere mortals of this planet can explain for what we think we have lost;
As we know, it is all eternal gain. Knowing the truth in you Jesus!
Knowing to do the best we can with what we get to work with, is the only right thing to do.
A love affair beyond all space and time.
Sometimes to come so close we chase to touch; or taste a love of yours to have so much; there is never anything that can replace what the soul forever holds on this ride.
Thank you for all that I am today and all those yesterdays you provide. May I never lose myself in anything ever again; that is not by your design.
Never stop praying no matter what; and know Satan will do everything he has power to do; to derail you and try to make you turn to self and walk away from God.
Never believing what is not God breathed! If you cannot confirm it, do not believe it.
Keep fighting the good fight growing forward in Him. Not self; not those here that are temporary; grasp what is eternal and anointed through the blood of Christ every second you can.
My prayers the past couple days really having God's will and not my own, to find myself in him and stop making it about me.
Even though I pray in the early morning the day transpires; sure enough, second service new technical setups mess up and because of my nature not able to deal with rejection or liking to do anything wrong; you know failing.
My entire second service overshadowed by feeling as if I am not good enough and wanting to quit.
Really! No, joke what is wrong with me even for 20 minutes; worrying about glitches in technology that I have no control. It was not about me; it was something that just happened.
In addition, as soon as I took the focus over worrying someone would think looking back in the booth as things were awry.
So stupid to think it was about me even for a split second of time.
God was back in full force for and with me. But truly where did he ever go? We are so quick to hold on to the pain points, weaknesses, failures, and making it about us. Yet the entire time God had everything just as he wanted in control.
Therefore, those hiccups; it did not stop the house to worship Him alone.
Thank you, Jesus, for every lesson you lead me; every moment in you, I have found.
=============================
11/23/2019 Saturday
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com):
Testimony in the Park with our beautiful Sister Samantha Lindsey (DEFY THE LABELS) https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2583469475078866/
Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):
==== Romans 8:38-39 (NIV) ==== 38 For I am
convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the
future, nor any powers, 39 neither height nor depth, nor
anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God
that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.
==== Psalm 4:7-8=== (NIV) 7 Fill my heart with joy when their grain and new wine abound. 8 In peace I will lie down and sleep, for you alone, Lord, make me dwell in safety.
Daily Journal/Thoughts/
Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
Thank you, Father God, for this new day. Waking up knowing how much I need you is a blessing beyond all reasoning. I am not sure what this day will bring.
As I am up and readying to go off and do what I do. Please guide me Jesus; keeping me focused and from making it about me; as it should always be about you. Awareness is a clever tool; so often I find myself needing to reset the feelings that come to life. Some when I make a mistake say something or look too long in one direction. Some things many take for granted; perhaps I think too much
Weekend Services: @New Life Christian Church 11/23/2019 6pm Saturday (Book of James week 10 – Marriage Counseling 11/23/2019 welcome to new life Christian Church Saturday night service tonight ‘s message is marriage counseling 101 out of the book of James. We do not own rights to the content we are covering with Worship but we hope you enjoy the service https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2584319878327159/
