07.Wk2_2020_July(PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)

Music pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ and are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise and are free for public consumption****   (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)

Date: 07/11/2020 Saturday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/fY6L7YMkVhA   “My Next Thirty Years” @Tim McGraw

https://youtu.be/ayPWypFcQUM “I Believe In You” @Finding Favour

 

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Jeremiah 32:17 (NIV)  
¹⁷ “Ah, Sovereign Lord, you have made the heavens and the earth by your great power and outstretched arm. Nothing is too hard for you.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thankful beyond words for another new day.   So much promise, opportunity and adventure awaiting to be had.

Keeping in mind sometimes the journey and opportunities are not as we plan and sometimes even when the world as we know it crumbles around us or seems to make no sense at all. 

Sometimes when you believed in people places or things too much only to find out they when human beings are no different than anyone else in this world; places really were not were even close as the brochure described and things well hopefully we all remember.   Things are just that and they come and go.  

No matter what the opportunity in front of you and every second we are given life is an opportunity to be alive, to speak life and to give life.

When the world, and all the spin that cycles us does break our unspoken expectations or visions.  It  does not mean life is over.

Not unless we choose to allow it to be over with whatever we do next.

Riddles maybe; Dreams maybe?

But if God allows us up another day, up another second.   We have a choice, we have a voice, we have listening ears, we have movement.

It does not matter if we move slow or like that triathlete.   It does not matter if our sight is not as good as it once was, or our hearing makes us get up and close.

We are given the opportunities to not just sit and wallow in what did I do, what have I done, what if, or worse yet I cannot because I am not good enough.

Yes, I remind myself every day as well.         As I know from history and humanity there will always be someone who knows more, looks better, makes more money, does something better.    But there will always also be you with your unique talents and beauty where you will know of something, or how to, that will help someone else.

We are all uniquely made in the image of our creator even if we all bleed the same; and all were created and made to love.    We are his chose creation and worth more than anything or anyone can give or take from us in this worldly journey.

If God allows me to get through this pandemic with whatever sanity I have left; I can assure you my goal for my next 30 years of un-promised tomorrows  will be filled to love and be loved beyond anything I have ever purposed for in my life.

 

All the yesterdays are gone and yes there will always be a special place for those who God allowed me to connect with.    All the broken tears that have fallen He has captured in his hands.    Be it dear friends and loved ones who lost their way and lost the journey here and now too soon.     Or those that I made more important and lifted higher than they ever should have been, and I laid broken on the floor of let downs and humility.

Life is what it is until it is not.     Never have I been prepared; I am sure you either for such a thing as this COVID19 Pandemic.    But here we are!

I am starving I will not lie; I have went from being socially in touch with chosen family, friends, service projects, outreach, and worship.  Yes worship!   And here I am going from 7 days a way on the move being connected, feeling helpful, hopeful to maybe getting out of my house an hour a week and extremely limited communication in person.    If at all.     Yes, we (my church family) has been blessed to have a venue where we can now come together outside and be distant while worshipping the one who gives us life.  But this is so new it has not really sunk in  yet.

So, I know as I work through this time of personal growth, strength and newness on the journey God is already aware that will be taken.

I pray that I will always have confidence to remain me;  and always take every chance to love people for who they are and never what they do.   

Yes, there are some mighty beautiful souls in this world; if your reading this I am sure you are one of them.       Sometimes some shine so bright for the gifts they were given they shine so bright we get consumed for the talent that leads us back to Christ and forget they are human too.

Riddle again yes.   I cannot explain at least not right now.

 

What I can say is I have had much in my life and lost much.  I know simple little ole me; know what it is like for people to love you for what you do, or they can get from you.

They will love you and stay connected until you cut them off from the material activities or things they can take.  Then they move on to the next.  

That itself to me sucks big time.   

 

I see the good in too many even those I have allowed hustle me when I knew they were; yet hoping they were really better than what is predicted.   As I have had the hustle and been broken by those who I would have never expected.

 

However, the cool thing about it!  Yes, there is.   I am still here today.   Blessed to know Gods faithful and he will never leave or take anything that he is not replacing with something better.   No, I am not speaking of material things.  I am talking about life itself.

What I suggest is if you do not know Jesus, you do not know God.   Meet Jesus right where you are and just hang with him every day one minute, two, ten and so on for the next thirty days. 

Make Him your best friend and allow his indescribable peace and love to wash through you and carry you.     What do you have to lose?   A few minutes of not reading blogs such as mine.   While you are reading devotionals, or the bible or watching podcasts.   The You Version bible App is cool it has many really good readings plans short and long.

 

Anyway I need to get to an appointment this morning; But this mind maze just wanted me to make sure you remember you have the choice; you have nothing to lose by tapping into Jesus and everything to gain.  And even if I am wrong what have I lost.  If anything, I have added life to my journey.    Spiritually and physically!

I am not perfect, and I stumble allot with choices, and even how I respond sometimes and especially during this lock down.

Love who you are, love others and just be kind and know God Loves you more than anything this world will give or take.

Check in on your friends, your family, your neighbors even by looking from the outside in.   Let them know they matter.

Father God I pray any tomorrows I am given are filled with your abundance and that all I am allowed to connect are blessed and are led through your perfect will. 

Even if they are not Father please hear their unspoken prayers and for those you will allow me to love for just who they are and not what they do.   Thank you!

Thank you for here and now and anything you have awaiting me.  Have mercy on my next thirty years!

 

In your precious and might name!  Wash over this land and wash us all in your will and blood. Amen

 

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

 

Exodus 20:4-5 (NIV)

⁴ “You shall not make for yourself an image in the form of anything in heaven above or on the earth beneath or in the waters below. ⁵ You shall not bow down to them or worship them; for I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me,

 

2 Samuel 22:29 (NIV)

²⁹ You, Lord, are my lamp; the Lord turns my darkness into light.

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Date: 07/10/2020 Friday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/iv_Pf7bDZj4     “Why God” @Austin French

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Philippians 1:6 (NIV)  
⁶ being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thank you, Father, for this new day.   Thank you for this last day of staycation trying to find things to do.  As the weather got in the way and changed up what was already limited.   

The best of everything from me to you; cause in the dreams I allow open doors telling us what to reach for and the lessons tell us what not to do.

 

There is no truth to being trapped in our past; what we have done or had done Yesterday only matters if you choose to relive the choices you made then over and over.

Making a mistake once is just that a mistake; making it twice you need to start asking why I am here and why am I doing this.     If we continue to step out and into the sandbox over and over when we know we should not be doing something than we are clearly stepping out in our own free will and disobedience to all that may seem great, pleasurable and damning in the end.

There is a time and place for everything each day we are allowed up.

That does not mean those dreams we are dreaming are not meant to come true.   It just means anything that is good and lasting must be done right.

Always in truth, always in faith and always with clean hands and pure intentions.

 

How easy it is no matter who we are to get a little taste of sweetness that we envision up ahead.    Suddenly finding ourselves bypassing all that we want forever only for what we see, read, or feel in front of us.

We do not have to be alarmed when we have to slam the breaks on?  Realizing what are we doing?  Why are we doing it?  Is this what it should be if we want that which will last?

Where is that proof in the pudding?  Not that medicated pill the nurses and doctors will slip into it for temporary relief when we are old, and our minds do not work any longer.

Nothing forever is easy; nothing forever is just about what we feel!  What is forever in the temporal atmosphere we are allowed to experience here and now.

2 Corinthians 4:17-18(NIV)
¹⁷ For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. ¹⁸ So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.  

Minor setbacks, major changes nothing in-between will keep the believer from achieving the dreams they hold deep within their souls.

Making them last is what takes courage, takes effort, takes time.    Choosing happiness or that temporary fix leaving you to only be broken shortly after is not, should not ever be an option.

Picking up the shattered pieces after diving in and not taking in through God’s timing is never a pleasant experience.    God’s timing is never my timing for sure.  When I set my heart on something, I want it yesterday knowing even then it is not soon enough.  Even when I know I want forever throughout and into eternity.

Perhaps why for all those who ask me often why I am still single what is wrong with me.

Nothing other than I never want that quick fix, that one-minute relationship, that worldly fling filling up those temporal desires.     Left craving and wanting more yet left alone later.        Maybe I will understand when my ride to forever into eternity has come for all things I wait to seek in the unseen.    Maybe I will miss the train completely.    One thing is for sure.   The love, the lessons, the compassion, the passion, the loyalty, the respect   

It all matters!     That deep love you hold for those that never even do anything, but they do everything just by being in your life, a connection, a friend, family.   That journey awaiting that adds to that indescribable peace for who they are as a soul you have been blessed to connect.       Not the rush of fools, lies that we rush into. 

Learn what battles to jump into the middle of but always know when choosing God has already won the war.

 

Is what you are about to do worth the turmoil for whatever time you have left in the here and now.   Or is it something you know you can control and wait for whatever God has planned?

 

Hard to answer, for sure.   I have spent years since coming up out of that water, keeping my eyes down you know not making eye contact and if I do making sure I am surrounded up and fully engaged in obedient godly service acts so that I am never put in a situation that I may not be able to take back later.

But not even that; I never want to just get caught up in any moments just to find out I was so muddied with real feelings of need or desire in my humanity; the other soul who was not walking the walk or was just as weak as I became.    Really did not mean for anything to transpire either.

Leaving both souls to carry the burdens of purity and obedience stained and broken.

 

For anyone who does not read the bible, or not even that of reading the bible but honestly believing in Jesus Christ and just wanting the best of everything for everyone you come in contact with and for yourself.      It is hard to understand.  

What I can say is I  lived in the world my first 35 years of life.   I know the difference of the peace and the indescribable peace and love that walking with Jesus gives.    It does not mean I am not human.    Oh, gracious no!    I want my remainder of life husband, companion, king!     But never settle just because!    Never jump in just because you feel.  

No matter how much you want something, make sure you have truth in the vision board you have up ahead.     

I am never going to knock anyone who believes differently.   Far from it.   I just know what I long for; and my living in a place of peace and longevity when it comes to anything that will be along side of me means sometimes I miss what the world says I should jump in and take.    Or sometimes I just wait longer.

Really the thing to keep in mind is no matter what the situation, what the desires, what the anything or everything WE ALL GET TO CHOOSE!

Father wash me clean with that which tears flow for what I sometimes am overwhelmed; wash this world clean from all the hate and violence it is under siege with this day.

 

Guide and protect humanity in Your Will with and for kindness yet steadfast truth leaving no room to get caught up in what is harmful or the games of this world that sometimes transpire.

That exhilarating feeling of cat and mouse;  that rush we push for trying to grab what we long for all the while we never really have your blessing or full truth.

Jesus protect and heal mind, body, and spirit all of us and our needs.

Please I pray a hedge of protection all around all of our children may they have your strong will and purpose in all they do.

You Jesus are a just and loving God.    Thank you for allowing me another new day, thank you for allowing me to dream.  Thank you for allowing me my king as I wait for them to come. 

Lead us not into temptation but deliver us all no matter what that looks like from what is evil.  “Seek to be worth knowing rather than be well known” @TobyMac #SpeakLife

Be with all whom I am or have been connected Jesus giving them abundance of all you are.

 

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Revelation 17:14(NIV)
¹⁴ They will wage war against the Lamb, but the Lamb will triumph over them because he is Lord of lords and King of kings—and with him will be his called, chosen and faithful followers.”

 

John 15:13-15 (NIV)

¹³ Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. ¹⁴ You are my friends if you do what I command. ¹⁵ I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you.

 

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Date: 07/09/2020 Thursday

 

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/RXDsFtODgqM   “Dream Again” @ Matthew West

https://youtu.be/AfsS3pIDBfw  “Hands” @ Jewel

https://youtu.be/j-fWDrZSiZs    “White Flag ” @ Dido

https://youtu.be/0wBDDAZkNtk “Who Will Save Your Soul” @ Jewel

https://youtu.be/EKF6ghfcQic   “Head Above Water” @ Avril Lavigne

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Ephesians 3:20-21(NIV)  
²⁰ Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, ²¹ to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thank you, Father, for this new day.   Thank for all the days filled with even the simplest gifts of life. 

I know not everyone will be allowed to just breathe.  I know many will not get up.

  Many will never be found many will have their empty shells just lay where they are for days before someone puts them to rest.

I know Every second Of every minute counts 

One of the many reasons I came to you so long ago.   Yet still out here  just finding who I am to you for the first time.

Thank you for never allowing me to make it out of this place in my early days when I had no worth.

Thank you for even the slivers of dreams in my days that you have allowed to come to life.

Thank you for the truth that washes through and the acceptance to allow your will being done.

No many never have or will understand.

Thank you.       Lord be with all I have been blessed.

 

 

As I go through these thoughts spinning as they do; first thinking of all these foolish pretend games.   So much desire, want maybe even need that becomes so overwhelming you believe it can really be.      Everything perfect and then reality slaps you right back where I came from.

Oh, these hands God I need you more than I need this life itself.    So overwhelming in the nothingness, while all the while it becomes our everything!

 

I listen to who will save your soul; funny how that has been my text ringer for years.  Then I let Jewel just keep flooding back knowing with or without God when it comes to dreams then never went away.       They just hurt really bad as this feeling washes over me how appropriate the rain once again pours down.

Damn I cannot even say how did I get to this point in my life; but I can say this COVID19 has wreaked havoc on so many lives.

My changes, my new normal got me going back in time and thinking I have a snowballs chance in hell even though I am and will be a bride of Christ.

Fighting the elements is an understatement when it comes to keeping the lines clear.  Not falling back into those dreams, not feeling.    Shaking my head.  

These days trying to knock me down, knock me out.

Freaking rollercoaster rides and the rush of fools I am believing, no doubt!

I so hit my head against that wall to  many days; I need to be numb burying myself in worship this is insane.

Let it go let it be. 

So much more out there to get through, leading the way.

Oh, sweet Jesus what about them too.   I cannot ask why those we have along the way; are left to suffer in so many ways.

Still feeling the impact of a coworker, they found after missing from work 5days.  How heart breaking.  To know you go through life and in the end you have absolutely no one to lean in on and one day you just drop, and your shell stays there until someone does a wellness check to find you.

This life can be bitter cruel.    It is not the first time someone I know left this place or suffered as such.

I have always had that looking out spirit and the old fella down the street I would buy tv dinners so he would have food to eat.   He lived in his son’s house but had a brain tumor and the son could not be around.  So, he gave him a place to shelter.  But the man had no food, no money and real cooking was not an option because of his illness.

 

What about my old vet friend I use to visit every day just unable to get enough of the stories of life he would tell.   I think now allot was a bond of love like a father daughter relationship I never had.

How bad I felt when I finally convinced him to just do it; just reach out to the daughter he had lost connection with for so long.   Helped him move up to the Carolina’s thought everything was working out.

Use to call him every couple days just because.   It was when I tried for over a week no response, I knew his health was not good at all.   Finally calling his daughter myself just to do that wellness check.

Heartbreaking: he went home to be with family, living right down the road.  There he laid on his floor for over a week; having a heart attack when finally, from miles away someone had to say please just go see.

That sweet man who gave his all for a country that today does not care.    Never made it out of the VA.  

The damage was done why are we so broken here those feelings again come.

 

More stories of brokenness; oh, how God must be so let down with us in this world.

Even those of us who believe with all we are understanding what life is, is not what we got.

Even when Jesus is all we need.     At some point we look up and become overwhelmed feeling in this stormy sea.

Purity without a doubt.   Yet sometimes letting yourself go, those turtlenecks, hiding behind doors, or screens just are not enough.

Sometimes even though you know Jesus is the one pure true love.     You just want that forever while swimming in this deep.

Yet no where in sight does reality give you the real; to lock on what can be your story ending to keep.

Wash over me feelings that is right wash me clean.    No not dirty; just drowned in everything that makes no sense; drowning in this dream.

Never will it make a difference, no matter what words, or etchings are gleamed.  

Someone will always tell you what you want to hear, but never truly be what they say the love you want will always belong to someone else.  

This life, what is one more piece of me.   Thank you Jesus I am truly blessed to have survived this far, even if I do not know what or why you let me be.

I know, however.   Whatever will be will be.    Back in the shadows head down, tears flow I am yours father.  Where I was lost, I was found.  Here in the shadows shining brightly holding your crown.

No matter whatever is will be, whatever will be will be.  Whatever we cannot touch our souls still see.  

Be with all my connections Lord.    Bless them all with and for all their needs.    For it is you that allows us to be set free.

Whatever will be whatever is left.   Your will forever if I am not allowed.  Your will Jesus.    Remove the madness and stop allowing me to dream, for it is here and now.

 

It does not matter to this world what my heart hears or is torn.   Release and bless all that should be.  No matter what I feel, just raise it up, heal it, the speed of light the speed of now.

Forever Jesus the battle is real, but forever to you I bow! All I am, every was or want to be.   I give it all back to you.   Thank you, please take good care of all of what I am, all of what connections you have allowed me.

Is the battle of love real, beyond any shadow of a doubt!    Setting what you love free that huge risk that proves what really is or what just was.  

I cannot hold on; I cannot let go.   Everything I am has to be put back at the cross and I just have to breathe in the only thing that allows me to move forward.     Sometimes that hurts worse than life.

But we all will always be better than okay on any given day.   Life is what it is until it is not.  Sometimes we win; and sometimes we just lose allot!

 

Thank you, Lord, for the abilities to get caught up in these foolish games.   Raise up and take back all that I am to be for you.   Take back your world Jesus.   Your children, I will not raise the white flag to anything in this world. 

 

 

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Deuteronomy 30:20 (NIV)
²⁰ and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to give to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

Genesis 1:27 (NIV)
²⁷ So God created mankind in his own image,
    in the image of God he created them;
    male and female he created them.

Romans 12:2 (NIV)
² Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

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Date: 07/08/2020 Wednesday

 

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/GmGOVzCdw0M  “Singleness, Sex and Self-Control” @ Steven Furtick

https://youtu.be/heRHeX23r70 “Blessed Be Your Name” @ Chris Tomlin

 https://youtu.be/bR9UsXgIAjg  “Even Then” @Micah Tyler

https://youtu.be/9kg6EtcGq0I “One Day” @Cochren and Co.

https://youtu.be/j25JqWgjDF4  “I Know” @Big Daddy Weave

https://youtu.be/3eTOcrWu8mQ  “Church (Take Me Back)” @Cochren and Co.

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Psalm 138:2 (NIV)  

² I will bow down toward your holy temple and will praise your name for your unfailing love and your faithfulness, for you have so exalted your solemn decree that it surpasses your fame.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

When we push through the pain.  He gives and takes away.  We do not need to know the why’s!   

 

What we do with those moments, what we do next matters!

We have to trust because the alternative is having the worldly circumstances that fill us with doubt and hate to eat us alive and rob us from all peace that we were meant to grow through and forward with.

We can dwell and give darkness the glory allowing it to win in any circumstance.    But Why?

I have no answers, I just know we must just keep getting back up each day God allows you up with air in your lungs, movement in your body; even then we are to cling to the one who created everything. 

Alpha/Omega   maker of all things.   We can never let Him go.  As he never will let go of us as we walk by faith and not by sight.

None of it makes sense on most days I can guarantee that. 

 However, the peace you feel when you cling to God and not put everything there is in us back into someone or something that wounded us or this world.   

Thank you, Jesus, for allowing me up another new day blessed with opportunity even if my plans are not what I laid out this day, this week or even this lifetime.

There is something to be said to know what it is absolutely have nothing or no one going through life. 

To live in a New York State winter with no heat or hot water; to feel pain so badly you cannot breathe and you think you have died; yet somehow you find your way back to what the world says reality should be.

Thank you for each bird I am allowed to hear sing out; each babies laughter that becomes contagious, each broken vessel finding their way into the massive river of hope that you bled out for.

Lord I never have to call out any one thing specifically; you know all things. 

You know the how, the what, the when, even the why when it comes to the darkness or mistakes that sometime wash through or over us.

Yet, you are here for each and every soul that wants and lives with you as a priority in their hearts.    Even those who stray and get caught off guard not knowing how they got to where they are. 

 You are standing with your arms wide open waiting for us to spiritually run as fast as we can back to you.  Physically purposing with you waiting for us to call out and come to you; waiting for us to accept you to lead the way.      

The journey is never easy, it has never been said anywhere by you God it would be.   I want that passion that will never tire, never burn out Jesus.   With you I have that; and no matter how hard I believe or try.    The world has not yet been real to show up so I stopped looking; that is no lie.     Blessed, even in those moments tears flow and even with sadness so over whelming I want to crawl somewhere away and die. 

Your word speaks about man is not meant to be alone and that there will be troubles.   But with you all things are possible and will work out.

Beyond words the love you put into action Jesus will never be outdone.   We may fall physically into the arms of that one and only, we may play out all those images and dreams and even when that season has been taken away for whatever the reason.

No matter how bad the collateral damage pile is left behind.     You Jesus will teach all who wish to know truth what love really can and will be through your blood.

For this to know I am loved by you.   

Giving me strength in this world where nothing seems real, almost like you walk through the dream that you are just waiting to wake up.  

  Sometimes as the night goes forward the dreams expose so much darkness, sadness, brokenness others you find yourself clinging to what could be beautiful.

All of it just spinning around as you wait to be woke up.

What about those dreams that do wake you; those that you jump up out of a sound sleep, heart pounding out of your chest and at the time those who are connected are at risk.   What about the warnings you give and because maybe they were not supposed to hear; but truly feel what truth can be like when it plays out.

Yes, still waiting to be fully awake.   The door has been open, Pandora’s box more like it. 2020 it is no joke, not even a smile as there is nothing funny.

Lord I know you are just waiting for your children to run into your arms wide open.   Waiting for them to take their stand.

Even if it is believing in nothing, the waves are pounding on this world.   

So much damage will we ever recover?

Will there ever be that breath again reflecting your promise of new life?

 

Damn the COVID19, Damn the HATE. Damn the falling apart, quitting because we missed our mark, we missed our time, we stepped out, stepped under we did something so stupidly wild, we forgot you Jesus in all our perfect talents, trials, looks and styles.

Jesus, Your will be done in all things.  

I do not know what that looks like. 

I cannot imagine you carried me, saved me from so much.   For this to be it.

Come Father God raise up your trusted advisors, guardians, angels leading us where to go.

You have already one the war.     Why must we battle when it is so clear.

I never want to stop dreaming, live it out yes; never stop believing like a child watching your clouds, calling out all those imaginary images from bears to cows.

Jesus, fill us with the innocence and purity, your love that allows us to know what it is really like to care.  

To really matter in what we do,  to really have that someone matter deep inside me, deep inside you.

Seeking worth not caring who really knows us in the end so they have something to tell.

We know this world is not our home. 

Why can we not treat it with respect while we are here on loan.     As the world cries out the spirits moan.

Jesus, I need you now.     

Please guide, protect, leading all that I am.   All I have been allowed.   

Bless all my brothers in sisters, my connections, my loves; going through this IT right here right now.

 

God you know all I am tearfully no matter what that looks like.  

Take me back to deep in your will, your blessings.    

Being with all that I care for and about.   

You own everything thing I am. 

Everything I dream, everyone I am connected. 

Jesus take me back to where your will prevails and no more dreams that twist up the insides of how can it be, no more pain for all the unnecessary loss of humanity to the darkness,  wash clean all this  sorrow that has become the world of reality.    

Jesus heal, and just be with those of us who allow you in; all I know, or will someday again.    

All whose names your angels whisper; Father God together, in your will replacing all that has been lost for what is better on any given day; be with today or all that has been.  

Allow us to know, when words we no longer needed to explain!

Thank you for anything, anyhow, anyways; Thank You for Everything!

I found a love waiting for me; even with the torment of reality and missing truths rolling in the deep.   Twisting, churning,  fires burning I cannot breathe.   If only the truth would come to life allowing the world to know who you are.    Forever held, nothing to say or do.  Forever my dreams filled with pure Gods love, together grown.

Pull me from this abyss.   Running for my wall where only God allows truth in all. 

Blessed are all His chosen holding those jewels to the crown.      When I look around will it be you, I have found.

 

 

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

John 15:11 (NIV) ¹¹ I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.

1 Corinthians 13:12 (NIV)
¹² For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

 

============================================

Date: 07/07/2020 Tuesday

 

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/2_vPRfVMPE8 “Trust In God-Peace In the Storm” @ Ten Minutes of Morning Inspiration

https://youtu.be/1Ben2wwGyOk “How Can It Be” @Lauren Daigle

https://youtu.be/sY92RfThwAM “God Turn It Around” @Jon Reddick | Church of the City

https://youtu.be/wLkHygFqQno  “This Is A Move” @Brandon Lake and Tasha Cobbs Leonard

 

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Psalm 18:30 (NIV)  
³⁰ As for God, his way is perfect: The Lord’s word is flawless; he shields all who take refuge in him.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thankful for another new day.  Even if that puppy had way more energy than I do this morning.

Thankful for folks out here like Billy Graham, yes, I know he has went on up ahead, but He, and all who have made the morning peace devotionals  speaking truth and yes motivation is a beautiful thing.

Gosh I would never thought 30 years ago I would seek God first before trying to do anything else in life.      Far from perfect and never will pretend to be.  In fact, I can point out every flaw of my own as you know yourself best.    I know me.

I know where I have been, where I am today, and although I really do not know where I will be for any tomorrow’s given.

I know I will get up and give all I am with whatever I do or am allowed!

People are fortunate there is only one of me.     Trust me on that.    For this when you get to know me you will never forget me.  Especially on those times with fits of laughter so hard we are crying.   Oh, wait sometimes that is just me that cannot stop  then it becomes contagious.

I still remember as a kid sneaking in to see my baby niece sleeping, with my sister in the other room telling me do not you wake her up.   All of sudden that beautiful little face would just have the biggest smile like she heard her mama after me.

You guessed it if I were lucky, I would get out of the room not waking her up.  In come cases I would be just so warmed that I would start to laugh and before you knew it having all I could do to catch my breath.

Even today a child’s smile, a child’s laughter just does something to this spirit.   The biggest heart smile God could ever give to us the innocence of love and peace.

Sadly, although I still have fits of laughter over crazy stuff with people I am surrounded.   That beauty of a child is far and few between in the world we live.

 

Some of us as adults have forgotten our roles to lead the way, or we just do not care what we are leading the future into.   We are leading by example be we signed up or not.    Someone is always watching!   Those little hearts, those little minds absorbing what the world is pouring out.

 

I believe in allot of things.  This is true.   When we are out making a statement, when we are fighting for what is right, when we are trying to unify in peace and love.    Truly it is better to believe in something than nothing at all and just letting life spin you and people direct your steps.      I shutter at the thoughts.   

Even so, I jump up and run at times and acting without really being ready for what is up ahead.  Did I really read the directions; did I really hear what was being said?   Or did I only hear or see what I really wanted to?    Even if I know what the truth may be, do I still ride that wave believing the good is really good in those I am allowed to connect.  

Historically speaking; yes, I do, and truth has been.   No not everyone is the good you see in them.   Historically speaking.   People will temporarily be whatever you see them to be.  Until you wipe the glass and clarity sets in that you cannot get around.  Or they just move on because it is their time to find their next best life yet.

Or what about turning off all other things that may infringe, or not allow me that smile, that need, that whatever at the time.    When we hold ourselves back because we just do not know what is or what will be?

  Yes, I was that one fearless, always in the frying pan thinking I got this; what is the worse that could happen.

Always believing in whatever anyone would say.   Those lessons were pure and hard.

Yet here and now;  you better get the crane and show up to make me understand what is or is not.

I honestly think not doing something because we have to stay in our comfort zone does rob us from allot in life.  

 But sometimes we just have to make hard decisions and sometimes we win, sometimes we lose.

I am not a judge; in truth I do not plan even or especially what comes to mind and God allows me to put out here.  

If it comes to my scribing; what I plan and write about what is on my heart, well usually we are right back to what I often wake up missing with thoughts of that sweet forever.

Somedays I do all my devotions first before, others like today I just start letting it flow.

I am more from history and experience one that really does question why, or how it can be. 

 Good, bad, or indifferent.

 If it is too good to be true, remember that most likely it is.

 Unless it really shows up in front of you, even if it does what is the end result intentions.   Yes, always thinking out loud way too much.  

 

Then the other side of that coin we do  not hold back but run full force. 

 

  When we just jump and run through the motions handling whatever comes next or what about those that just do what they do and good bad or indifferent not even caring what the results are, or how they impact so many around them in harm, disrespect and teaching the world nothing matters.  

 

 They do what they do laughing along the way and just keep on going because they can!

Gosh I wish I could see the future to know what was going to pour out of this mind maze.  

When it comes to my writing I have been blessed and even sometimes cursed to just let it flow.     

With my writing which even words can make or take a life. 

We do not have to hold them back; we do not have to speak them we do not have to write them.

Any form of how we communicate flows out like that tsunami wave that washes over and washes away everyone on the edges.   

Prayerfully I am always able to hold these fingers or even my tongue when it comes to just being angry or hurt and wanting to hurt anyone around me no matter how bad things are in any situation.

Far from perfect.   I can assure you.   Driving for so long and so many miles to and from my place of employments. 

  I forget when aggressive drivers try to suck me.  You know that crazy stuff where your doing 70 miles an hour down a highway then someone just jumps in front of you and goes 30.   

Those unexpected choices other people made that touch everyone around them.

  They may have planned that is how they think their driving should be.  

Just as I believe do the speed limits. 

Sometimes even make it happen a little faster and break the law.

  Right, you know it is okay to go 4 miles per hour above whatever the speed sign says.   They usually will not pull you over within that range, right? 

   As I sit here with this big grin on my face knowing how many people that setting their cruise control.  Knowing yes, I have done it.

At what point do we really become obedient no matter who says what, or what friends we lose along the way.

 

At what point do we purpose every day to get up and do the best we can.   

At what point do we acknowledge there is nothing perfect in this world.

The only perfect anything in this life is the one who allows us to have life itself!    Jesus Christ!

Let us face it we do not always plan out and make the best choices with any steps we take.   In many cases we do what we do at the time because of the urge, the excitement, the void that is being filled right then and there.  

 And when it is done, we walk away going on with day today like it never happened just holding that smile deep within because we are collectors of all that is temporary.

Yes, because a day, a week, ten years or even ten minutes.   We are doing it over and over again.     

IT: you know what your IT is as I do mine.

Not all choices we do not plan but act on are bad.     Some are the most beautiful things in this worldly life that can ever happen.      Even if those do not last, they leave beautiful visions and memories that etch into our souls forever.     Those things that give us the greatest peace.    Just as we exhale and knowing they are the next best thing to having the creator sitting right next to us in our conversations and hanging out with us every single day.      Filled with so much love, advise, purpose!

Call it whatever you will but knowing the one and only God that created this universe who exhaled and life from dust was created.    The one who still every day we are give allows us to breathe in and breathe out!

Jesus do you know Him?        Because he is with us no matter if we are hanging out with him, apologizing for the choices we made and left impacts and messes to be cleaned up.   Or we cannot go a day without seeking Him first in all things.

No matter what choices we plan or jump in and run with.   Do you know HIM?

You can do and believe whatever you want.  But the fact remains, and you can look it up yourself if you do not already see it in front of you.     We all believe in something.  We all have our God or idols. 

But the one true God of all the heavens all the earth.   Is the same God that sent His one and only son to the earth in human form just like us!

And Jesus in all he lived for, believed for the greater good, for Love suffered, died and can live again in anyone of us.   

When we pull that empty chair out and ask Him to please hang out and lets chat.

Giving Him all the burdens, all the bad habits, all the things we keep doing over and over that are leaving destruction behind our trail.

It is then when you make that personal relationship yourself with Jesus that you fully understand and want the truth in all that God is and can be.

 

It is then that no matter what our talents or those we think we are lacking,  really no longer become who we are.    Because none of us are what we do. 

 

Yes, we may be this great hacker, this great actor or actress, this great spy, this great musician, this great writer, this great dancer, this great vocalist, this great athlete, this great lover.     We can all get full of ourselves,   just as we can all lose ourselves to the world and find ourselves never being good enough.

Man, that balance every day even for those who are different.     It is hard and like every relationship that will ever be, every connection no matter if they are next to us or we cannot see them.    We have to work at it!

We get so confused with what we do when we are working at it.    Sometimes we want to be what or who we are not.  Other times we want someone in our lives we promise what we cannot give or in most cases we give away who we are which we can never get back.    

The spin is vicious every day.

Why would we not want that person, that thing that babies smile that fills us up with so much warmth we cannot contain the laughter the heart smiles out?

 

I can pick a billion beautiful things about so many souls; I can point out all the great things I have achieved in my own life.    Just as it unfortunately comes easier the things that are not so right come allot faster.     Easier especially when you just do not have a good excuse why you should move to the left or right or any direction in life.

The best choice anyone can ever do is know who Jesus was, who He is here and now.

When we do that, we do not stop making choices that sometimes ripple out to those we love and care about.

 

But we truthfully when really diving in and learning allowing that unseen faith, and that abundant hope no matter what storm or rainbow is pouring out across the skies.    

We finally know without any physical proof that unspoken hope just lives deep within side of us.      We without planning just seek out the peace and what is everlasting in life.     Even when the world goes horribly wrong around us.    Even when those we love, and trust let us down.   Even when we sit totally alone.  We know we have finally been found.

I cannot explain it.    Just 30 years ago I would have never seen myself here not worried how things are going to work out.     Yes, I panic sometimes.   But in all truth.  I know to whom I belong.    With that, no matter if I get 50 more years and yes, my genetics have longevity, my great grandmother lived to be 103.  

God, I hope not in this world today.   But whatever the case, as long as He allows me the sight, and to be a vessel and if that means just watching my actions before jumping, watching what I do or say.    If that means I am blessed with that longing heart’s desire; or just put it away never losing hope and faith for all we love.

I know as crazy as it sounds too many.    I know I am loved.

I will never deny I always wanted more.   In my journey I have had so much.   From pieces of me to all those material things including money.  Tossed out, given away, torn, or tattered.    All those things we cannot take with us.      I will never say they never mattered.

 

I will say what is real, what is pure, what is eternal.  That is the beauty through all of the messes, the ashes, the broken dreams. 

  What is truth, in our choices.  What is it or why do we do what we do?

For whom?   Self? You, Me?     We own our choices, so no matter if you are doing everything or anything for that special someone.    Are they the real you that needs to be, that balances your harmony?   Are they just accepting because of all those things?

 

WE all get to choose.   No matter at the surface level, or souls deep.      

 

I am blessed and pray you also say you are or will be.

 

Father God lead me, healing this land.   Guide my steps, my words and all that goes for every day I am allowed.

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalms 20:7 (NIV) ⁷ Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God.

1 John 1:9(NIV) ⁹ If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

Luke 1:79 (NIV)  ⁷⁹ to shine on those living in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the path of peace.”

============================================

Date: 07/06/2020 Monday

 

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/ZYkZE8AogDE   “God Of All My Days” @Casting Crowns

https://youtu.be/R3ynLHZurRs    “Look Up” @People and Songs (ft. Wesley Nilsen, Mary Grace, and Libby Swan)

 https://youtu.be/BOK8F9caDic  “Champion” @Bethel Music and Dante Bowe

 

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Matthew 24:35 (NIV)  
³⁵ Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Good morning Lord, thank you for that beautiful sky so early in the darkness, that beautiful moon giving all who believe in you hope to know that somewhere out there so many are looking up and knowing how blessed no matter what the circumstances we are blessed.

 

No matter what those biometrics I went and had done this morning remind me of.  Still blessed.     Telling the Covid19 virus how much I hate it this morning getting on that scale weighing in.

 

Could be worse although could be better.      All about perspective, I guess.    It is what we make it, it is what is until it is not!

I will not lie;  I have always been self-conscious about me.  Always trying to find that sweet spot.   Maintaining and people noticing but for me and not what I look like on the outside.

 

Sure, I could be like a billion others out there wearing this or that or gosh even nothing at all.    But then I would be mad at allot of people for not looking at me for who I am but only what they see on the outside.

 

I will not lie, I use to strut that stuff, loving being on the beaches in my youth living in the swim suite with or without shorts.   Always active in the middle of a volleyball game.    Even being tackled a time or two being so competitive.

Time is our blessing and curse; but the blessings are what we choose to take through the journey when we are given another new day.

So somedays I may have a little bit harder time shaking off the day before or the emotions that overwhelm me.   

All of that which I do not understand, or even all of what with all this time have me thinking way too much.

Every moment I am allowed to getup and get outside before the sunrises, where I can look up in the calmness and beauty of God’s canvas.    I remember when I see that beautiful moon hanging shining bright.    

Just who is in control.  Just who has allowed the creation of all beginnings and released the time we have when it is time to end.  

God is on the move https://youtu.be/yPB9ENSd1Xc    “God Is On The Move” @7^th Time Down and the sooner we accept all we mean to Him the more peace and abundance we will receive.  Even in the storms! 

 

 

Allot can happen between each breath.     But if you are not done here and now yet; give thanks and know there is so much more waiting.

The beauty of all the connections God allowed you to have. 

Good, bad, or indifferent!   

Scars are like the spikes the rock climber uses to reach the highest peak.   

 

For all the love in action, service, words we may or may never receive.    Let go of all the hate that hurt has spawned.   

Because in truth whoever cut you does not even know who you are.    Yes, the physical being that stands right next to them.   Could even be a spouse for years or just an unmet friend.

The truth is if God got you up, no matter what is or is not.   We all get to choose how we will move forward; living our best lives with whatever we have got.

Speaking life starts right within me.  

Oh, I can be my own worse enemy.  Shooting myself down, never to be good enough thinking out loud. 

Until I remember it is never about what we lost; but the journey and love in what is waiting up ahead to be found.

So, as I stood at this early appointment and the room was so crowded. 

Looking around when the Lab tech yelled out to everyone.  I am the only one on today, so please understand it will be awhile before I am able to get started. 

I found my peaceful place I always like to be.  Even when I do not understand or cannot see.

I found myself silently scanning the room.  Feeling abundantly blessed knowing I belong to the one who someday will be coming back.   Be it in my time or soon.

The Lord heard my heart, even before I hit the floor and got started.

For this I am blessed no matter what is or is not.

No matter how corny it sounds to anyone who just does not understand.    The desires of our hearts never end up as we plan.

 

 Just always remember alone or together.  Right or wrong.   We all must stand for something or stand for nothing at all.  https://youtu.be/G_Vzpjv_kR4 “Stand” @Rascal Flatts

 

Either way we get to choose the day and remind ourselves to get back up, brush off, say thank you after every fall.

Knowing each day is not the same but thanking God who allows them above it all.

I can keep rambling on but right now that poet keeps sneaking in. 

 So, I will end this moment knowing there is nothing greater that can ever separate us from God’s love.    We can walk away, we can run.    

We can try filling those voids, gaps cracks and creases.   With so many things that are temporary and even sometimes meaningless.

Trust in God and not fear what ever is unclear.    

Lift up all your needs, your dreams, all that matter to you all that matter to me.

Even what you cannot see.

Love you for you and me for me.     Knowing in Christ anything can be.     When things are hard, pray harder.  When things are abundant, praise stronger.   

When we just do not know.  Seek his will!

Jesus is and always will be our breath, our healing, the one and only that blesses us with love.

I am blessed I am thankful for the ability to always remember to just look up!

 

It is okay to be sad for all we have lost, but never look past all the new we have found.

It is okay to be down not wanting to be a burden, it is okay to not understand, it is okay to think by walking away may be best all around.

Just pray no matter what, before anything you do or having that final say.

We cannot change anyone, nor are we supposed to.   

We cannot make anyone love us, even if we beg them to stay.

We cannot tolerate their disrespect, lack of care for themselves or towards us in anyway.

We must brush off, and pick up our stencils, our brushes and reflect in our portion of the canvas.    What colors, what boldness what blessings we have left.

 

With clean hands, pure hearts. https://youtu.be/EhKSRIvDFI0 “Good Grace” @Hillsong United     Its not over its just in neutral awaiting acknowledgement to start.

What can I say, what can I do?   But offer this heart all of me completely to you.   Thanking God alone for all the lessons, helping me find my way out of all the messes.  

All I am is yours, as I have surrendered for all that is good, all that is pure.

All that will be or nothing at all.   Forever God I am in your hands.   I am nothing without you or anyone you put in my way.    I will take the stand with all I can, all I am!

https://youtu.be/UbiErL_pc8M   “The Stand” @Hillsong United

 

All I am is yours as Jesus the one who gave it all; so, we could live in peace, in harmony in and with love.   Being the mercy and grace shining one beacon at a time.

When we are knocked down.  

Say thank you as you are getting back up as you are not out.  Not yet.   For each new day, no matter how bad it hurts; no matter how much deception, no matter what is or will be.      Say thank you God for always being with me!       

Be the light, shine on your best you in all you do, and think before all you say.  In a world full of hate be that light https://youtu.be/fkBtrPWSKM8 “Be a Light” @Thomas Rhett ft. Keith Urban, Chris Tomlin, Hillary Scott, Reba McEntire

 

 

Yes, I fall short miserably daily!  If it is not allowing the stress to get to me and not holding my tongue.  It is allowing myself to beat down the one who I can be.  

 Not only that yes lately letting the desires of my heart get the best of me. 

 Acknowledging just belonging to a God who is all things in a world that can make us so lonely and sad at times.

Opening up that door to all that could be.

It is okay, be it come to life or just that imagination I dream.   

For nothing will ever change the love I have been blessed.   That which I am able to share, that which I am able to learn.

Oh, I feel the burn, as Jesus breathes life into this soul.    No matter what stays or what goes.    

Never will I acknowledge all I am enough for the blessings that Jesus is King and the one and only Lord.

Jesus is the friend of sinners. https://youtu.be/BY6VAy9y_iQ “Jesus Friend of Sinners” @Casting Crowns

 There is nothing less, nothing more that anyone can say or do.  Unless of course you have not made him a personal friend to you.

 

Father God thank you for this new day of opportunities.  May I have the same faith in those you place in my heart and all I am to be for them.  As the unseen faith and awareness, I have in you.  

   May I purpose  to be the better me every day I am given.  No matter who stands with or beside me.  No matter what  I do not look like, sound like, or even feel like.

Above all things Lord, please always here these unspoken prayers seeking you, and your will.    

Wash over us Father God!  Heal all that we did not even know was broken until we fall upon the love you have blessed.

In truth, respect, Loyalty, the abundant grace, and love.   Unending joy only you allow have mercy on your children.

 Those afternoon thoughts

Oh, where have these days gone by

What happened to this world where we cannot even trust what we see, even what we say because today its real tomorrow it based on how the world feels.

 People cursing this people cursing that

Always complaining about everything even how they are so stressed yet change none of it

What is that It which is so much more important  What is it that you are ready to battle maybe even die for?

I know my words in 2020 have been a ride with four flat tires.    Way too much time to think about people, places things and even yes even those long-lost dreams that once set me on fire.

Downtime for me for you

Make the best of it; because that is all we have left to do

Nothing gained, everything lost stay your distance or those your love pay the cost.

Jesus died for so much more.   Yet humanity is burning buildings, burning dreams, burning this or that store.

Killing of good souls, how many I wonder did they truly save no one will really know.

Yet I wake this morning with one of those days I am feeling blessed beyond deserving where you laugh any moment or just bust down and cry.

With everything I am here and now looking up, pointing up to that wide-open sky!

Just thankful for today is one of those days for me.

Nothing fancy, nothing I can speak.    Just woke up acknowledging how even if this is only a moment in God’s timing.

I am thankful for every breathe he has allowed me to inhale, every story in my head, book ever read.

The beauty in God’s promise looking up, every chance we can.    Tomorrow is never promised and yesterday will never be here again.

I am blessed for every single connection I have been given.   Blessed through the scars and heartbreaks and all the abilities cleaning up messes.

Today I am beyond thankful.   I am still alive and allowed to be.  Oh, how I pray  that all I know knows Jesus and the blessings he has waiting.

There is no love ever without God’s design.    Do not fool yourself please by what the world says it should be.

Talking about relationships; it takes abundant work from the you’s and the me’s!    It takes all you have selflessly!    It takes want, desire and need!     It takes giving sometimes more balancing out the need.

It takes more than that racing heart, that release those never-ending dreams.

But if you want it bad enough, with God all things last beyond forever into eternity.

Does not matter what kind of relationship it is.    There is an absolute of take and give; if you want it to grow and live.

I am grateful, blessed beyond all deserving.     My great romance novel no matter who I am blessed.  Will always be my God nothing less!

You will are you, your choices and what you decide to be; I am always just going to be me.     If we connect, I consider it a blessing and something greater that what the eyes to see.

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Isaiah 9:6 (NIV)
⁶ For to us a child is born,
    to us a son is given,
    and the government will be on his shoulders.
And he will be called
    Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God,
    Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.

Zechariah 9:9 (NIV)
The Coming of Zion’s King

⁹ Rejoice greatly, Daughter Zion!
    Shout, Daughter Jerusalem!
See, your king comes to you,
    righteous and victorious,
lowly and riding on a donkey,
    on a colt, the foal of a donkey.

Romans 8:15-16 (NIV) 
¹⁵ The Spirit you received does not make you slaves, so that you live in fear again; rather, the Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship.^[a] And by him we cry, “Abba,^[b] Father.” ¹⁶ The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children.

Exodus 3:5-6 (NIV)

⁵ “Do not come any closer,” God said. “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy ground.” ⁶ Then he said, “I am the God of your father,^[a] the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac and the God of Jacob.” At this, Moses hid his face, because he was afraid to look at God. 

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Date: 07/05/2020 Sunday

 

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/GeCClzNCfcA    “HeartBreak Warfare” @John Mayer

https://youtu.be/-hDJNGK0MiQ  “The Elements” @TobyMac ft. Ledger

https://youtu.be/1spkhp41ig4 “Beautiful Things” @Gungor 

https://youtu.be/Xx5CRq74YXc   “Never Can Say Goodbye” @Michael Jackson

https://youtu.be/yLr6G8Xy5uc   “Lead Me” @Sanctus Real

 

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Isaiah 12:4 (NIV)  
⁴ In that day you will say:  “Give praise to the Lord, proclaim his name;
    make known among the nations what he has done,
    and proclaim that his name is exalted.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thank you, Lord, for this day and another new week.  No matter what may be up ahead as you were and always will be always available for those who believe.   Those who want to see in what only comes through the airwaves.

 

Placing as much hope with all their prayers no matter what is or is not.

Fighting the battles of heartbreak warfare.     All those elements that we need to lace up for and forge forward.  No matter how deep the cuts no matter who is right, wrong or eve crazy nuts.     We are nothing without you deep within the spirit to live Jesus that drives us desperately wanting and allowing love to pour out from our veins.

Who would utterly understand the love of an unseen Man; feelings overwhelmed by that unspoken indescribable peace?    He gives it to you or to me.   All we must do is step forward know and live for the one true great king.

Some of us do, some of us have.    Some of us lost in the spin have truly went mad.

As I listen to the storms pour down.     I will forever know there is no greater love than that with Jesus I have been blessed and found.

He has always been there, day in and day out.    I was so busy for years trying to rescue me, trying to work things out.   Chasing just to belong.   Just to have that forever one hold always even when they would not be around.

It was through those battles the world, darkness, and all available opportunities.

It was there the truth cut deeper, being chewed up alone, filled with just why.

 

Pain ask me what it feels like from an incredibly young age.  I am sure it started far before the having my foot run over by a car or less than a year later screaming out fighting for air and for so long walking dead.   The same people you are to believe, laugh at your tears and screams.

How could I ever forget?    Those elements almost like they made sure I never could; even if I will never remember anything but trying to jump out of that car.

God makes beautiful things in so many ways.  Perfect peace through all the storms on any day.

I wish I may, I wish I might.   If only that was what tried to take me out in the struggles to just find life.

I have to go back to the beginning where it all started, even years later.   No, I am not holding back.  As I have learned so much climbing so many mountains even having my own seas parted.

They say you have to hit rock bottom before you really know life and allow Jesus in to get started.

I can assure you it’s true  as He is the only one that that does not just use you.    He may not be present but somehow with so much courage so much strength you just know what to do.

Please do not try to understand me as I will not try to figure out all that you do.

We all have things baggage in that forever lost time capsule trying to dig its way back out.

Yet if we learn from even the deepest pain, realizing no matter how hard to trust and believe in all you want to work out.   Somehow His message is clear allowing you to sleep soundly for moments enough allow strength to want and do more than just survive.

No longer numbing the pain, filling what was empty is long dead.    Even when you still desire and want it all.

Even if you find you are the one cleaning up everyone else’s messes instead.

Learning it is not about me.   How can it be when life is what it is from every end of this universe, we all have to see.

We all have to choose.

I lost my mind just enough before I could even tell time.   All I know is not what is, but what can be.

The battles rage within in, How, When, or even Why Me?

My desires are far beyond what I do not know if I will ever see.  I am transparent always thinking out loud to clearly.

 

Not dead yet, no none of us are.  If we are allowed up another new day take a deep breath and know you have so much more to do, so much more to say.     But acknowledge who allows you choice, who is in control and tomorrow is never promised, so we must do all we can to live today!

To dance in the rain wash over me, wash away all that was once pain.   To love you for you, me for me.   Believing in every second no time to waste we must begin, with tomorrow never promised it could be the end.

If only it were me, if only I knew then what I know now.  No not holding back from what was thrown to the cross so long ago.

Just show up and show me how to know.   One step in front of the other.  Living my best life what a dream.    Yet so caught up trying to protect, trying to not to bleed.

Where is my faith, I truly wonder?    Needing to let go, but never will I leave the babes in the devil’s blunders.

 

Every vision of life you are just there, never searching, stopped that long ago.    Finding myself doing all I can to run from.  How funny this life is as each day we are allowed up.

Chasing seeking trying to fill back then.    Here and now running as fast as I can away to believe.      It does not matter how many things I have achieved.    None of it matters in the end.    

 

Just wanting that one in the here and now you know you can always depend.   Wanting that one you know would do what it takes to be into you as you are them.

We are not meant to be alone Genesis 2:18  (NIV) ¹⁸ The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”  

Even if I wonder what went terribly wrong in this world and how we use up so many and damage our youth and promises of any boy or girl.

Lord you know every ounce of me, this spirit, this heart the visions I need.   Needing your blessing more than anything.     

More than words, material things, or fun and games.   Jesus that forever to be life.

Lead me.   I need you to lead me forever in the promises of all that forever etched in the eternal peace and just knowing even when things are far from perfect; forever will never be long enough with you and all you bring making what we call life.

 

As I know I am alive listening to this rain.   Feeling all of what I took on yesterday.  Thankful and just come what may.     I needed you then, I need you now I will need you always.

If it is better to hold on the grasp is tight; but if your will Jesus is for me to shut down and just letting, go.  Please just show me what is wrong, what is right. 

Give me something, what next.   I do not need the why.  

It is you alone Father God that owns everything about this life!

Even when I am running as fast as I can away of all unknown, fighting to stand and believe and not shut down.   .

I am beyond thankful even blessed beyond deserving.   Even when according to the world my standards are simple.   No matter what is or is not.

What happens when we have so much, it is just never enough.     What happens when we work hard for all of it, but even in the moments in time the freedom and spirit it takes us so high.  

What happens when the world defines us by what we do and not who we are?  What happens when we believe those lies?

I wish I had the perfect answer, I could fix so much for so many just by closing my eyes.    The dreamer still in me even of you every single moment; every day every night.

This mind maze firing, the rabbit whole wide open the spin starting to glow.

Thankful for this day and blessed beyond all I may ever be, reflect or even go.

 

We must fulfil the contract of our soul’s destiny.  Which choices can only be what we decide? Nothing temporary of what we think we may be able to live with here and now will   ever fulfill our eternity.  Yours or mine, bitter yet so very sweet.

 Knowing that, having someone in the journey allows you to touch the stars, growing in the sun and living deeper than any ocean.  Nothing however is forever even when it is real.   From dust we came dust we will return.  

Setting souls free in His Mercy and Grace is how in the end we came to be in the beginning.

With tears flowing in love no lie.  Whenever you look up at the moon; forever I will always see you.    I hope with prayers your heart will forever see me too.

Always praying for you in your best life!   I cannot say goodbye, but I will someday see you on the other side.

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)
³⁸ For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,^[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, ³⁹ neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Psalms 56:3-4 (NIV)
³ When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.   ⁴     In God, whose word I praise—
in God I trust and am not afraid.      What can mere mortals do to me?

Psalms 56:3-4 (NIV) 
³ When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.  ⁴     In God, whose word I praise—
in God I trust and am not afraid.      What can mere mortals do to me?

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