06.Wk4_2020_June(PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)

Music pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ and are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise and are free for public consumption****   (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)

Date: 06/27/2020 Saturday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/UDDMYw_IZnE @ “Perfect” @Ed Sheeran

https://youtu.be/vqIvoFWFhds  @ “This Is Not Where I Belong” @Building 429

https://youtu.be/LxqHo2Pvfm0   @ “Listen To Our Hearts” @Casting Crowns

https://youtu.be/3kxWMq7gGF8    @ “Heaven Come” @Jenn Johnson

 

:5

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Matthew 16:25 (NIRV)

²⁵ Whoever wants to save their life will lose it. But whoever loses their life for me will find it.

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalms 143:8 (NIRV)
⁸ In the morning let me hear about your faithful love, because I’ve put my trust in you.  Show me the way I should live because I trust you with my life.

Genesis 28:15 (NIRV)
¹⁵ I am with you. I will watch over you everywhere you go. And I will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised you.”  

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

 

To be blessed in this journey is only that of who beholds the truth in the way of the one who allows breath.   To try and understand from the outside looking in.   You will never really understand where it starts or where it ends.   But every soul connected along the way.   Has given meaning, love, lessons to each new day.   

Thank you, Lord, for allowing me up, thank you for allowing me broken pieces along the way.  

Thank you for the deepest desires that very few have washed over me like that 100-foot wave.   As the days come and go.    Forever You God.   No other words, that is all I understand right here right now; that is all I can believe and reveal as I go.

 

Waking up thinking why I left that alarm on, and why do I have to have so many pets in this house.  Once they even hear me roll over it is a done deal.    

Feeling a little meh!~

Last night coming in from the market and going to grab the milk dropping it and the jug splitting wide open from the seam and milk going all over the kitchen floor.

Nope I do not cry over spilled milk ever.    Even the broken glass containers that sometimes shatter in this life no longer matter when you look at the grand scheme of things in today’s world.

Meh!` why?

I have nothing to get up for today it is Saturday after all.    Minor details of knowing one is alive and still movement in this body.   Thankful Lord regardless of what is or what is not you gave me another new day.

Getting the pets fed and out, now sitting down to tap out some of what this mind never turns off.

First thing thinking of Love, thinking of God thinking just how beautiful to feel something so meaningful.  Perfect with Ed S. comes to mind.    One of my favorite thoughts dancing in the dark or the daylight it does not matter.    Just being held knowing you are loved.     

Where you just breathe in the essence of the depths of one’s soul.    Sneaking those moments before world invades and suddenly the persona of expectations take over and suddenly, we cannot even recognize why we started or much less how we will allow it all to end.

 

Looking in from the outside always sometimes more than others.   Just knowing this is not where your dreams begins or ends.   Just never knowing how or what to do.  So the only thing you do know absolute is the peace and love that walking with the maker of heaven and earth allows.

Not settling, not even giving up.   Just knowing you are a different shade of pink and they will always be a different shade of blue.

Wanting to believe what once was in the depths but you know there is so much you do not even want to know.   

 Not flawed, you would have to be looking for something with expectations and really be granted the power to point out the flaws.   

Just the package deal we get sometimes is far greater than we want to step out of the comfort zone in truth to take on knowing in the end love in purity and just living simply is all that could ever be.

Yours, mine too much too beautiful to ever allow the souls to be mucked up by a world that uses up truth leaving us broken in the corner never to be felt or seen it does not matter for any boy or girl.

No matter how crazy or hot that fire inside through words is ever described.  Just always having that great respect for the blessing of knowing reality and desire and hope just somewhere in time.

Great adoration for oh so many, that sweet soul spirit leader that you would do anything for God to help shine the light through.

But no where in the cards, in this vision was there ever a plan for you.

Forever my heart smiles even through the tears.

Like for that which is special forever in my prayers.

It is never a game, never chasing fame, never part of the collector’s plot.    That love for who the depths of you only never for what is to come or what you have got.

Feelings deeply, life movement through any thought more so in every song.

Calling out this wandering spirit to come back home.

Much needed time away, as God has opened the vast window to the airways.    So much cooking up within, just for life in this broken world not sure what to believe all the while holding my voice in what is bursting at the seams to be able to say.

I will never run; this is truth on any given day.  However sometimes you have to lay down your arms and just let it go and be what may.

Never will I take away anything out of a journey for anyone on any given day. Sometimes you just have to know your worth, owning your journey and choose your happy.

So, when God whispered your name and had me look your way.  Not for a minute did I believe you were being the real you.

Playing along cause is it not that what we are supposed to do?

It is all good because I am out long before anyone plays foolish games.

I personally do not care what you look like or even what is in the name.

I personally know I have never been like anyone else and my heart will forever smile and never be the same.

I personally know I am forever a Jesus Girl; no matter what seeps out or is forever hidden deep down.     No matter the smiles for I know whom I belong on any given day. 

Here and now as the world spins. Not even as weird as it may seem.   

Dig deep walking forward no matter what we do.  Always have a pure heart, and hands that are forever clean.

Unfortunately depending what path, we have taken, the world will always make that harder than it ever has to be.

Yet, we get to choose.  You or Me.    We get to choose even that which we can never touch but forever see.

 

Father God, you know and see everything.   Let what you will to grow and what should not just let it be.

Guide and protect those of us who daily get back up no matter what was wrong or right but get back up to grow forward having no issues to shine your light.

This great land you allow us to wander, needs you and all your angel army to come end the darkness now.

For me Lord,  Give me one reason not to cling to you, give me one reason to not share that what is flowing through these veins.

Anyone can be a great storyteller; anyone can have anyone they choose.  

I am just a speck in this airway whom you allow to get back up.    Torn, broken more ways over the years than any given day.

Pieces of me of you in this beautiful mosaic abstract game of life.   Stuck in the middle of that sweet and sticky huge bun.

How many will take what they do from anyone because they can.   It does not matter my insecurities, honest jealousy, flaws, and scars.

Life is what it was, I am not nor ever will be who you are.    I am always me; beautifully broken to and through the eyes that see.   To the creator I am everything He has ever wanted me to be.

Even if I cannot willfully pretend, I could manage anything more for which scares the hell into me.

Rise up in unity Lord all you have called to be.    Allow Love deeply blessed before you the one true King.

Never stop allowing love from a distance and call to order, call to action the great healing that right here right now is needed.

Bless the soul lost who pretended but ended up not enough for existence in this world to be.

Release in all I am what you want me to do or who you want me to be.   Forever hold me in your dreams you know you are always in my thoughts as I pray you forever think of me.  https://youtu.be/Vf0qw6aVt_E @ “You’ll Think Of Me” @Keith Urban

One day we will see the light, be it here or on the other side.   Just always know Jesus is the only one truth that will allow anything to ever be.  https://youtu.be/BhasSpSBdEE  @ “Ever Be” @Kalley | We Will Not Be Shaken

Sometimes you just need to absorb the alone time so the weirdness works itself out. 

No one knows what will or if tomorrow will be.    Never explain how or why you feel anything  

All it does is leave us feeling and looking foolish. 

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Date: 06/26/2020 Friday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

 https://youtu.be/6VUewj9rRoI @ “Love Like Thunder” @RICHLIN ft. Ryan Stevenson

https://youtu.be/LCG1eHw7wKs @ “But For The Grace Of God” @Keith Urban

https://youtu.be/0IQU-DhOmS0  @ “Hymns on Guitar” @Guitar Worship Music

https://youtu.be/DX67rHyTdmM   @ “To The Table” @Zach Williams

https://youtu.be/TkAobgeefaY  @ “Father Son Spirt” @Jason Upton

 

:5

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Leviticus 19:18 (NIRV)

¹⁸ “ ‘Do not try to get even. Do not hold anything against any of your people. Instead, love your neighbor as you love yourself. I am the Lord. 

 

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thank you, Lord, for this new Friday that you have allowed me up to find your beauty, your blessings, and so many opportunities with any choice I make.

   

Everything always happens for a reason and we can chase the world trying to find out why or how we can convince the maker of all things why we should change those reasons.    Perhaps because we are scared, broken from previous reasons or it just does not make sense.  Which would be the reasons we do anything.

Be it try to figure things out, prove something or just walk away.   Whatever the end result is from our own choices on how we handle anything.

However, when it comes down to needing to know why.

Biblically speaking Peter tells us about always being ready to give an answer to everyone who asks concerning hope but not once does, he say give reasons or reasonings.   

 Sure, we can try to reason, argue, or even force our believes why we hold on to hope and faith.  But if someone is not with the same faith or beliefs as you.    All you do is end up spinning on that wheel that eventually throws us into the pool of the world.   

 Swimming in the sea of sharks with vultures over head to strong arm us into proving we are wrong, and they are right even when they do not have a clue why but the exceptions of what they can physically hold on to.

Always someone out there watching, always someone wanting something of you but not willing to give even the smallest slice of who they really are.  Even when they are right in front of you all your life you sometimes really do not know them.   Much less those who you never get to meet.

Just random thoughts as always, thinking forward, thinking back, and knowing all I have in me is to hope for the Lord Jesus Christ to reveal himself   Trying not to get too caught up in the unknown, lost in my own dream world or promises of the unseen of this world we live.

Hard, sad in a way, safe in others.   But at peace just giving all I am to the one who allows me air in these lungs and holds the key to my eternal soul.  All the while allowing and feeding from the fruits of His spirit to grow within.

 

Him, Jesus yes, the one that has been holding me my entire existence all the while I am working on patients for as long as I can remember. 

Knowing everyone needs to be careful about what they ask for. 

As I know over the years, I absolutely learned to stop asking to learn patience.   

Just as I have been asking to reflect caution and boundaries for what I have been known to have is a heart.

 

Too big and not enough judgement I guess was a blessing and a curse.  Naturally blessed with kindness and good spirits to share; along with love feeding my own need while I without caution love people for who they are.   Feeding my own needs through outreach, and genuine care.

Peace yes reading down the list of those Fruits of the Spirit;  I work on the peace thing cause everyone that knows me.  Knows how I sometime get excited over stuff.

Yet no matter if that excitement is worry or just plain happiness for someone or something.

I truly have been blessed with the spirit of self-control especially as I grow forward with Christ.      

Oh, but there are still moments when I reflect if I could have known then what I know now!

Sometimes no other words are needed to describe how blessed and fortunate we become when we find our way and walk in obedience and truth with all that God is, was and will be.

Even on those days when you know you are dealing with people, places and things not always on the up and up or a fit to be anywhere near what you want to be at.

Anyway, for those who would like to know what the Fruits of the spirt they are.

 Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control.

  I can give you the various verses where to read up on them but one thing I have learned is we do not really get it or appreciate things unless we do the work for something ourselves.  

That includes especially growing forward with God and really knowing Him through His Son Jesus Christ.

Joy I can say is not that excitement of buying something new that you think you have always wanted.  

 It is that deep lasting, fulfilling harmony that fills your spirit with everything bundled into one. Leaving us with such great peace you cannot explain why you would ever deserve it.

 

Yes, Joy can berobbed from us!  Heck yes, daily especially in the world we have today.  Where everyone is trying to prove their points, everyone is trying to be in control, and when something goes wrong it seems to all lead back to hate and anger of some sort.

Not to mention when you are genuine and you really believe in people, to find out they are not who you think they are. 

Or when they are who you know they are, but they do things for reasons outside of what they are tapping into you for.

 

Yes, I know that rabbit hole opened up and that could go on a long spiraling adventure we start talking about why we do the things we do.

 

Yes, sometimes just our own choices point blank and those others where we convince ourselves and we believe in others.   Hoping for an expectation even if unplanned but just deep within the veins knowing how much we think we need or want the outcome.

 We even with all the danger signs we convince ourselves to believe in all that is good for anything they are doing, saying or we are doing for them.

Only to later find out nothing was as it was painted in that picture in our minds.

We find out just how selfish their ambitions sometimes really are. And we are left to beat ourselves up and try to get back up for thinking with that big ole heart for the 100^th time.

Enough there, Because I can say Trust me, I have had to pray allot over the years for acting out of my heart and not paying attention to common sense.     Letting go of souls you have become connected is a bittersweet ride.

 

However, God has blessed me with the fruit of the spirit to continue to love and for this I am grateful for every soul that crosses my path. 

I will never understand the reasons why I am loved and taught by Him with so many various lessons in this life. 

Long before I ever started walking with Jesus, I believed there was a God of the universe.    Even if I never knew what that meant or who He was.

I used to believe all the challenges I was allowed to grow through were just tests to see if I still believed in something better.

 

Even when I never really knew what better could mean.

 

I will always believe everything happens for a reason.

 I just stopped chasing what that is years ago. Stopped trying to solve for better reasons or any reason that would make sense why so many things happen to, around or with anyone I am connected that are hurtful and crushing moments in life.

Stop trying to figure out why or why not.   I struggled for a long time trying to fill gaps and find resolve. 

Tried so long to figure out what my purpose of even existence was or should be.

 

I am not sure I ever really did. But I stopped chasing it long ago. 

Finding my worth in, with, and through Jesus Christ was the biggest life blessing I could have ever had and will be where I will stay in my believes and actions for any remaining days I have in the here and now.

That is where the greatest unexplainable peace fills any gap or crevasse, I may have ever fallen into along this journey.

It does not make me perfect for the world or even times in my world.

 It does not have to.  

I will leave that blind faith and all the peace of holding onto hope to the God that holds the universe.

Crave, desire, want absolutely.   I will never stop wanting that one and only; to be loved from the outside in as deeply as the love I have been blessed from the inside out.

But even if I am wrong in walking in obedience and holding onto that moral compass daily and just believing there is always something better with Jesus. 

The only thing I have to lose is the shortened time of being in and of the world.   For all the peace, all the health and well being I have been given by not just doing what is so easily available.

Even if I die on my own in this world that you  can be surrounded by billions and still very alone.  I now with God I may fight feeling lonely and wanting to just be held in someone’s hands, someone’s heart the depths of someone’s soul.   But I will never be alone.

The peace and gift of life I have been given to have my own strong will and ability to know the choices I make matter.   As everyone in this universe.

That alone outweighs all the missing, broken human promises of any world.  Or any let downs and losses thanks to just how things and people are these days.

However, with that being said out loud and this day ahead.

Thank you, Lord, for another new day,  Father please lead and guide me and all I am connected through any storm and teach us how to be selfless in shining forward your light and your will.

Heal all who are feeling the pains of being stepped on by those who just do not get you.  Or even those who do that are on the edge about to lose their way.

Guide and comfort us Jesus through all the uncertainty ahead.

Thank you, Lord, for all that You are teaching me.

How to cling even tighter to you is something I never want to forget!

Guide and protect and heal the ways that are of untruth and just lost.  

Father God please heal or remove all that is not of you with me, or all I am connected.

Thank you for this day, this week, and this journey. 

 May we all come to your table?   May we all love as you loved us?    It is a question only each of us can step up and answer.

For you will always be there waiting with arms wide open.  

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalms 23:1-4 (NIRV) A psalm of David.

¹ The Lord is my shepherd. He gives me everything I need.

²     He lets me lie down in fields of green grass.  He leads me beside quiet waters.
³     He gives me new strength.  He guides me in the right paths for the honor of his name.
⁴ Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid. You are with me.
Your shepherd’s rod and staff comfort me.

 

2 Corinthians 4:16-17 (NIRV)  

¹⁶ We don’t give up. Our bodies are becoming weaker and weaker. But our spirits are being renewed day by day.

 ¹⁷ Our troubles are small. They last only for a short time. But they are earning for us a glory that will last forever. It is greater than all our troubles.

 

Never stop looking up no matter how uncertain or unfair or even unforgivable the world and people become.     Grasp the blessings every second you have them and bury them deep in your soul     

 

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Date: 06/25/2020 Thursday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/KnTE1dlJCFA @ “The Waiting” @Edddie Vedder / Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers

https://youtu.be/9vdkqeshXJM   @ “You Raise Me Up” @Secret Garden

https://youtu.be/n_aVFVveJNs    @ “Trust In You” @Lauren Daigle

https://youtu.be/Wt5X91ciE6Y @ “How Can It Be” @Lauren Daigle

 

 

:5

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Jeremiah 23:24 (AMP) ²⁴ “Can anyone hide himself in secret places
So that I cannot see him?” says the Lord.   “Do I not fill heaven and earth?” says the Lord.

 

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalms 118:24 (AMP) ²⁴ This [day in which God has saved me] is the day which the Lord has made; Let us rejoice and be glad in it.

Psalms 95:2 (AMP)  ² Let us come before His presence with a song of thanksgiving; Let us shout joyfully to Him with songs.’

Zephaniah 3:17 (AMP)  ¹⁷ “The Lord your God is in your midst, A Warrior who saves.   He will rejoice over you with joy; He will be quiet in His love [making no mention of your past sins], He will rejoice over you with shouts of joy.

 

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Oh goodness, the thoughts that pop in this mind maze as soon as I open my eyes.    Smiling as I am blessed again another day.  Despite what aches, what feels empty what needs fixing, what needs changing.

Don’t get it twisted,  comes to mind;
As we should know it is what it is,  that which has been painted on the canvas already.

  That which is just as real. 

But no matter how often we change the color, the results remain the same until your own frame is resolved.  Dig deep in the silence where the truth speaks loudest.

Where the sounds from the waiting and impatience clash loudly, sometimes with the madness of unknown just taunting all that could be while putting all that was back in the faces of what holds the key to change in the world’s reality.

That which makes us so weary, and many times giving up or just doing crazy things trying to make it period.

Our minds make  or break whatever may be next in a split second.  We all get to choose even when we didn’t, we must choose what next.

I want to know what love is.   Oh, the songs and thoughts that fill this vessel.  https://youtu.be/7jC93d_xoEY     @ “I Want To Know What Love Is” @Foreigner

 

Something about having you God who we must find and know it is you that will raise us up eternally.   While the beautiful souls that feed our spirit along the way, filling all our wants, needs and even containing those desires that tend to escape sometimes.

https://youtu.be/GoyE9A7zjko @ “Keeper of My Heart” @Kari Jobe

Something about the songs they bring to our souls and life while trying to put the pieces together in this vast canvas that we are to make and enjoy life.

Raise me up to more than I can be by allowing me to find who we really are created to be.

Together or apart as long as we are with you Jesus!  

For the storms that come around us, through us, from us will always leave their mark.  Yet what we do with the aftermath is what matters most.   

Sometimes Lord, even when we are walking with you all the way.  You just do not move the waters.  Sometimes it is that which is to wash through us to see what abstract distractions await up ahead.

Can we really trust ourselves, when we are given those gifts of other souls in our lives?  Or even just the material things that fill us up and we smile for all that collects dust.

That which we think because others say so that which we allow others to make or break us.

How can it be any other way but you first?

For the mercy and grace, you have given this soul alone.  Despite all inadequacies or feelings of insignificance due to the lack of what you created all of us for from the beginning.

Washing us clean and allowing us to breathe every day we are allowed up.    Walking in obedience is nothing compared to what you have sacrificed for humanity Lord.

Why would I ever want anything that does not have all that you are in it, Jesus?

Everything happens for a reason; I have known this my entire life and at some point, I stopped chasing around trying to figure out what those reasons were supposed to be.

Just to belong, just to be and feel that depth of love that only you can bring only you that will bless.    That forever Agape washing through me.     Love from the outside in through out this world.

 

I am not afraid of what will be for me, my loved one is or even those that are walking in darkness and spreading the hate, and pain along the way.

 

I know you God are in control.   Always will be, always have been with and for all who cling to you.

Peace that indescribable faith that we are filled with no matter what.   Even when the tears do not stop flowing.  Even when we are so broken, we cannot get back up off the floor.

That faith that love that once sweet soul king that fills us with awareness of beyond all time and space leading us through eternity.

God if you are for us who could ever be against us.     If you have allowed me to crave and want so badly I can almost taste what is to come.   Then show me what in my own worldly frame, I need to correct;  I need to allow;   I need to hold as tight as I can to; I need to release back unto you Jesus.

 

Lead me, lead us your children shining brightly along the way for Your will, Your purpose God!     

To wake up next to, in forever love.    Young, old perfectly broken.   Knowing the choices are our own and we get to decide what we want to keep next to us or toss out like yesterday’s newspaper.

Times change us Father, People change.    What once was not matter what we do becomes not enough.    Or we find never really was.      When the truth hurts, we grow forward.    When we never know the truth there is no hope for anything to ever last.

You Lord will never change, never leave us.   While everything in this here and now will always come and go, always fade, always be replaced.

You God will always be.   https://youtu.be/8IFoutAn9w0 @ “You’ve Always Been” @Unspoken

 

Show me what I need to change Father for you alone.  Not for anything or anyone temporary in this world.  

Be with all I am connected and especially those I love and have so much adoration for.   

Protect our children, protect our elders.  Heal what they are going through right here right now.

May our men rise up and lead in love, with you Jesus.    Standing in your love and showing their children right from wrong and knowing there will always be something greater than what this world is.

Be today’s modern-day revolution on the way or just disgustingly corrupt souls that have made their way to positions that will destroy this world.

Lord it starts with each one of us. 

You did not give us life to stand by and watch the darkness drown us in  what we think will fix it.   Your actions give us love and life to work in obedience, faith, and unity to make a difference. 

May we all hear the Gods whispers and direction.   May we find that deep peace even when we are filled with brokenness, doubt, or even hope.    For He alone will lead us to beautiful places and still waters that calm our souls.

May we learn who we are in you and stand in your love Jesus no matter what that looks like. As long as we know our fears have no chance in hell when we walk and stand on your love Jesus!   https://youtu.be/1T2tMt0Ky6g @ “Stand In Your Love” @Josh Baldwin

Thank you for this day and all the crazy thoughts firing.   Thank you for allowing me up, moving slowly and

 

 

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Date: 06/24/2020 Wednesday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/8Uw8mIcQJn8 @ “Pieces” @Red

https://youtu.be/HYKRp01qwj0  @ “Those Who Love The Real You” @Fearless Soul

https://youtu.be/6qUPAI-VVhY  @ “Crushing Snakes” @”Passion ft. Crowder, TAYA

https://youtu.be/2--lQNNj6og  @ “Hello Future” @TobyMac ft. CROWDER

 https://youtu.be/AzZC3EbH6iE  @ “Gracefully Broken” @Tasha Cobbs Leonard

:5

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

2 Thessalonians 3:3 (AMP) ³ But the Lord is faithful, and He will strengthen you [setting you on a firm foundation] and will protect and guard you from the evil one.

Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

John 15:5-7 (AMP) ^5 [a]I am the Vine; you are the branches. The one who remains in Me and I in him bears much fruit, for [otherwise] apart from Me [that is, cut off from vital union with Me] you can do nothing. ⁶ If anyone does not remain in Me, he is thrown out like a [broken off] branch, and withers and dies; and they gather such branches and throw them into the fire, and they are burned. ⁷ If you remain in Me and My words remain in you [that is, if we are vitally united and My message lives in your heart], ask whatever you wish and it will be done for you.
.

Isaiah 41:10 (AMP)     ¹⁰ ‘Do not fear [anything], for I am with you;
Do not be afraid, for I am your God.   I will strengthen you, be assured I will help you;
I will certainly take hold of you with My righteous right hand [a hand of justice, of power, of victory, of salvation].’

Psalms 62:5-6 (AMP)   ⁵ For God alone my soul waits in silence and quietly submits to Him, For my hope is from Him.  ⁶ He only is my rock and my salvation; My fortress and my defense, I will not be shaken or discouraged.     

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Thank you, Lord, for allowing me up another day.  Actually, wide awake before any of the alarms start going off reminding me of so many, I wish I could just go hug right now.

Thank you for the moments sorting through the silence as I dive into your word.

 

Knowing once I am up where all the noise and distractions take over, the spin will start again.  Competing for this or that, Agenda’s, wishful thoughts, or even the needs of that which surrounds me.

Thank you for the ability to tune out moments in time with you

Thank you for allowing me to dream and imagine. 

Thank you for those who I am connected.

Thank you for allowing me to know who I am in you Jesus.

As time presses on and I finally start this day.

Knowing I am blessed as the hot water washes over me, reminding me just how blessed I am, no matter what storm, what pains.

No matter what I feel I care for,  no matter what I have or do not have.  

I am still here and now.    With a shelter I have been allowed to acquire, hot steaming water for whatever the need, air in the heat and heat in the cool.

As the sweet scent of Japanese Cherry blossoms spreads over me and I pull this hair up.    I know it is the simple things that we take for granted that really matter most.  Even when I myself do not acknowledge the thanks and remembering those who cannot even brush their teeth much less have some minor extras.

Those visions of something different, those desires of who we long to be side by side or even those which just to see them once.  Those things that new lotion, clothing, item for the home. Or even the basic necessities we do not realize how much we miss until there are none.

How this vast world of realities are blessings from you God.

Be it out there in the worlds view making a difference, planting seeds as we shine bright or just that what sets my soul on fire or makes my heart smile.

 God what is it that I need to prepare for?   Awakened by the earth shaken and collapsing yesterday,  jumping up with mother as if she called my name, then those thoughts of love teasing and knocking at my door.   What is it I need to know?  What is it I need to do?  What is it I need to be?

You Jesus, know better than anything or anyone of this world that I am never scripted, maybe sometimes a routine I have fallen in.   Or one I am running away from. 

Absolutely unsure what I am or am to do with what you allow me each day. 

Not dwelling, as each moment with you just allows me to breathe and acknowledge what it could be like without.

Knowing there has to be so much more than just surviving, just going through the motions.   Just proving to those who once my number is no longer called, I will be easily replaced.

More than knowing just how insignificant time or actions can really be.  Or is it a blessing when we find you Lord.  When we finally understand who we are in you, we know just how blessed we truly are.

I am nothing in or to this world without you.  Maybe a game piece, maybe something to be tossed out once used up.  Discarded before ever even knowing how to crawl, must less all the paths I took trying to find my way when I was walking through this journey in life.

Cautious, shutdown, spending all my now time with you Lord in my dreams, or looking up at the clouds.

Playing it safe, or just too scared to really believe.    Not that strange as it may seem.

Gratefully blessed that you allow Always Me!

Be with all that is in the depths of this soul, this heart Jesus.   Hear even the unspoken cries, healing  and directing all they can be.

Prayers for connections yes, friends yes and absolutely my family!

More than just the pieces that are rearranged any given day.  God this world and all I am connected need you in a might way.

Pieces of me, be it broken or just moved around.   Lord all I am belongs to you.    I surrendered long ago.   You know the love I carry even if I may never be allowed near where I long to go.

No matter if I am onto of the mountain with you or broken laying naked on the floor. Once I opened that door asking what you want from me, what am I in existence for.

Finally eyes wide open, just knowing it is you, and that power that raises me up daily.   Even when I am unable to move stuck in confusion, back peddling trying to remain safe.    Knowing if I cannot see it, it does not exist without a trace.

Yet, I do not need to understand  even when pushing  back.  You God would not allow anything to cross this heart or even be thoughts that start.   Unless you have something, you wish for me to do, experience, or share me in part.   

No matter where the pieces of me end up, or even start.  Lord may your love be all that will be always.

Guide these words, these actions.   Never let me go!  With it being you, they see.

Hear all who are reaching out to you Father God, show them the same blessings and grace you have shown me over these years.

Heal those hurting physically, emotionally.  Heal and reconcile all back to you Father.    Forgive me for all that which should have never been.  

Accept the forgiveness that I have for all that which this life has been marked with.  Forgive me for making something out of things that should not be, but more importantly forgive me where I cannot trust and believe.

Prayers for my family for healing and may they have the courage and strength to know and walk with you.   

 

Thank you for loving me as I know I try block or run from.  That which I do not understand shutting down,  long before anything starts just so I do not risk feeling maybe wasting time, being hurt.  Knowing the scars run deep like that which flows through this earth.

Thank you, Jesus, as I am forever grateful and forever yours.   Mold me, Lead me, I am nothing without you.  Show me where and who I am meant to be.

Heal this land Father God, show us how Lord! 

https://youtu.be/TleYjvNqKGo  @ “The Potters Hand” @HillSong Worship

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Date: 06/23/2020 Tuesday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/E5bAawsa7_s @ “Just Breathe” @Pearl Jam

https://youtu.be/_h_XGHb4p1s  @ “Horizon” @TobyMac

https://youtu.be/KSOtCMYJqOw  @ “I Want To Know What Love Is” @”Foreigner

https://youtu.be/sq233lM3k9w  @ “This We Know” @Vertical Worship

https://youtu.be/zfLcdBuB7NY  @ “Here Again” @Elevation Worship

21 / :5

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Isaiah 40:31 (AMP)     
³¹ But those who wait for the Lord [who expect, look for, and hope in Him]
Will gain new strength and renew their power;  They will lift up their wings [and rise up close to God] like eagles [rising toward the sun]; They will run and not become weary, They will walk and not grow tired.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

As I look up as each morning you allow me up and out the door.   Seeing that beautiful promise of each new day that awaits on the horizon.

Jesus Thank you!  I know I do not post pictures or rarely reflecting the pieces of time that touch this soul even when I share them out on social media.  However, if I could paint the picture of what truly flows through when I look up and see God’s promise of love, hope and ever after,  the canvas would never be big enough to capture His beauty and love.     Sometimes I feel like I am on the outside looking in knowing this world is not my home.   

But looking through the eyes of God, love has all the darkness and unrest surrounded.   All that is confused and fighting, dangerous and lost.   Stuck in the middle like a fallen insect into the ants’ nest.  The violence maybe brutal with the misfortune of innocence sacrificed but, in the end, Love will wash through and wash away all that is dark and broken.  In the end only love matters where truth, purity and all that God intended when he allowed us to be.

No matter what I feel, no matter who I desire, run from, or someday run to.   God will always  lead the way because now that I found who my father really is.  This little girl will never stop dreaming,  all the while I am holding tight to his robe and finger walking through this life.     Knowing when I am down even if I do not make it; His arms will forever hold me tight allowing me to just breathe until I see the other side.  For sure I will never hide in what use to control this life.   

Even if that looks like I run and hide behind the peace He alone has given me.   Healing has never been so great for those who call upon His name.

On this new day allowed, the love that flows through the dreams with eyes wide open.  Growing forward chiseling in each time I start to slip.      Imagination doing overtime but deep inside faith in abundance for I know what I can never fully describe.

Thank you, Jesus, for giving me one more day of opportunities. Broken, aging, blessed beyond anything this world has or will give.

May be my happy ever after is just allowing the love you God have filled deep within this soul, to flow to whoever you allow me to connect even when I cannot touch.  Lord only knows I gave up so long ago; yet you keep allowing me to get back up.  You keep allowing me to share so much.  Even when I do not have any other explanation where it comes from.

I trust you Jesus; your ways are so much higher than my own. 

I will never be enough and if I let my journey remind me, I will always be insignificant.    Always just wanting to be held, just needing you to meet me here again.   Meet me and never leave.    Love so pure, no expectations but to just believe.

More than anything physical could ever temporarily be.    From the deepest parts of this soul the Lord holds all that is that will never go away.

For this forever blessed, never able to see any other way.   So, if I seem to have let go, it is only because I am unable to make you in the world understand unless you are real, unless you are with me in and with Christ.   All I want is all you are but there can be no other way.     Forever I will have you in my dreams, forever that someday.

He has saved me from the elements and from myself long ago.  Life is never fair, and it was never promised so.  On somedays it is still hard to get up hard to swallow.  But deeply knowing through all my attempts and failing to matter.   It was God alone who made it clear He alone holds all the cards.   What next and all the beginnings that will start when something else comes to an end.

Six feet may not look so bad when the world is spinning so out of control even when we are stopped.    Just know it is the one King who will give the peace that nothing else can ever release.

I ask the question that I was presented with while reading @Oswald Chambers “Hope A Holy Promise”   “Do I have enough Hope in God to not do anything even though it seems as if something must be done?”      Do we have enough Hope in God?

Only each one of us to ourselves or to all who come in our path can answer that question.

It is so hard to not just try and make it happen, quit, fix it, whatever we do to get through.   So easy to just be like the world and fit in until we do not.

But we are all made for so much more.  We are made for and to love no matter what that looks like.    More than that physical bond with your forever to puppy hugs each morning they come out to start the day.     God is beyond anything we can or will ever be able to fully comprehend.

If you do not know him personally or if you have given up and walked away because some where along the line humanity had their own take and rules on what being the church should be.    How we should treat others or what we should tolerate to be a good Christian.

I can assure you though we are the hands and feet of Jesus when we truly let Him in.   It is more than rules or cult regulations.      Love above all else, respect starts within, obedience never doing works to mean something.  You can not work you way to heaven, you cannot get there through anyone from here.

Yes, those who genuinely believe who call out in prayer are His greatest intercessors.    However, God needs you to come to him.   He is at the door, let Him in right where you are.   Talk with Him every day once, twice or 24hours always.

Challenge what others are teaching, dive into the bible learning what each verse means and is saying.    Love yourself to not be lost forever.  

None of us get it right but when we are called in truth it makes it easy to just want to see the world with Gods’ end in sight.    

Thank you Father for each day you allow me up, for each new day you allow me to share Your promise and even that of me keeping it real no matter how humiliated, embarrassed loved or even insignificant I feel.

Eyes wide open or wide shut.    All that flows from these veins is pure, even if half the time I falter not really knowing what to do.

Bless and heal this world Jesus through all you have called upon.   Show us how to stay safe while making this world better than okay.    Wash over all who are lost, soften their hearts, bring them to their knees before the throne.   Heal what has made them who they are.    All that are on self-destruct mode and the world is at risk of harm.

Man made viruses that have crippled this world, losses and pain will never be as much as what you have done and went through so we could know who you are.

Lord may we shine on for and with you.   Show us the way.   Please bless all my family, all my friends, all my connections.    In truth with and for you.

 Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalms 52:8 (AMP)
⁸ But as for me, I am like a green olive tree in the house of God;
I trust [confidently] in the lovingkindness of God forever and ever.

Deuteronomy 31:6 (AMP)     
⁶ Be strong and courageous, do not be afraid or tremble in dread before them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not fail you or abandon you.”

Ephesians 4:30 (AMP)     
³⁰ And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God [but seek to please Him], by whom you were sealed and marked [branded as God’s own] for the day of redemption [the final deliverance from the consequences of sin].

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Reality

You can have all of my dreams.  All my desires. All of my hopes even if they are wilting at times like flowers.

Use my words find your way

But never will you have all of me if you don’t show up or really forever stay

I love you for you. Not a persona or what  for the world can do.

Awe the sweetness when my heart smiles just thinking of you.

I’ve always been if it’s not real it’s not happening girl

Just these days blessed with choice clean hands and A pure heart

But you knew that from the start. 

So how much of me do you really want all or nothing it will not matter

My heart will forever smile something it’s been a while.    Forever my sweet friend I want to need and use your love to the end

But I have never been good at games and reality won’t let me pretend

Love me hate me want me to the end.

Just show up in truth forever love  as soon as you can.

This is what it is.  Until it is not.   

I want to be loved like that forever with all I got. 

No fun no games no show or picture frames

I know who I am I want to know you no matter what you are or are not.

But first you have to be real and show up  forever mine or just a friendship forever life is what it is until it’s not.

You can have all of my dreams.  All my desires. All of my hopes even if they are wilting at times like flowers.

Use my words find your way   Use me up while I watch you play

No matter what in truth we will always be okay.

============================================

Date: 06/22/2020 Monday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/MrHxhQPOO2c  @ “I Can See Clearly Now” @Jimmy Cliff

https://youtu.be/ind7BEZgWJU @ “Three Little Birds” @Bob Marley

https://youtu.be/cq6Eka8YHTY  @ “One Love” @Bob Marley

https://youtu.be/I6n9XukESdc   @ “Here And Now” @byPaul Baloche

2:11 / 27:51

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Psalm 121:7-8 (AMP)     ⁷ The Lord will protect you from all evil;
He will keep your life.  ⁸ The Lord will guard your going out and your coming in [everything that you do] From this time forth and forever.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Still Learning!   No matter what we must remain teachable each day we are given movement.  Each day I am allowed up I am still learning something new of the world, souls in it and even myself.

As I start each day knowing if I do not start with God first, my day is just rushed, or falling behind depending on how I jumped up to take off running.  Either way the day is in a day of angst robbing that peace.   When things occur, work, life and losing balance.  It is like being trapped with a perfect storm deep inside.

My thoughts out loud of why I talk about God daily,  because I am blessed, not because I am forcing anything, or that I am perfect.  The thought alone makes me laugh.

 I talk about Jesus because He with  God’s perfect plan is what fills me with Peace and  that which fills me and us up with Mercy and Grace. 

 That which we  do not give ourselves or those that come and go through out our lives.

For me in most cases, being a result-oriented person, it is one extreme to another.   Really great and productive results, or one more negative result to add up to the mountain already blocking my view. 

This morning To Die For that Sam Smith tune, just kept coming back to this mind and I know this song touches me deeply knowing how all my life I have just had that want to belong, and to know now what I didn’t know back then.    

 The things we do wanting to just be loved, either chasing and giving who we are away or burying ourselves in the business of our careers or talents and not being who we really are deep inside.

Today tough thinking how God himself gave his only son to die for us; and wondering what that feels like with a world of billions over and over, where humanity continually rejects His Love.

Humanity allows those mountains filling the path with land minds and exploding volcanoes with all the lies, all of what hurts, all of what can be dark.

Not everyone gets to pick the battles they find themselves in the middle of.   

Some of us slowly create our own.   

Sometimes we do not know the person we have known all our lives.   Or even that one that we said we will spend the rest of our lives with.

 

Sometimes they turn out to be more than we could have ever imagined; other times we find we are trapped right in Satan’s den.

Life happens I know I rattle about playing in Satan’s sandbox and how we will end up very dirty and broken.   

 Truth is in many cases, we are so dissolution and wandering freely we never even pay attention we are playing in it.

Never do we need to purpose to end up there willingly walking into the playground.   Satan is good with the facade's and lies of the world.

But even though that is a true statement it is too deep for me to go there right now.  

My thoughts around the facts we are all not born in this world in that comfort and loving family unit.  

Sometimes we are born right in the middle of war zones.   Wars were hate and violence are the only means of survival.    

Where all anyone knows from decades of legacy is that trust is not an option, sleep breeds new pains and family is whoever has your back.

No matter where we come from, no matter where we have been or even what we have done.

The opportunity is up to you to believe in the one who created all of us and know that we all get to choose.    We all get to choose what we will do with any new days we are given.

We all get to work through growing forward in life and ask God to fill us with healing, with peace with love.

I know I was never around when he spoke this universe into life. 

 But I do not think he would have ever sat there singing I just want to die for someone so I can have a universe that is so self-righteous and hateful I can watch my son Jesus be crucified over and over being they did not accept it the first round.

 

Yes, just those random thoughts I am allowed to release out of  a mind maze that is surely full of twists and turns and lots of experiences.

Thankfully even if some do not agree; I have not totally went crazy yet although there are days I just want to go.

So I say this, I have always believed in God, but it was never until I took the steps to know who Jesus really was and what that meant that I found myself stop asking what my purpose in life is.

Do I still question or speak about my insignificance?   I am sure I will the rest of my life when I am overwhelmed by my own unanswered questions or unfulfilled desires.

It is heart matter to choose to walk the walk or dedicate who and what you can to help others and still see great loss.

But I know God is in control and I absolutely know where I am going in the end.  I can see that very clearly of what matters and what does not for my life.

Struggle with boundaries that makes me laugh out loud.  Although I am very disciplined, I always get too close to the fire.

I cannot ever say I do not know where my kids get it; after all I am the one that says you will never know until you try.  And if it is going to give you quality of life you must try at least once.  

Which makes me realize not everyone has the same idea of what is quality.  

Different topic for different day. 

  I can get sidetracked really quick on that.  But like Bob Marley sings.  And that soulful reggae music takes you to places that just help you relax and find those happy places. 

 Don’t Worry!   Every little thing will always be alright especially walking with the one that took on more pain, sorrow, torment, and brokenness than we could ever experience.

Life is what it is until it is not!  If the Good Lord breathes air in your lungs one more day.  

Make it count, get out and shine bright planting the positive seeds even if in the sand.  The vultures and thieves of this here and now world cannot get to all of them.  At some point the sun you shine will help someone else grow.

 

I smile because I know to whom in the end I belong.  Besides, I love making people wonder.  Especially anyone who thinks they have me all figured out.  I used to say if you took everything I have ever written in my life, took my resume for all that I have crammed in this little head.    You would get super lost.  

Life is what it is!   We get to choose.   We choose to hold on and dream or let it all go and find something different.    In any case whatever is happening or not happening is because of the choices you have made or need to make.    We need to embrace the life we are given.  Always try and succeed where you can doing your best in whatever you are given to work with!

So, on this Monday readying for a long workday starting at the cross and coming back out with some Marley.    Let’s feel alright.   Shake it off.  Whatever is in complete, whatever is heavy, whatever you just have to wait.   Give it to God and shake everything else off.   

No matter what we have going on or what we are going through.  Praise the one who gives you life, who gave you love, who allows us to choose even if we are unable to see the expectations, we have deep inside that agenda box.

Truth everyone knows is we do not have to have any of even a glimpse of what we have able to still get up and talk about.    Yes, things can get better, or worse!

Just be thankful and make every second count for what you have right here right now.

https://youtu.be/KEGJ22cNopU @ “6/22/2020 Perspectives with Kelly” @AlwaysMeKelly | PiecesOfMeOverTime

 Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Psalm 116:17 (AMP)
¹⁷ I will offer to You the sacrifice of thanksgiving,
And will call on the name of the Lord.

     

Philippians 4:4-6 (AMP)     
⁴ Rejoice in the Lord always [delight, take pleasure in Him]; again I will say, rejoice! ⁵ Let your gentle spirit [your graciousness, unselfishness, mercy, tolerance, and patience] be known to all people. The Lord is near. ⁶ Do not be anxious or worried about anything, but in everything [every circumstance and situation] by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, continue to make your [specific] requests known to God

 

============================================

Well Thanks @TMac.  Sparking some thought around your afternoon #SpeakLife  “Trust that an ending is followed by a beginning”    Yes, the cycle of all things to start must always have an ending.   Sometimes things end because of all things starting.   Life balance process.  Just super blessed God closed some doors opened more, but more importantly opened the narrow gate with Him and allows me to walk with him. 

Whatever comes or goes since coming up out of the water and keeping Him close daily.   Does not necessarily hurt when it does work out as bad as it once did when all I had was what the world offered.

Thinking may people will take and twist things to make what their feeling not hurt as much.   Sometimes we justify what others say to fit our needs.

Bottom line is back to choices all equate to beginnings and endings.  No matter what is, or what is not.    Feeling good at the end of the day helps you sleep.   But did you really make the choice for yourself?

Beautiful things come to life out of the ashes. https://youtu.be/lqbjHOfwKwE “Beauty For Ashes” @byLive Worship Mid-Cities Worship

   Only if you allow God to heal your dry bones https://youtu.be/0P4YdXz3LAI  “Come Alive (Dry Bones)” @Laruen Daigle   So, rise up no matter how many times you get knocked down, deflated, or have to hold on loosely because  you walk with clean hands and a pure heart. https://youtu.be/wcG9_bPR1_o  @ “Rise Up” @Andra Day

 

 Just those thoughts at it again.   At least the one’s that speak life that I can release.

============================================

 

Date: 06/21/2020 Sunday

Soul Vibes and Starters (YouTube.Com)

Lord the songs that pop in this head  or the vibes that keep me moving.  Thank you!  

https://youtu.be/RVhJ46Pyjr8  @ “Back To Basics” @New Life Christian Church

https://youtu.be/RctWcSC6QNE @ “Faithful” @Sarah Reeves

https://youtu.be/dUpKZz0Nm7c  @ “Peace Be Still” @The Belonging ft. Lauren Daigle

https://youtu.be/YPyfTjgB_0k    @ “What A Beautiful Name | Miracles | Fill Me Up” @#Venture9 #WhatABeautifulName #WorshipMob

2:11 / 27:51

Biblegateway.com (DAILY VERSE)

Psalm 91:1 (AMP)     

Security of the One Who Trusts in the Lord.

91 He who ^[a]dwells in the shelter of the Most High Will remain secure and rest in the shadow of the Almighty [whose power no enemy can withstand].

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Well Father here I am up again, mind you before I wanted to; but allowing pets in the house someone needs to step up and care for them when they are ready to get up and out.    Feeling like I need to be stretched every way possible, as this fifty something body hardly working anything these days took on that twenty something year old mind working on painting this house.

It is therapy for sure, just unlike the last one I did what ten or eleven years ago.   Absolutely lets me know I am still alive.

There is something about the therapy in painting even if the thought of doing a three-bedroom, two car garage home myself these days is absolutely a crazy project to remember once done.

No, I have decided I will need help once I get to the point to all those peaks.   But I can do as far as I can reach.  Be it takes a month a year however long Father.   

One brush stroke at a time wipes away all that is insignificant, all that should have never been, all that the burning deep within craves needs to be put away until the day I can openly get out here and serve you again Jesus.

Nothing else matters.  Though well meaning, good intention and fully alive.    With absolutely a pure heart and clean hands.   Today, tomorrow any realities thereafter.

Thank you for this day, and all that is beautiful.

Seeking to meet you in timelessness, needed you then in great adoration need you now, need you forever!   This is my story given moments in this world where one second, we are at the top of the world forgetting what and who is important and the next digging out of what we do not understand or could never find.

You give many chances in and through you Father God for reconciliation of all that is beautiful.  All that once it is gone it is done.

You allow nothing without reason.  Even if we get confused with the freedoms and choices allowed.   Making a mess becoming lost in what you own and want found.

Be it me or any of those beautiful souls in this vast universe.   We are all one!  Your beautiful creations with promise, visions, melodies, and scripts yet to be written or found.

As I am listening and tapping out the overwhelming feeling of gratitude remember the times, I have been able to stand on that stage with my brothers and sisters in Christ and praise you.   The moments  I have been able to sing beautiful name with my beautiful sisters Lindsey and Megan in harmony and just all you are God washing through me.

Times may have changed who and where I worship with, but I know just as we choose to be, do, or allow to consume us.    No matter where I am Father God let it be it you that always consumes and leads me.

Happy Father’s day God!   Thank you for never giving up on me wandering in this jungle with all the predators and broken hearts.     In a world where you must stand for something, where you must either lead or follow because in the middle you are trapped and caught up in this vast game of chess.

Only difference when you are a pawn the pains are far more scaring than just being knocked off the board.

Your name alone Jesus with so much power, grandeur and promise allows us life, to love, laugh and live.   Never giving up on us even when we take that left when it should have been right.

Father God, reconcile all to you first and then exactly where you want them, want us to be.    I believe in you more than I can even believe in myself Father.     The one who loves this orphan unconditionally.    No matter what crazy worldly dreams and thoughts spawn through the veins that give me life.

No brokenness from what I can do or others I care for will do.     Thank you for allowing me to worship you no matter where I am.    I pray for that day when I can get back up there and harmonize with my sisters and brothers with and for you.    Leading me and others to the cross.   Washing through us, softening hearts, healing all that is broken.

Lord all that I am is yours.  Heal my family from all the ailments and elements that are beating down the door.

All my connections their hearts open wide to you filling them up with your light to shine on for so many they touch.  May those that once were filling the huge stadiums and buildings remember it is because of you they exist at all.

Change the hearts of those that can never have enough, get enough or even those that fight to understand why they will never be enough.   

Protect and guard us and let nothing we do be in vain, but reflect love, hope, mercy, and grace

May all I am connected come to know your precious love Jesus of what it feels like to be loved from the inside out.   

Lord, forgive me for how I lately want so much; thank you for allowing me to not just go react to what I have craved my entire life.    Just to belong!   You see, you hear, you know all that is in my heart, all that is in all the hearts and souls of every living being here and now.

Are we all just wandering in the desert again  or still I am not sure Father God.  But this nation is so lost, I am so lost.

I will never be able to do this on my own.   Many things this once skinny little white girl could take on and do.   So many things off the bucket list to just reflect in this invisible check list.

Nothing compares Father to the abundant blessing that I will ever be able to explain.  But the peace and comfort.  Even when I see through, when I pick up, when I am face down crying out.

Thank you for loving me; and teaching me to love myself for who I am.  May the world know such peace?

 Meditation Opportunities (Biblegateway.com): (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TBT-The Passion Translation)

Micah 7:7 (AMP) God Is the Source of Salvation and Light

⁷ But as for me, I will look expectantly for the Lord and with confidence in Him I will keep watch; I will wait [with confident expectation] for the God of my salvation.
My God will hear me.

     

Revelation 1:8 (AMP)     ⁸ “I am the ^[a]Alpha and the Omega [the Beginning and the End],” says the Lord God, “Who is [existing forever] and Who was [continually existing in the past] and Who is to come, the Almighty [the Omnipotent, the Ruler of all].”

 

 

Numbers 6:24-26 (AMP)     ²⁴ The Lord bless you, and keep you [protect you, sustain you, and guard you]; ²⁵ The Lord make His face shine upon you [with favor],
And be gracious to you [surrounding you with lovingkindness];

²⁶ The Lord lift up His countenance (face) upon you [with divine approval],
And give you peace [a tranquil heart and life].’

—————————— afternoon thoughts—————————

Best thing about being real.  Pure heart, clean hands and raw truth.   Love, Hate  it’s your choice.     Me I choose to share pieces of me over time from this soul.   No matter what the pain or burning desires are churning from the depths inside.

Touch my heart, touch my soul, hold me tight never letting go.   All in Gods been then, now and forever will be.   Take it all but know without Him.   You will never be set free. Without Him you will never really have me.