Music pulled
from https://www.youtube.com/ and
are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted
otherwise and are free for public
consumption**** (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King
James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)
Date: Tuesday, April 13,
2021
@CS Lewis [Inklings] “What I owe is incalculable. Is there any pleasure on earth as great as a
circle of Christian friends by a good fire?”
Soul Vibes / Motivation Movers (YouTube.Com)
Where Is The Love @Black Eyed Peas
Hello Future @TobyMac & The Diverse City Band Live
2019
Meditation
Opportunities
23 for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, 24 and all are justified freely by his grace through the
redemption that came by Christ Jesus.
(@Jesus Calling 365 Devotions with Real-Life
Stories @Sarah Young)
“Moreover, you are
richly blessed when you walk trustingly with Me through the routines of your
day.”
Colossians 3:23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your
heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.
John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will
bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
John 15:5 “I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will
bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”
Psalm
105:4 Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his
face always.
Daily
Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (Thinking out loud)
Oh,
I did it again trying to finish this series I am watching. Got my tired self of no sleep just how many
of us get caught up. Not doing anything
wrong, not having any intentions but to just get through, be or do something
that seems so harmless. Reminding me of
how guilt by association even if we are not doing anything can pretty much
destroy us or leave us in the bounds of unknown.
Death
come for us all so we should not fear the future. However, like those vampire diaries and the
theory, theme, or script; whatever way you refer to it. If you are in the darkness eventually
something or someone gets to you. If you
are in the wrong place at the wrong time something or someone changes you
forever. If you are allowed to survive
you struggle with the darkness and light the remainder of the journey you
have. Choices, changes and those we
make or those we need to.
Loving
all the wrong people is not the question.
It is why do you love that someone.
What are you getting for it or from it? Yes, I believe that souls can connect
without ever even seeing someone. However,
what is it that drives you to do what you do?
What is it or why is it; that you tolerate or even participate in bad
behaviors, disrespect of others, or more importantly yourself?
Is
it the rush like a party with all your favorite people or that status you will
get when all those selfies are going across the network because you are with or
near someone with a certain celebrity status?
What does that mean anyway?
As we look around and watch and read how many that have that worldly status
are suddenly dying all around us without even notice.
Those
with great talents on the screen, on a stage or even the unspoken loved ones
until suddenly all that is left is to talk about what was because for whatever
the reason they are no more.
Where
is all this coming from. Who knows when
you run on little to know sleep because of binge watching as an excuse because
the choices you make have made you realize no matter how much your raised up
your loved ones to do your best, to always know guilt by association is
probably the number one destructive thing in humanity? Because we open up, we care, we want we surround
ourselves with those that do even if we do not do with intentions of personal gain;
we subconsciously get something just by being.
The
hold of an abuser on its victim is unspoken.
Those who stay with someone who uses, abuses and even in some cases
bring them near to death over and over.
While the victim can get away, they do not want to risk being alone. So even if they do get away from one they
tend to repeat history with just a different shape, or size maybe even color
yet the same personality and/or tendencies those before them had.
Yes,
that I should know I spent my entire youth searching for someone to love me for
me forever and always be with me. Yet
because of my strong will and independence that I never asked for. I would fight back and move on not taking anything
once I realized It was not healthy and nothing would change. Perhaps one of the reasons when I finally
fell in love with Jesus who is the everything and unchanging.
I
just wish every soul could really meet him before going through the brokenness that
comes in life. I never picked where I am
today. In fact, as a young girl had
that Ozzy and Harriett white picket kind of fence life in my head. Not perfect not even black and white; just
that which is only in the movies or like I once told my mother when she asked
when I would settle down. Love and
relationships are like the lotto; you have to play to win and sometimes no
matter how many times you play if its Gods will you have that winning
relationship where that other person will stick with you and for you no matter
what and never purpose to hurt you or look to others as they promised
themselves to and for you. Blessed
to know that there are still some out there that fight forward together. I have been able to witness those who may
not even talk, may tolerate each other’s emotional and verbal sometimes physical
abuse. Then there are others that do
others to hold on to each other and lift each other up. Love, relationships like those scratch off
lotto tickets. Sometimes there something
worthwhile that pays out over time and others its just another game that someone
will have to lose.
I
didn’t stop playing, my game choice may have changed a bit as I learned that
one of Gods true blessing was learning to love myself and knowing you do not
have to give yourself away to be who you were meant to be. And the fact remains
we are never alone so choice of who you want in your life matters.
What
you allow to take place with, for, around you is lasting even if you are not being
that hateful hurtful one in any relationship.
And if you have children; trust me when I say they are learning to be
what you allow in front of them. In
words, in actions; all of what you say or do not say.
So
where does that leave Gods future plans?
What about the children and is there really a future? Those raised up in luxury because of careers
that took over the parents who provided everything but time and themselves. Oh, don’t get me wrong. You can have it all or nothing at all. You can come from a deeply loving family or
have no one and still turn out good throw your life away.
Choices
matter: I have known some very well known and well to do families and someone
in the family as the black sheep because they choose the life of drugs, and the
streets or everything opposite than that of making productive positive
contributions in and for their own life much less society. Then I have known those that came from
nothing and truly fought their way through to make a difference because I am
one. Yes, I had a family; yes, my mother
and father were married when I was conceived, and I have a brother and sister;
and on the fathers side 8 Aunts and Uncles; on the mothers side something like
12. Cousins. Oh, there is abundance.
Some
cultures get it right; in America we have lost the family unit. We do everything out of selfish ambitions
and when we do not like something or are done.
We turn off and pretend family doesn’t exist. Filling it up with addictions to work, and
many other things!
Some
cultures turn to family to help build up and raise a family; others want no
part.
That
old statement it takes a village to raise a child. I guess that is what we do when we put our
trust in those who are supposed to be for us.
Sometimes
those we trust closest to us are the ones that will do the most damage.
So
how do we know to make the right choice in those we let in? I wish I knew!
The
only one for sure thing I do know is everything I have learned over the years
about Jesus Christ is that He is always been and will always be
unchanging.
He gave all He was for us before we ever came
into this world and is always there no matter how much I or anyone else makes
the wrong choices, hurts us on purpose or accident. Yes, the hurt can come from what they do, or
don’t do. Say or don’t say. Those that are always there but just never
show up.
Gosh
how we find ourselves through or in life; or if we ever do. Somedays I am still just as lost for
things, for people for desire that may or may never come to life.
Imperfectly
perfect. As I watch the layers of my
own choices through out life peeling back the layers only to somedays take on
more unnecessarily in the process of trying to save others the tears and pain;
and all you can do is watch their own self destruction and distraction and
there is nothing you can do but watch the hurts and hang-ups they create in their
own journey and blessings given.
All
the while you may not be out there running in the dark or purposely hanging
with those you will never really know.
Yet somehow you find yourself self-structing because you know despite
your best effort you just hope for those things that just are not meant in your
time.
Is
it because you care too much? Is it
because you want the best of all of it?
Whatever that it is; love, laughter, life for yourself and those you
care deeply about. Caught up in that
which must be done in the world for the choices you make. Doing your best to avoid the demons and joy
stealers. As you learned long ago you
can know someone all your life; to find
out you never really knew them at all.
Constant
is the battle of right and wrong; we all get to choose who we wish to truly
connect or those we allow to toy with us or us with them.
At
what point do you really surround yourself with no agenda friends to help plant
and sow the field of all that is good, all that is beautiful all that is nourishing
mind, body, and spirit? When we do, what
is it that distracts us who is it that we give as adults the authority to direct
our steps to right and wrong?
We
are (humanity) one giant sticky bun. Life
sweet, yet so messy. Allowing all that
tastes so good at times yet knowing at some point just how bad it really is or
can be for any hopes in the future.
It
is more than just being a good human.
It is more than acts of kindness, it is more than paying it forward as
we deserved none of the forgiveness, mercy, and grace we were given and still
each day allowed up still given.
Where
is the love for us, where is the self-preservation taking us and have forgiven
ourselves and let go of what we were that got us where we are today.
Holding
on tight to those moments of life that we really feel alive. Using our moral compass and keeping it real doing
our best to shine bright to help others grow.
Leaving it all at the foot at the cross and allowing the one who created
us to lead us back to what was, what is and what forever will be. Even if we do not know what that truly
means.
Thank
you, Lord, for allowing me to know you and spend time in your presence and want
every day more of what is good, what is pure, what is real. May I never lose my compass that keeps me
walking with and towards all that is good in you Jesus. Fill me up; fill up all I am connected even
when I do not understand. Even when;
even if! All those scars that come with
living! Lord heal your people; heal this
land. Lead Us; wake us up Father God;
make us get up and just keep moving; keep walking doing our best while finding
you within our souls.
Psalms 6:6-9 (NIV) 6 I am worn out from my
groaning.
All night long I
flood my bed with weeping
and drench my couch with tears.
7 My eyes grow weak with sorrow;
they fail because of all my foes.
8 Away from
me, all you who do evil,
for the Lord has heard my weeping.
9 The Lord has
heard my cry for mercy;
the Lord accepts my prayer.
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