Wednesday, July 14, 2021

07.14.2021_July(PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)

 

Music pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ and are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise and are free for public consumption****   (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)


Date: Wednesday July 14th , 2021  

Meditation Opportunities - Biblegateway.com Daily Verse

John 15:10 (EXB - EXPANDED BIBLE)

10 I have ·obeyed [kept] my Father’s commands, and I ·remain [abide] in his love. In the same way, if you ·obey [keep] my commands, you will ·remain [abide] in my love.

Motivation Movers & Touches to the Soul (YouTube.Com)

When You Speak — VOUS Worship

Look To Jesus - Phil Wickham

TobyMac - Help Is On The Way (Maybe Midnight)

TobyMac, Jordan Feliz - See The Light (RUSLAN Remix/Audio)

Come Alive (Dry Bones) (Lyric Video) - Lauren Daigle

Another In The Fire (Church Online) - Hillsong UNITED

THE STAND - Hillsong UNITED - LIVE IN MIAMI


  Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (Thinking out loud)

Do not remember the past events, pay no attention to things of old.  Look, I am about to do something new; even now it is coming.  Do you not see it?  Indeed, I will make a way in the wilderness, rivers in the desert.  (Isaiah 43:18-19) @Jen Schmidt Just Open The Door

 

No matter how often we open the door, and our good intentions or courteous loving ways are used or missed.   There is always something good to learn, to be, to do in everything that transpires.

Even when we don’t feel it!  No matter what it is and sometimes we just cannot put a name for it.     There is always purpose in all the joy, temporal anything or nothing at all and even in the pain.

Never stop looking up seeking all that is hopeful and brighter.   Never stop listening to the words and work of God and all creation to speak to you.

Never stop praying to be drawn near to all that grows beautiful without cost or impact at the expense of other human life.

That alone needs prayer 24/7…

I know in my silence or noise that static that creates chaos or contributes to anything positive.  Well, I am constantly needing to just feel the presence of all Christ is in and with me.

Love and peace so deep like laying back on a hot summer day in the cool spring brook looking up at the beauty of skies that wrap the earth with all the hope floating in the clouds of what was, what is and what will be.

So grateful I keep trying to fight forward.   So grateful that God has over time sent so many angels from his army to help get me back up, back on track to do anything or nothing at all.

 

I won’t ever understand allot.   But if I was not to be part of it.  If I were not to create or help, make it happen.   If all it was for more color to come into my world.  So be it.   Sure, the hair is up on my neck with caution and the wall built so tall I cannot even get over it any longer.

 

But nothing in life just happens.  Ever…

Own the blessings in every single scenario and when you do not see them ask God to reveal in you what was meant to be.   At the very least seek peace and the path to move onward and let go of what was yesterday that is gone and if it has not come to life then.    Do not waste any future on holding and waiting.    Be your best self and live life.

 

No that does not mean go out and party it up, giving yourself away in every possible way thought of.   Or be consumed by anything that controls the life you were given to live.

You can live life and miss, love and be all you want to be without giving pieces of yourself away to all that will rob or haunt you for the remainder of days you are given.

Yes, abstinence when it comes to sexual promiscuity.   And yes, have a drink with friends here and there or go have a great time visiting, entertaining, even dancing or anything you find fun.    But you don’t have to be out there taking or giving anything, you are away to live.

Loyalty, respect for self and the temple you were given to travel within comes first and by all means always respect your brothers and sisters even if they are not blood.  They are human and created with the same beautiful intentions by the very same God of this universe as we were.

The very same Jesus that hung on that cross, died, and came back three days later and will rise again for all who was alive when it took place as we are today; loved no less and meant for so much more then just being like anyone or everyone else.    More than riding on the coattails of anyone or what they do.  

When you do what you do, and you feel it through the atmosphere, and it never let’s go.   Maybe waking you in the sound of a deep sleep or in the middle of any day.    No matter who stands by to their word or they make up their own definition of loyalty and truth. 

Jesus is, was and always will be here and now or on the other side of eternity.   

We here and now can claim, promise our lives and anything we are blessed with away for everything that lasts our lifecycle or just moments in time that leave pain throughout every beat of our hearts while here.  

Facts will always be facts… and there will always be someone, something that hurts and hopefully prayerfully even more that just fills you with much more than what takes away from the moments you are given.

 

Anyone that reads any pieces of me, realizes I am all over the place, but one fact is somewhere along the line I was blessed to hear the calling of Christ Jesus.  And even if I cannot touch the physical being.   His spirit lives within me.    That God no matter anything; not just what.   If you let go of what you think makes sense and grasp on to faith deep in hope of all that is written for more than you or I will ever be around to justify if time is what is needed for the world to believe.

 

When you get there, you know.   Be it all of the times you realize should have been it.  Maybe all those you loved so much that when bad things happened you are crushed broken and as you see you in the mirror you no longer recognize what it all means or who the new you as you pick up the pieces and keep trying to live even though you want to die.

What about love when you give yourself away just to be loved and hear all those empty promises and after a day, a year, or even seconds that other soul reflects their truth.    That unfortunately selfish ambitions to collect and use up whatever they can get for free takes over and all you have is that what you turn into ever lasting lessons.

No matter what your burdens, choices, mistakes, or the scars of the collateral damage that caught you by surprise of just living life or being in the wrong place at the wrong time. 

 

Lift your eyes up.   Never stop looking up.   At one point and time or another it is hard for everyone.   Some have it much harder than others.  Some just don’t want to deal with at all so they float and ride the waves of whatever they can consume before it consumes them.   And it will!  It always does…

It does not matter who we are; we all have to fight forward for those who need help and support as well our own beings.    Not in anger, not in strive, not in bitterness because life does not go according to the plans set forth.

Damn if I was mad over every single moment something didn’t turn out.      I would have dried up and disappeared a long time ago.    I have to purpose daily, and it does not always win that happy joy, joy smiling moment.       Some days I am so exhausted and discouraged feeling like I could be so much more if I just became more selfish and forget everyone else and just ran off living for myself.

Remembering all the times I did do that and was so stinking blessed undeservingly in my youth.   And no, I am not old, but I have lived enough to know that it is God who breathes life into these dry bones that will return to the dust they once were breathed to life.

 

Come alive and really live!   What does that look like for you?   Are you in a dead-end relationship where you cannot stand each other but you tolerate each other because of maybe the kids, maybe you have too much financial equity that you know neither of you are willing to take what you truly worked for but want everything the other has?   How about being stuck in that domestic emotional and/or physical relationship that is going to destroy you in the end.   But you feel you have no where to go so you just hope for the best that it will get better.

 

Living on the streets, you lost everything not by anyone’s fault but just how life works sometimes, or maybe you have lost everything you think was all that gave you life and you don’t know how to get back on track.   

If you got back up today and you have air in your lungs.   No matter how much it hurts to breathe.    God has purpose and plans for you.   Call out to him and ask him to show you the way.  Today, right here, right now and any tomorrow’s you may receive.

 

It won’t be any easier, but you will find a strength deep within that no one will ever be able to take from you…  His grace that surrounds and consume and protects all that you were meant to be.

Take the stand for something positive not to prove anything to anyone but to lead the way.  No matter what it costs you in the world.    Dare to be different… Dare to be your own person.  Dare to love without an agenda, Dare to accept love without ever really knowing what it means.

Dare to be you as I will always continue to Dare as I also will always be me.  Always as I was, always as I can be, always as I might be.  Just always just me Kelly.

 

I never picked it, planned it, never any goals with someone supporting, pushing, and helping along the way.   Yes, sure wanted to be a vet, wanted to go into the peace corps, wanted to fall in love and have a family and live and love with that one forever.    Wanted to be something different, something that gives light and not constantly needing to keep up and be like anyone else.  

 

No matter what I picked, became, or even am classified in this great world of judgement.   I will stand surrendered to the one who called me his own.  For Christ bled out on that cross in great hope of humanity, love, and kindness and all he believed could be.   In awe, never enough that I could ever come close.  Despite what I want, what I dream, who I am or who I loved or love.    Christ Jesus is the reason we are allowed to choose and why we are allowed to just breathe even on the days we seem to be drowning.

Kindness matters in the logical world of things.    We all do what we do, and it matters.   But do not let it consume you so much that you are no longer you but that of what the world says you have to be.     And if you do… just be good, kind and be a light even when you cannot find one.  Dig in and fight forward until you do.

 

Meditation Opportunities Daily Devotion @Jesus Calling 365 Devotions with Real-Life Stories @Sarah Young)      “Whenever you feel distant from Me, whisper my name in loving trust.”

Proverbs 18:10 The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run to it and are save.

Acts 4:12 Salvation is found in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven given to men by which we must be saved.

John 16:34  “Until now you have not asked for anything in my name.  Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.” 

Tuesday, July 13, 2021

07.13.2021_July(PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)

 

Music pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ and are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise and are free for public consumption****   (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)

Date: Tuesday July 13th , 2021  

Meditation Opportunities - Biblegateway.com Daily Verse

Philippians 2:9-11 (EXB - EXPANDED BIBLE)

So God ·raised [exalted] him to the highest place.
    God ·made his name [or gave him the name] ·greater than [far above] every other name
10 so that every knee will bow to the name of Jesus—  everyone in heaven, on earth, and under the earth.   11 And ·everyone 
[L every tongue] will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord
    and bring glory to God the Father.

 

Motivation Movers & Touches to the Soul (YouTube.Com)

Help Is On The Way by Unspoken

Delta Goodrem - Flawed

Tauren Wells, Gary LeVox - Until Grace (Lyrics) | Until grace called my name

Michael Ketterer, Influence Music - Spirit Lead Me

 Just Pray When You Need Jesus


 

 Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (Thinking out loud)

I wish it were just that easy.   Easier said then done is beyond words when we are facing the giants of life.   Be it layers of so many things that like to just keep going on and on.  Layers of sadness of those you lost, those you are losing, those you figured out you never really had and the twinge of betrayal that cuts you over and over.

Get back up echoing in your head as you try to bury yourself deeper out of sight out of mind; not wanting because you have nothing left that can do or give what that which is now gone once made you feel.

The ripples of the ocean tide will never stop for any length of time.  

Which is why it is beyond anything else in this world then to find where your hope, courage, strength, and ability to get back up comes from.

It cannot come from your buddy, your family, your sister, brother, cousin or even bestie.    It cannot come from what you pour into your body, your veins to numb or accelerate what you are feeling.

Not if you want it to last.

I was an angry, bitter soul who took everything anyone had ever done to me, through me out on my own me.    For a very long time in my youth.    I did not care if I lived or died.   In fact, the crowd I ran with would tell you you’re not living unless your living dangerous.   

The sad thing about it is, most of my living all happened before I even became legal age according to the standards of the world.

 

Times are different from then to now.   Because me and the crew that ran together ventured out, and now everything comes right where you are.

Parents watch your children!

Know who they are!

Know what they are doing and who they are doing it with!

Know who is on the other side of the gaming control.   For that matter if you let your children out on social media at all.     Do everything you can to control the security and privacy.

 

For those that think their kids are okay hanging out.     Someone is always watching and just waiting for their opportunity.  And not for nothing;   when my kid hangs out wherever and runs into your kid hanging out getting into things wherever.  

  When something happens; well, we cannot control anyone.   But we damn sure can be educating our children on choices and the results and impacts that happen by the choices made.

It is hard, I worked two jobs while going to school and raised two kids.    I refused to become a statistic in the world’s factors.   But somehow, I did anyway.   Because even though I was doing for the better.   My kids were still living in a broken home and being bought and not taught or sheltered by anyone that would step up and teach when I could not.

My kids turned out to be beautiful souls and human beings.   With both raised up knowing mamma hates drama and you better know the choices you make matter, and they belong to you when the result does not turn out the way you anticipated.    

Well one thrives and one I swear fights self-infliction and gives up more than tries.    One dares to challenge and learn, while the other believes everything everyone says and then when it turns out totally unexpected.    They quit and the self-infliction makes a mamma want to do more than cry.

 

Not just in our homes but all around us.    Do you know who and why you serve and do whatever it is you do?     From your actions or lack of at home to maybe you just walk past that homeless person or ignore the cries for help of the beaten and battered family up the street.

Maybe you think you have come to far and you are too beyond reaching down to help anyone up with kindness.    Maybe you do and maybe it is just those in your chosen circle.  And you feel justified.

 

Like the slow drip of honey from the honeycomb; the worlds poison is slowly drowning the promises of new life without purposed change.

 

I wish it were that easy to just smile and wave and believe everything those who keep tapping in trying to tangle up your heart strings even when they do not know they are doing it.    Or what about the repeat offender.   Those you have helped over and over, and they keep saying next time or soon it will be different.    Yet the only difference is you finally had to shut the doors and windows and put blockades up so that you can make the change for them.

 

Who said life was easy?

No where in the bible did it ever say that, for sure.   In fact, even in John 16:33 it says there will be trouble.  “I told you these things so that you can have peace in me. In this world you will have ·trouble [persecution; suffering], but ·be brave [take courage/heart]! I have ·defeated [victory over; conquered; overcome] the world.” 

 

 I have had my fair share.  I have given my fair share.   Which is why I continue to fight forward and want something better and ever lasting and real.      

You know the need for the maybe homeless dude sitting on a curb by a drive through in  90-degree heat just to get a can filled while he plays his guitar.    May or may not really be in need for a home.   But the need is there even if it is his way of collecting money for his next fix.

Who are we to judge?  Yes, I have taken homeless people into a restraint with me and sat them down and made the eat a meal with me.  And yes, I have sat there praying I don’t catch anything as they were so dirty afraid of critters.  I have also given unknowns money at traffic lights, online, and even argued when taking food to people at intersections that really did not want food, they said they needed on their signs but wanted the money instead.

 

But no matter if its change out of your pocket or your savings out of an account.    What and why we serve or do what we do with what we have been given.       Just as much what matters is having no agenda or expectation when things turn out differently or harshly because when you thought you were helping you were only enabling bad behaviors that that soul in question already had full throttle running in the wrong direction.

From experience the best thing and only thing you can really do for them.  Is pray!

 

We all believe in something.   Even a person who says they are an atheist believes enough in a God to not want to get to know his son Jesus or make the choice to believe in what they want and not what is written for the will of God.

 

Me I have never not believed in a higher power, a God that owned and controlled all things.    I just never had the opportunity until 95 to start my journey in meeting Christ until then.

With that I learn more each day and nothing is ever the same.      Sure, the issues still rise up and man when my own were full blown how it made me crazy, sick, and bitter.

 

Somethings are still true.   I will always have a little something of crazy that comes to life.   But the peace that filled up all the voids of a lifetime of hurts, habits, and hang-ups.   Or even the new one’s that come along like when I found out at age 50 my father was not really my only father and all the pieces fell into place  as to why I ended up being a throw away kid myself.

 

Yeah, be careful what you choose to do and what you get into.  It will haunt you even for a little while.     My choice during big ancestry and my heritage phase and wanting to know what I was really made of and turning my family onto it.  Well although I cannot change me, truth is not always what is in front of us.   Sometimes what is not being said or not showing up  is really never what we have always believed.         Everything I was mad at all my life, hurt over all my life and suffered at the hands of others in my childhood could have been avoided.   If only people owned their choices.       I spent a lifetime of setting myself up knowing the answers in the end and hating those who were never there for me when parents should have been.

 

It is what it is until it is not.    

 

Have I learned knowing what I know now from all that once was?    I wish I could say yes for me.   My eyes are still bigger than my stomach always ordering more food than I can eat in one serving or the fact my heart is still way to easily fooled to believe there is good reason or good in every soul that I have been connected and when they tell me to trust them even though I don’t.   I stand too close too long to allow some of the collateral damage to chip away at what should not be.

 

Flawed…WE are all filled with beautiful flaws.   So, what will we do with them?  So much the same even though so different.  Yet all created for one purpose to love and be loved.  

Until you find the means and truth to love yourself for whom God created you to be and be freed by Christ Jesus.    None of what we do really does anything but giving and taking away without any rhyme or reason.

 

Crazy yeah!  Maybe not so much.   But the fact remains this is pieces of me over time and I recall those days I felt so judged and no matter what I did, what I made, what I earned.  None of it mattered when it came down to my own self destruction worrying about living up to a world full of expectations that change every chance someone thinks long enough.

Until I heard grace calling my name like all that I see spinning around in every direction.   Now I just pray more of who I am blessed to connect with, to or for.    Nothing is ever wasted when I let the spirit lead me.

 

So, no matter what title, or anything for that matter that anyone takes from you to make their own.   You alone are unique and beautifully made and have so much more to grow forward and contribute.  Despite flaws or the imperfections of time that we will never have enough of.

 

When all hope is gone, or even if you think you alone control what is.    Control is an illusion and hope comes from the one who has allowed you up each day.   Christ Jesus who was given eternal life and blessings on the day of calvary and the cross that poured out all he would have been so we could be!

 

Just get back up.  Prove them wrong.    Be who God created you to be for HIM not the world.

As I remind myself as well.   Even though I too want to just be, all I dream or just bury myself deep under that which I no longer need to believe in anything to get by.  Or better yet prove anything to maintain.  

I know it is what it is until its not and when its not I have been chosen to be more than just a number, just a girl, just a statistic, just a mother, aunt, sister, cousin, wife, divorcee, teacher, leader, IT professional, project manager, lover, hater and on and on.    I am as every soul created are created and chosen to be life and abundance for the creator who gave more than just looks, sounds, talents or gifts.

Created for eternal love and ever after life.    Prayerfully able to meet all we are in love with and for in our next lives on the other side.   Yet, until then just keep being our best self’s and really holding true to all that is good, beautiful, and surrendering to all that can be.   Just praying for all that you are Jesus!

Monday, July 12, 2021

07.12.2021_July(PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)

Music pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ and are free for public consumption**** Bible Verses pulled from https://www.biblegateway.com/ unless noted otherwise and are free for public consumption****   (NIV -New International Version, NKJV-New King James Version, AMP -Amplified Version, TPT-The Passion Translation)

 

Date: Monday July 12th , 2021  

Meditation Opportunities - Biblegateway.com Daily Verse

Matthew 4:4 (EXB - EXPANDED BIBLE)

Jesus answered, “It is written in the Scriptures, ‘A person lives not on bread alone, but by ·everything God says [Levery word that comes out of God’s mouth; Deut. 8:3].’”

Motivation Movers & Touches to the Soul (YouTube.Com)

John Allan - Born To Praise

 

 

 Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (Thinking out loud)

Just because I forgive you.

Just because I love you with all that I am.

Does not mean the lack of boundaries or repeating a process where things continue down the same path until one or all fall apart totally from the insanity that ripples through even the best.

Change will come.

Everyone will be impacted.

You, Me, (We) get to choose how to start the process, end the process or the reaction we take on when we are spinning in the process.

 

So, before you are angry, raging and running at the world or anyone that looks up.   Have you really challenged your own being first?   Do you really know what it is you want before you leave scars and people bleeding out in your path behind you?

I trip over my own little feet all the time.   Taking off running and realizing the messes and missing parts along the way.

Be it work-life-balance or just casualties of day to day.

I thank the good Lord above every second I am allowed to get back up be it full of energy and running or barely moving and just wanting to crawl deeper under the blanket and dream.

No matter what it was, what it can be, what it will be.  It is what it is; until it is not.

 

Panic stricken today, easily swayed when you work in IT and the roller coaster ride of lay  off’s is more frequent no matter how good you are or if your hands and feet were out just a little on the ride.     In today’s day and age when you need to have employment, and you are trying to be your best self and remain accountable.   Not to mention you have others that depend on you.

Well, when your internet goes down just before you are to host a meeting and you are down for too long.  It just is what it is.

 

Not thrilled, I could not have done anything any different than that of going and trading out equipment.    Yet my own worse critic shreds me, wondering how that could be different.

Grace and Mercy, Law, legalistic shards spinning as you are on that hamster wheel just trying to do day to day.

 

I am at the stage I am ready to retire and just go pick up here and there work to keep pocket change for that cup of coffee with friends.    Unfortunately, though I still have much time ahead.  Especially being I have given away my entire savings all my life.

 

So, knowing these things.  How do we get past the panic-stricken tiring moments in life that you just can’t stand having to prove your worth to anyone in anything you do?  Yet because the world is what it is,   We must still do so.   Be it because we thrive serving or enjoy what we do for day to day.  And anyone in their right mind wants more than just to survive.

 

 Well as these severe storms are back again today and all the time and frustration of the morning wasted.    Even when it hurts, even when lights flash and something blow through new beginnings or blow the weight of the world on all that is.    I am thankful to have gotten up on more day.

 

Hating to prove my worth to anyone.  And sick of the fact that no matter how many come to me and are thankful…Yet we still have to reach back and document for recognition of a job well done.    Be it not for selves but especially in big companies for expectations and possible micro-management.

 

Or how about when you spend years in a field, and you are damn good.  You still have to prove to yourself its going to be okay.   You got this.   Because the God calls you His own and calls you up and out to do so.

 

So as I regroup from the little disruptions of life be it what I am trying to accomplish to deliver; or those I trip over and face plant deep in the thick and it takes my breath away.  

I look up and fight for you to grasp on Jesus.   There is no in-between.

I just need you and all you allow to be.   In the end nothing really matters here anyway.    It is either going to add to  or take away from the life you have blessed us with.   Prayers I always find a lesson, a message, or a blessing to plant forward.


Sunday 5-11-2025_PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe (AlwaysMeKelly)

  ***Music, and/or daily scripture, verses, motivational shares pulled from public domains and made available for public consumption from pu...