Saturday, November 2, 2019

09.Wk4_2019_ September (PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)




 **** Scripture from https://www.biblegateway.com/  unless noted otherwise**** Music links and reference pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ are free for public consumption****



 (Disclosure – I am grammatically incorrect most any day these words flow as a release of this mind maze which gives me my sanity not to impress the critics or English majors (said with much love and respect)



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 Every day you are up - Every day you inhale.  Every day you have something to complain or be ecstatic about.  Every day is a day to be thankful for something; we are all a work in progress.    Every day is an opportunity to write your story! What will yours be?              

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September 30, 2019
Verse of the Day:

Philippians 1:9-10 (NIV) And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ,



Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Matthew 6:34 (NIV) 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.



John 10:10 (NIV) 10 The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.



James 4:13-15 (NIV) Boasting About Tomorrow




13 Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” 14 Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. 15 Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”







Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Thank you, Jesus, for this new day.   As I am up and down all night with things churning wondering what it will take to heal some and thinking of those, I could never help and all the twists and turns the mind sometimes is filled by whispers in the dark.



Thinking of those who were so beautiful and talented yet lost forever; thinking of those near and even those far.



Praying for the souls of my own bloodline and that they find peace within the pureness of you which they hold.     The faith within they cannot see; and watching them is like watching them drown because the refuse to swim.



For all the others, gone but never forgotten as we just learn to let go never understanding why those who have everything still entangle themselves and take the very thing that matters most from those who have little.    Trust, respect hope in what is good.      The collateral damages left behind in this world be it our polluted oceans from lack of humanity caring; to ravaged lands for natures anger to just those trying to shake off the latest violation of those they put their faith and beliefs in the most. 



  Addictions or loneliness that misleads the souls over time.    That tsunami wave of results wiping out all in its path as they run ahead thinking they are burying that affair they had as they are paying off the demons that are in their head.   Not caring of all they destroy along the way.   Broken truths layer the souls riddled with choices.   Where most times they cannot get out of their own way and only see the negativity filled with I Can’t while others sour past at the expense of the bloodied steps they climbed.   



Looking out from within, you see victory every now and again.   Jesus is prevailed in that one being knowing the strength and courage of climbing up and out is not about me or you; but the promise of fulfillment and that someday-eternal glory land.



The world and its temporal strife for the games people play realizing not the consequences in the end will truly be their downfall for all the misdeeds and pains they cause along the way.    Yet until they feel the burn of yesterday’s gone by, all they have is what eats them alive as they stalk the darkness seeking a sign to know if the world has found out yet.   As they know, playing games with other is nothing they will ever be able to forget.  At least when they never started out with this purpose, but life sped off getting out of hand like a rocket or jet.  They never had intended is the one sure bet!



Heartbreaking to want just a connection something pure be with everything or nothing.   Knowing from the start you were never what would be.



 Yet you play along until you run out of pieces to contribute and like a spoiled child they throw you and all that was broken, tossed out to the wind as if you never existed, their intentions for no one ever to find out or see.  Their little posse full of misguided loyalties shall burn down with the flames of hell in the end truly.



For you the scars do come with living, as do the consequences of our choices.   Like the seasons change you have no control of what next.  You just ready for the storms knowing who has you in all things.



Unfortunately the broken pieces although beautifully blessed that they are back together; the wall and distortion for what humanity could have been is blocked and never to be seen the same way again. 







The authority of survival, which must stand true to all you never planned but deep inside, just knew.     As the seasons, change soon the winter snow will come and the frozen bonds of yesterday will all be but gone as you seek the warmth all you can do is cling to the God of hope mercy and grace.   For yesterday’s will never be forgotten but never again be within your time or space.



Reminded to not worry about tomorrow forget the distractions future concerns or even the pain of those lost lessons of trust that you were burned.    Remaining with all your energy focused on God as He alone will carry you through and train you up.



It will be the many; it will be the few; it will not matter if any do.   You know what is real, what was they and who is you.  Most importantly, you know “His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness” 2 Peter 1:3(NIV)







For today, you were given, so remember who is in charge and keep doing your best, keep on living.      Prayers of redemption, love honor and reconciled forgiveness.     No harm no foul in life they call it just business.   All the while, you desire, wish, want just for purity to last for more than that split second or ten minutes. 







Oh, this mind maze toils and foiled on daily grains; knowing who is in charge and you eventually will get past the sadness and pains.    As it has never been about you no matter how broken you have become; no matter how stained.    It is our Lord and Savior who ultimately has and will always carry your burdens and all the pain.    So never stop looking up; there is beauty in everything.    A word, a song even that misdeed.      Give it all to the maker for He holds all powers to be.   Stay close watch and see.



For reality came in the death and disbelief within humanity so for this the hardest part to let go for the final round.  When you realized even those who play for the crowd are the greatest pretenders around fooling even themselves to what matters.    Not when, not why.  But just how.


Do what you must to save your soul; for in life you will forever bare that cross until it is rectified with Father God, Jesus and the Holy Ghost.





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Well September tis the end of the day and like many it has been a roller coaster ride making me realize and continually remember just how much I need Jesus in my life minute by minute.



It’s not just the hurts, habits or hang-ups that cause me to bleed out; or that of what I allow others to do to my spirit by trying to just be me and remain a good person.   For I am far from perfect.  I can go from zero to yup that mean person in 60 seconds or less.   I am constantly wandering in this mind maze and yes even some days imagining how to line em up.   All that have done me wrong.



I know life is what it is; as I know God will shake it all out.    "I Choose to live by choice, not by chance; to make changes, not excuses; to be motivated, not manipulated; to be useful, not used; to excel not compete.  I choose self-esteem, not self-pity.  I choose to listen to my inner voice, no the random opinion of others." Author Unknown"



With that although my caring what happens to others with a living soul.  Sure it gets me in over my head way too often.   Sure, it breaks my heart daily and in some cases the scars will never heal.    But I also know that the God above has made me for far more that what this world will ever give or take.



Sure, I have never looked at the world with rose color glasses; nor will I ever be able to look at some that I loved and admired for what seems to be a lifetime without pity.       Will I take what they say or do towards me personally.    To maintain safety absolutely.   But life is more than anything about me and certainly far more than anything or others.



Life is Love, Honor, Respect for self and all others.    So as third quarter comes to a close; its just business.  File it all away; own and grow forward what can be; file what needs to be and keep pushing forward as God awaits the light to shine on.



Is it hard; oh, hell yes!  Weary, broken, battered in this life does not even come close to describing what this world can do.   Then watching others, you desperately love and care for and just want them to believe and succeed and they cannot get out of their own way.



Kind of leaves me really pissed off for when those who do have it together decide to chip pieces away with their deception.  More so it's not just you they are doing this everywhere they go.  So you cut the ties, report the lies, and give it all to the man upstairs and keep looking up high.



No, I have not lost my mind; my words my rhymes they are my lifeline.   Most any day most any time.



For the Lord above knows why.



So, thank you for all these lessons in life and who not to believe in or why.    Tomorrow starts brand new.    It's a tough road ahead for many, for me for the one reading, yup you!       But don't give up, don't give in.



Only God knows and if he gets you up tomorrow; all brand-new adventures await to start all over and do better with Him.



No words or deeds can come between; the God who saves and those who truly believe.



Unfortunately, no matter what; things in life come a dime a dozen and no matter how broken or annoyed I may get.   I wish I could hate; but that is not what God has allowed my heart to participate.



Laughter, tears, lies or cheers are worth nothing if we do not feed them with time.

So here we go God; I have stumbled, falling hard, but I am up you know this.   Brushed off and forever indebted to you Jesus.  As I brush off taking a drink from your cup; it is you that will forever fill me up.



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September 29, 2019






09/29/2019 New Life Christian Church – Spring Hill  9/29/2019 9:45am service this weeks sermon is on the New Worldwide church. We do not own the rights to worship we are covering but I hope you enjoy it. Have a blessed Sunday and week ahead.    https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2467971396628675/?t=11




Verse of the Day:

John 3:20-21 (NKJV)



For everyone practicing evil hates the light and does not come to the light, lest his deeds should be exposed. But he who does the truth comes to the light, that his deeds may be clearly seen, that they have been done in God.”





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Psalms 34:4-7 (NIV) I sought the Lord, and he answered me;  he delivered me from all my fears.    Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame.   This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles.   The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them.





2 Peter 1:16-17 (NIV) 16 For we did not follow cleverly devised stories when we told you about the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ in power, but we were eyewitnesses of his majesty. 17 He received honor and glory from God the Father when the voice came to him from the Majestic Glory, saying, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.”[a]



John 17:3 (NIV) Now this is eternal life: that they know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent.







Psalms 139:14 (NIV) 14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful; I know that full well.











Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Thank you, Father God, for this day and all that has come to pass; I am blessed more than I could have ever imagined or dreamed so many years ago.



 With life, with love, with laughter; it has not been easy by far.



 In fact, I have learned so many lessons over this journey but one that has stuck for my life time; I will and I have never done life on my own. 



I am nothing without you and see few and far between to know the truth when I do not walk with you.   Yes, I have worked hard and achieved much even before I openly started walking with you Jesus.   We all know it was because of your design that I was able to do so.





Just as those who have designed to care more than most with big hearts and layered up scars because we watch so much being taken advantage of; so many not believing in themselves; too many giving up and giving in to the negative dark things of the world.





Even those we know from the beginning are too good to be true but try to hold just a little piece of something real to make a difference.  When in the end, well life just makes room for more to be allowed in while we forget the pains and the loss of what we could not make the difference for you Lord.





Yes, we all want something in return; love, kindness and that eternal connection to see things grow and spread like beautiful wildflowers in a vast meadow.



Realizing life is more like the desert with many cacti that continually stick us when we get too close.





So close that we cannot wrap our arms around it yet close enough so that once we know we are stuck we try back peddling yet are stuck as we bleed out while trying to heal from the poisons that seep into our veins. 





Yet our Lord and Savior remind us of the beauty in all things of this world, just as the reminder that even some cactus produces beautiful flowers in the end.



So, what we must do is prayerfully give it back to you Lord and allow you to prune and eliminate or allow new buds to blossom and grow.







Walking with Jesus or without is a personal choice; knowing boundaries in people for your own expectations as well as theirs is a must.   Do not allow yourself to stay in the desert so long you care not to leave your safe place.  All the same do not allow yourself to believe half of what anyone tells you.







It is proven with historical movies, and writings there are even those that where the cloth to reflect God violate the very innocence of humanity as well as all that God stands for.





So why would a perfect stranger not satisfy and say what they want you to hear while they obtain what they selfishly seek after.     For the same reasons even those we may have known since childhood would do the same to those who are family and /or love.



We all fall short by the glory of God and all His intended purpose and direction of a promise land.



Perhaps that is why those who really walk with Christ practicing obedience and doing their best will see all that is golden on the other side of forever in eternity.







It is our Sovereign Lord that is and always will be the same today, tomorrow and ever after.   We here on earth go through so many mood swings and treat people based on how we feel 24/7.    Sadly, how we feel depends on what we are seeking and receiving and / or when we are unable to; or worse yet when we are on the other end of someone forcing their expectations on us and discarding what is left of those used like trash.





But in life it happens; so, despite if you have been treated well or not.  Do not sweat the small stuff; because there is always something bigger coming around the corner.



If you have set yourself up to what looks like a failure or failing point; know Gods got this.



Things may be harder than you think you deserve to downright not sure what you will do to survive.    Believe in his forgiving abundant mercy and grace and pray for justices to be served on those who wronged you.     Better yet we should be praying for everyone no matter what. 



Giving thanks in all the storms no matter how easy or hard. 



How we should all try remembering if you cannot be good stewards of little; if you cannot appreciate even the air you breathe.   Why would anyone deserve something more?





Sure, I have had my fill where I have done great things and wiped any blessings out with the push of a button; or the belief in a soul I was connected.



That does not mean the good Lord cares any more or any less of me.  In fact, He draws me closer as he knows I need Him more than I need anything of this world and even thou I walk in the valley on any given day.   I am only here by His grace and prayerfully he will allow me to keep walking it through until my babies are grown.  But if not, I know paradise awaits.



My family hates when I talk about the fact I have seen much in this world; not the best of everything I am sure.  But the good and bad in much; people are people; and we all fall short.



For me each day you Jesus allow me up; I will continue to try and grow forward.   For the days I am unable I pray you have mercy on my soul.



Please be with me to lead those who are always watching; please guard my heart, lead my steps and hold my tongue.   For I know what easily could change someone forever.   I am a product of those who cared not.





Despite it all; blessed never surrendering never giving up.   Even now as I am weary some days more than others.



It is your will I must continue towards in hope and prayer someone will eventually be waiting on the other side when it is time to pick me up.



Thank you for all I have been; all I will be and all I am.  Just me Kelly   beautifully broken and fully aware of how blessed I truly am.   Knowing how many will never get a chance to know you and never deserved anything that transpired evil towards them.   Thank you for this awareness, thank you for this day and this life.







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September 28, 2019

Verse of the Day:





1 Corinthians 2:14 (NIV) The person without the Spirit does not accept the things that come from the Spirit of God but considers them foolishness, and cannot understand them because they are discerned only through the Spirit.





Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Truly humility does cure worldliness when you are a believer you so tire easily of all the noise or static that is meaningless.  So much so that if you do not stay focused you lump every poor soul you connect with in the same unforgiving bucket.



So reminded in my late night where again at almost dawn I found myself capturing things and then devotional mediation times this morning again.







As these past couple months give me great awareness, I had been so caught up not paying attention in the blessings that I had been given for me to continue to shine on; I allowed 2019 to take a turn south.     Now yes, I have no control over life events and let’s just say is how I have a tendency to bury me in helping others when life gets heavy.


 Feeling the heaviness and loss of family, friends, and pets to age, circumstance and just they gave up on themselves so long ago they never had a chance to find their way back.    Watching people, you love hurting and there is nothing you can do.  Seems to be something I have seen too often over the years causing me to just keep trying to make a difference somewhere.



Yes, when you walk or connect with the least of these you become venerable even if you think you have it together.    One of the reasons you are warned to stay in the light with clean hands and pure hearts.





No, I have not slipped and given anything to Satan except may be continual prayers in the battlefield for protection and guidance of what do I do next and protection for all I love and care for.



But I did make my life much hotter than it needs to be allowing myself to stay in one place helping a little too long.  Believing in someone and something that really was not.


 Causing reality and humility  hitting so hard, like a sledge hammer that reminds us none are exempt when we think we can handle it even with prayers, signs we must have boundaries and someone to physically keep us accountable not to be sucked in by others schemes lies or ploys.



Foolish hearts no matter what you feel or see; each and every one of us should be responsible, accountable for our own steps to heal and get through reconciling the results of choices we make.



Be it the marriage that you forgot to stay connected and communicate and one of you or both stepped out to someone else; the drugs you take to sustain and get you through your grueling days so you can continue to have people look at you like an idol while you know God is the only thing anyone should see.   Or even the great hustles you get caught up in to line your own pockets because you are too selfish to get up and really appreciate what it means to work for what you have.    What about those who foolishly believe they are making a difference for those who really matter.   



Misguided, misaligned good intentions gone wrong plague this world and allow the army of darkness to invade you and your space and you never even realize they are there until you are connected, and the damage is under way.







Knowing what it is like to just want to matter, God reveals His is the truth, the light and the only way that matters.   Though we should not turn our backs to the world we need to walk that tight rope.  Balancing all that Jesus stands for with what should we really be saying, doing or being in this world.



When we slip; what happens next is within the hands of God.  No fancy trips will make it go away where we get to run off into the wilderness and try to be something we are not; pretending what is was not and what is not is.



No meltdowns you know those adult tantrums or bullying trying to force your need is greater than mine to have life will do.



Knowing how good the words were there are no expectations just pure factual truths; even if you really wanted to believe everything was really going to make a difference.   Yet that day really did come you could no longer willingly serve the purpose they were using you for and they for the first time spoke the truth how they used what was once their friends, their status and the brokenness of their minds while using you to feed their addictions and wave of bad choices.







That is what we do in this world right; use people, places and things up and keep trading them in for the next version to feed whatever it is that has you hungry.



Me feeding the need to help others to make my ego rest and feel worth something; knowing it is what it is until it is not.     However right wrong or indifferent, I will never go down without a fight or that white flag above my door. “White Flag” https://youtu.be/j-fWDrZSiZs @Dido





Yes, being the bride of Christ for longer than I even knew; I am forever in love and what is in this soul belongs to the keeper of all things not me.







Walking with God and the moral compass reflects a must to continue to do the best I can for what is right.   If that means making sure no harm comes to anyone else it is for God himself to align the justices and for me to hold tight, true and keep getting up every moment I am blessed.



Though it is hard when you have all or nothing mentality; where humility is the only humbling growth for what is good.      You never stop praying; for those immediately near your heart and all others.   No matter what you see, no matter who they think they really are, but you know they are no better or worse than anyone in this universe.   They just have not yet been exposed for the sins they walk with; while your transparency is bleeding out all over the path of righteousness in loss, bittersweet yesterday’s flogging no better tomorrows.





For the same God who holds the universe owns the outcome so it is not about doubts what will come next; it is when, or why. 





While all the beauty that rises with the sun fills your days with second by second new opportunity you pray your way through; thankful for the mercy and grace no one deserves however, you are allowed to #GrowForward  all the while you scurry to put all the collaterals back into place be it damaged or not.     You give them all back to God and pray your turn is finally here for pure Agape love. That love that silences all the noise of what was, all the noise of wants or thoughtful would of, should of and even could of.  If only!



Jesus reminds you always as he softly whispers “Lean On Me” https://youtu.be/7Cj5uYlwp6o @Kirk Franklin



The best we can do is live through Jesus as today will be our last day and love every single thing along the way; praying that He shakes out all that is dark, and unjust giving us strength along the way.    Knowing we are  all in Him and He in us  as we think we are finished for those who hold on realize we are just “Gracefully Broken” https://youtu.be/FP9FYyYso8o @Tasha Cobbs Leonard



It will never be who has the most; in fact, God uses the least of these more often than not with true meaning.  You cannot serve money and fame and serve the God who parts the seas giving us life every moment you are allowed up.   



  Be accountable in redemption, correction and love.    Know your boundaries for all that are good and never think you can fix anyone else or it is your job to fix any of their needs.  





First they will never stand on their own they will continue to use up everyone that comes along;  but they will also never be healed for what has gotten them there if they do not stand in and cleanse their own shadows to reflect the bright and bold beauty they truly are meant to be.   

"Maybe Its Okay" https://youtu.be/hl5GcRrJLyw  @we Are Messengers;  You know it is okay to not be okay in Him; as with everything in this world is temporary and this too shall pass.


   For there is nothing people, places or things can give you that define your worth and what you are truly meant to be.  I know “Who You Say I Am” https://youtu.be/IcC1Bp13n_4 @HillSong







I know I am “No Angel” https://youtu.be/BEP_dPN3Haw @Gregg Allman

However, I also know I belong to something greater than I will ever see or be here in earth.



Reminded no matter what fails it is only Jesus who can do all things and will.



  “Only Jesus Can” https://youtu.be/iBVzcN894tY @Vertical Worship  





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Resist the devil in My Name, and he will slink away from you.  Draw near to Me, and My Presence will envelop you in Love”.  @Jesus Calling-Sarah Young



Ephesians 3:16-19 (NIV) 16 I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, 17 so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.





Hebrews 4:14-16 (NIV)  Jesus the Great High Priest



14 Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has ascended into heaven,[a] Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. 15 For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. 16 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.





John 8:44 (NIV) 44 You belong to your father, the devil, and you want to carry out your father’s desires. He was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies.



James 4:7-8 (NKJV) Humility Cures Worldliness




Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.



09/28/2019  New Life Christian Church – Spring Hill 

https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2466753786750436/?t=239



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September 27, 2019





Verse of the Day:



Matthew 6:33 (NIV) But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)





Father God, thank you for never giving up on me, more importantly thank you for allowing me to recognize my need for you.  







I cannot imagine who I would be or where I would be or even if I would; if not for your loving kindness and abundant grace.







Oh, this foolish heart and constant dreams of mine.



Always trying to plant something or do something better that I have no business even looking at. 



Always having my eyes close and seeing from within that which is so much better than it truly is in this world.   Coming out on the other side with more and more layers of blocks to be put up and dumping humanity into one bucket when it comes to truth.







Why is it that I can go years without being consumed and with one slip Pandora’s Box is wide open and I am once again trying to get out of the race that consumes this mind of mine.



I have always been so blinded to see the truth in people even when I can see right through them.



I would be nothing and am nothing without you Jesus.  For as many times as you have pulled me from harm or directed me back to what really matters in this life.  I am beyond grateful in which no words or deeds will ever be enough to repay all that you allow when each day I am given air in these lungs.



Please guide me in the way that means most to your will Father God.   Not my own; as I am one step short of just giving in and burying all that you want from me.    Lord for all that I am may I know what I do has meaning for you.   



Life is full of harsh realities in which sometimes we lose focus worrying about things that should not really matter.    Guide and direct my steps and my voice in your will.



I seek refuge for me and all that wish to be connected to you Jesus.   I seek protection from all who do not for all who fill this heart of mine.



Allow me to be consumed by your beauty Father God and nothing more of this world.   For a while now I have made other things a bit more important and as you know the depths of this soul.    Please guide and direct all that is to be.



Thank you for this day.  In your perfect in precious name please hear all that is unsaid.



Prayers for all struggling with addictions including those who are hiding it well with the help of others.   May they be healed Father before it is too late and use all they have experienced in humility to grow your kingdom.





So many feel as they are trapped in the furnace that was given as a blessing; the vey vessels they walk within is the same they try to hide and peel away.   Guide and protect all in your kingdom Father.  



 Give strength, courage and wisdom for all that is next; let your children who are trying not to be consumed.



Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Deuteronomy 33:27 (NIV)

27 The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.
He will drive out your enemies before you, saying, ‘Destroy them!’



Psalms 27:13-14 (NIV)

13 I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord
    in the land of the living. 14 Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord.





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September 26, 2019



Verse of the Day:



Hebrews 10:30-31 (NIV) For we know him who said, “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” and again, “The Lord will judge his people.” It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.





Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)





Thank you, Jesus, for this new day even if I could barely make myself wake up today.   Normally I am fighting for sleep; last night you took me places out of this world and barely found my way back to wake up.   Thank you for the opportunity of this new day and all that may transpire.



Oh how I wish I got up to write all that was flowing out of this mind when I did wake; of course now I have already been up six hours and been zipping along at lightning speed in and out of various tasks and conversations that transpire out of my long days.      For this mind is swirling today and so very tired of circling the wagon trying to regroup and figure things out.     However always being one to say what is swirling; first I must say knowing one thing for sure; we never really know what tomorrow will bring.



  Along with the fact, yes, we should help our brothers and sisters in Christ when they are falling short of moral values in themselves, or others doing things that lead to damaging the future of anyone or anything.   Especially if it is affecting anyone directly.





However, if someone misleads us causing harm directly that is the business between you, him or her and whatever the proper channel to correct any fallout from the damage needing correction.   Of course, do your best for prevention but then let go and let God.



For me I seek the best in everyone; I care not of who they are or where they come from; Generally, do not expect anything but not to be misled in word or deed.    However, I have found over time in this world blessed to be in.





People just seem to be what feed the needs at the time and become something else driven if you will once they successfully get or even when they cannot get what they are chasing.



  Sad but true I have been on the receiving end of others selfish ambitions.   Moreover, no I will never say I too have not been a selfish person and throwing my fits along the way when things do not turn out how I desire.



Yet at no time have I ever before or during my walk with God have I purposely sought to not work for what I desire; or deceive anyone to get there.     I am always me. Take it or leave it; I have nothing to impress anyone but the good Lord above.  



If I am not good enough to where someone has to lie, cheat, steal or anything else to be connected.   Then it should never be.   We reap what we sow; I believe in karma his name is JESUS!



I may rarely get it right in my own mind’s eye or that of God.   Nevertheless, for sure I do my best with what I have to work with.      I am forever out there believing too much in people and always stepping up and stepping in to help or even at times trying to save something.    All the while, I buried myself in a slow death of weighted down deceptions and lack of the boundaries I have taught others that they should always have.





I get it without any doubt.   The walls of scars it has created over the years are abundant and some that seem they will never be removed.     I have faith and hope in the one that has created the same moon and stars that just sit up above us without anything seen to hold them; is the same creator that holds my future and me.





No matter what I reflect to you; no matter what you reflect to me the only one that it will ever matter in the end is God.





Will your deception influence any future with me, why of course! Life is far too short to walk in the darkness forever when I am seeking the light now and for eternity.



If for whatever reason you cannot hold yourself with such respect and allow the contempt roll out like that tsunami wave to everything and everyone you encounter I wish to remain in my own little island and do what I can when I can wherever I can with God at the wheel.



Where does that leave me, some days very alone, yet not without busyness of cleaning up all the lessons that allowed me to find my way here.





Prayerfully I wish the best full of love to everyone and far be it for me to be considered a saint.   I too with my foolish heart have made stupid choices that rippled through the wind with lasting impacts.         It will never stop me from dreaming.



 Where that ends up depends on faith, hope, love and whatever the good Lord allows.     For today, the same God that holds the moon over the earth is the same God who holds the keys to all that I am heart and soul.





So, no matter if it is five seconds or one hundred years, five cents or one hundred thousand there will never be enough time or places to hide for the repayment that washes deceit away.



 Whatever is in the dark eventually will stumble trying to hide the shadow that follows and once Gods good grace and light shines upon it; the redemption will begin be it we want it to or not.



So, for all who are deceived know this; we may feel the guilt and shame for our kindness or belief in those who truly matter. Or even that of what we have caused.  God knows all things and His purpose and our hearts just as He knows all who play in Satan's sandbox in the dark and shine boldly in the light.



Forgive and let go and just live your best life you were given, learning from every step you were derailed.    If the good Lord got you up and you have air in your lungs; there is so much more for you to do.       Guard your hearts, hold your tongue and know the battle has already been won.     If you are a child of God, you already have victory.



Know this; you are loved and valued more than you will ever know;  you need not expect it from anything or anyone on this earth.   If you find a trusting companion that believes in the good Lord and truly walks the walks and does not talk out both sides of their mouth.    Give thanks and praise daily and honor what you have been given.





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:

Isaiah 50:4 (NIV)The Sovereign Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue,

    to know the word that sustains the weary.   He wakens me morning by morning,

    wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed.





Isaiah 55:2-3 (NIV)Why spend money on what is not bread, and your labor on what does not satisfy?   Listen, listen to me, and eat what is good, and you will delight in the richest of fare.

Give ear and come to me; listen, that you may live. I will make an everlasting covenant with you, my faithful love promised to David.



John 19:30 (NIV) 30 When he had received the drink, Jesus said, “It is finished.” With that, he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.



Matthew 27:50-51 (NIV) 50 And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up his spirit.   51 At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook, the rocks split





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September 25, 2019





Verse of the Day:



1 John 2-1 (NIV) My dear children, I write this to you so that you will not sin. But if anybody does sin, we have an advocate with the Father—Jesus Christ, the Righteous One.



Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)









As I am readying this morning to go do service representing my place of employment, I realize how blessed I am.   Thankful for this day and all the other days in wonderment as in silence watching it unfold. 



 Knowing Jesus is not now in charge but has always been in charge.    The Grandmaster with every second of every day; knowing your obedience truth and love all comes from and through Him and is the only way.





As it always has been and will again Father God, he will be the one who is bringing the curtain down.  The game of life finally showing the timing beginning; you realize how each of us are a unique blend of temperament, with gifts and talents.   Yet all do not serve the same values in life or within our souls.   Even you are lost in time for the things you try so hard to prevent or save others from; you find you’re very self-entangled in the misfortunes of caring too much.





Blessed as you no longer ignore, run or hide rather just stand firm as you pull yourself back up.  This time knowing it never was and never will be your place to try and save anyone of this earth again.



For the sting of death of those lost; the pains of brokenness that have torn your heart are all given to the very one who created your being in the first place.



Baby steps or giant leaps; brush off get up; do your best to not be hardened by the pretense of this world.    Focus all your attention on the path ahead forget all others.   If they are worthy the Lord will never put truth that is constant trying to impress others as His desires for you.    Humanly it is so hard not to judge call out or just give up.



However, you know this battle may impede the physical world; it is already in the works spiritually.   For this you know God has already won; it is up to you to just believe and never blowout the candle of hope you hold within.

For now, you run with the day never looking back doing all you can to hold on to all that matters knowing He has got you from before you were born to the end of your stay.     For this you have to believe as there is no other way.



Knowing whatever will be; will be.  For justice of humanity and all the violations or indiscretions; well the decisions are yet to come we just have to wait and see.





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Psalm 23:4 (NIV) 4 Even though I walk through the darkest valley,[aI will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.



Matthew 7:1-2 (NIV) Judging Others




“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.





Proverbs 29:25 (NIV)



25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.



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September 24, 2019





09/24/2019 Cruising with Kelly:



https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2457746680984480/



Verse of the Day:



Hebrews 10:35-36 (NIV) So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Father thank you for allowing me up another day; thank you for the blessings and acknowledgement of what we do, who we do it with, or for and how we do things be it for people, places or things; that it all matters.







In a world full of judgment chasing material everything; we forget so often just, what our own worth is within your eyes.



May we all learn not to be collectors for what is important right at that second but treat all we care about with the love and appreciation that you created us to be and the worth in your eyes that we truly have.



Please be with those who are weary walking with you Father God; please lead us in your will and hear all who are reaching out and lead those walking for you to help others come to find you.



In Jesus Mighty name; thank you for we deserve nothing in this world. Amen





May we do the best you have made us for Jesus  for  “It’s Your Life” https://youtu.be/WuIvs3oc0X8 @ Francesca Battistelli





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Psalms 89:15-16(NIV) 15 Blessed are those who have learned to acclaim you,



    who walk in the light of your presence, Lord. 16 They rejoice in your name all day long;



    they celebrate your righteousness.



Psalms 16:8 (NIV) I keep my eyes always on the Lord.      With him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.



2 Peter 1:2 (NIV) Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord.



Ignoring the deeper questions will never solve the issue; we hold on and become addicted to what we love because of feelings of failure and what happens when that love really was not real.



To know love is to know love from the inside out that never goes away.   We can choose to shut it off, put it away, fill our days and nights with everything to preoccupy the facts.  But when puts the connection within no matter how many times you put the "Picture" away it never removes what is put in the soul https://youtu.be/rKFx0MMqb48@Kid Rock (feat. Sheryl Crow)





The best you can do is remain obedient and know whatever the reason why God allows you to care all I can do is stand here "With Lifted Hands"  https://youtu.be/7drEyGsF-Vo @Ryan Stevenson







It’s all I have left and the only thing that this world or all of anyone could ever take from me.  For even if I lose my limbs, I am yours Father.    No matter who I will never be or who will never be true and reflect physically the love from the inside only you know what it means.





For this I am grateful to know and have.







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September 23, 2019





Verse of the Day:



Romans 5:3-4 (NIV) Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope





Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Thank you for this new day Father God!



As I am so aware and openly admit, I am in way over my head in this life.   That cycle or roller coaster ride where we are cruising along and all is grand then we forget and put our hands out just briefly and like a discarded net into the ocean we find ourselves trapped in that slow almost derailed grind.



Thankfully, I know the fighter in me to keep this moving is you Jesus.  The fighter in me is only you; as I subconsciously crawled up into a ball in that corner over there and refuse to move so long ago.     So tired of doing things on my own; I cannot as anything I had in me without you was taken away so very long ago.



Lack of common sense, or just too hopeful wishing, wanting even perhaps even that dreamer mentality that I was accused of having so many years ago.



Who knows; other than there are three sides to every story it is all in the perspective of things.



There is Love; there is Forgiveness and there is just our Choices.     Perhaps because of the choices, we make; we love and absolutely forgive.       None of it really matters if we do not have you at the core.





All three are like reading your word in the Bible all day every day repeatedly; but never hearing what you are saying.   Never seeing the plan, never making a plan of what do you want us to do.  We never stay and listen fully before we just take off running thinking I got this.



Instead we just wander this earth thinking we understand and manage with the choices we make leaving us wide open for those meek and mild with such beauty and charisma.     Later to find we have put too much of ourselves into believing the humanity side touches every living soul on this earth.       However, there may be no intent of being the sheep in wolves clothing.   The actions and brokenness left behind from all that are pretending to be loyal to you Jesus.    







Wolves in Sheep’s clothing that come a dime a dozen in this world.    You need not go anywhere they find you like a magnet always there in their hours their choosing.







As a parent, a friend, a soul with wanting to see the good in all things and trying to lead by example.    You do your best not to complain or carry on about the misdeeds that can occur in such a harsh universe.     You want the best for all you love and would do anything as you have to allow them growth and stability.







For you know what it is like to feel the impact of falling and when you just do not know if they really are living in Christ or you know they are not the urgency is far greater to protect what is yours not to protect.







You do it out of the deep desire to just be physically loved and needed yourself; while on this earth, while you know the blessing love from the inside out and you pray that for all you connect.







While in the meantime not paying attention to what you are doing, you find yourself hurled into the world of chaos and uncertainty failing to believe God really has this for all he chooses.   While you just want Him to choose what you feel.







The pains and sorrows of this world are real and harsh reality is what it is until it is not.   No matter what good you see in anyone soul there is darkness upon their being of their own choices.   Just as no matter what evil is within those who prey upon the goodness of those out there trying; though they were born with sin in their hearts they never planned to be where they are.







The vicious cycle of good and evil; the battle and war of spiritual and physical carnage ripping through the atmospheres; it is all real.







While you lay in that corner not knowing if you will really get back up this time; wondering how much more as you cry out to the Lord and Savior.   Suddenly you reminded you are “Changed” https://youtu.be/lk1bstD4nY8 @Rascal Flatts



For this, you are forever grateful for ever indebted and thankful for being a chosen one to receive “Your Love Oh Lord” https://youtu.be/QEF7IoQ3eUk @Third Day





The fight within me is all yours Jesus, as I am and always have been way in over my head.   Knowing this nothing else will do.



No matter what it is, my soul cries out or even screams for you Jesus. 



No matter what my foolish misguided heart leads me through. 



Jesus I need abundantly; for as thankful  as I am it will never be enough for the sacrifice of you.





Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:







Psalms 68:19 (NIV) 19 Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior, who daily bears our burdens.



1 John 1:7-9 (NIV) But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all[a] sin.



If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.



1 John 4:18 (NIV) 18 There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.



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September 22, 2019





 Verse of the Day:



Romans 15:7 (NIV) Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.





Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings)



Thank you for this day Father God.    Although I was up and down all night to roll over when I woke to see it was much later than normal.   As I enjoy the coolness of this morning sipping on coffee.  I anticipate the blessings of this day ahead.





As the whispers in my ear to hold on to all the misguided fortunes at the hands of liars, thieves, heartless beings; perhaps watching to many historical shows reflecting even those who pretend to walk closely with you in the church think they can get by with harming innocence.



I see on any given day those who doing for the good and are obedient in suffering and struggling to just get through some days; while others seem to walk so far away from you even when they say they are Christian and fellow believers.    Yet they are out spending more time doing what is wrong and hiding their sins able to get ahead and do nothing really for the kingdom.



I know just as the tiny ghost ants that invade our homes at times during seasons that we cannot see until there are many; the Lord’s Angel Armies for his chosen are with us always.



I know Lord the keeper of this soul; you are in charge; and my uphill climb to not put every 





Soul in the same box is mine and yours alone. 





Though I have seen far too much darkness of this world and many I have been connected.   Your light outshines it all.



We know as it says in “Psalm 63:11 But the king will rejoice in God; all who swear by God will glory in him, while the mouths of liars will be silenced.”



Knowing in this world so many are misled and harmed by the actions of dark hearts; we know in the end where it reads in “Revelation 3:9  I will make those who are of the synagogue of Satan, who claim to be Jews though they are not, but are liars—I will make them come and fall down at your feet and acknowledge that I have loved you.”



So, as the days climbing the mountains in life may I never begrudge or harden my heart over what is around me.    May I know you hold this hand as I climb every step of the way?





All I know as I am reminded in “Matthew 19:11 Jesus replied, “Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given.”



What I can do is continue to purpose daily in prayer and obedience for myself and all I love.  Continued prayers of healing, guidance, salvation and long life for all I connect and for those who have went ahead; prayers their souls were held tightly in your love and promise of eternity.



Although, I may never understand this world I walk in; or what you have waiting for me.   I ask for guidance and protection of my own to lead me Father God to your good works.



Lord as I am alone and empty climbing this mountain with you I pray surrender to you alone.   



You know all things from the depths of this soul.  Please bring justice to all who harm others; please reveal the truth and the way and the redemption and love only you can give or bring.



May I continue to be the vessel you wish me to be; thank you for this day and any that are yet to come.



Daily Devotions and/or Meditation Moments:



Exodus 15:2 (NIV)

“The Lord is my strength and my defense[a]; he has become my salvation.

He is my God, and I will praise him,   my father’s God, and I will exalt him.



2Corinthians 10:5 (NIV)



We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.





Hebrews 10:23 (NIV) 23 Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.

09.Wk3_2019_ September (PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe_AlwaysMeKelly)



 **** Scripture from https://www.biblegateway.com/  unless noted otherwise**** Music links and reference pulled from https://www.youtube.com/ are free for public consumption****


 (Disclosure – I am grammatically incorrect most any day these words flow as a release of this mind maze which gives me my sanity not to impress the critics or English majors (said with much love and respect)

  ==========================================



 Every day you are up - Every day you inhale.  Every day you have something to complain or be ecstatic about.  Every day is a day to be thankful for something; we are all a work in progress.    Every day is an opportunity to write your story! What will yours be?              



=====================================================



Date:  September 21, 2019



Soul Moments @AlwaysMeKelly



The mind’s eye the heartbeat of life beating deep within the soul

Death and resurrection forever or throughout eternity what a rush what a ride

Such passion and love for the Father welling up inside. 

The world can do much over time however it can never take what was given for why Jesus died 



Wishing wanting to have some of it rubbed off on me dreams being wrapped so tight just to really feel the love you are I cannot lie



Oh, my my all that is inside will last now beyond all space and time. 



There are no tears left for this dream of mine. In the beginning so torn why I would acknowledge my senses to life. 



Whispers the secrets line by line 



Don’t ignore as yours are safe in hiding 



Jesus knows everything all the time.  You know this for the soul belongs to Him as this story of yours or mine. 



Riddled with hills and valleys not enough or too much time. 

We in this universe can never control another’s heart soul or purposed vision be it ocean blue or deep green looking into one’s eyes is the story only God allows the soul to see. 



Somehow someday says a Queen to the Sweet Soul King



Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):




Lord as I was up busying around then out without even coffee; I thank you for the blessings of the beautiful ladies and sisters in Christ you surround me with.




These thoughts always playing out do or don’t; even just for a second on this beautiful morning sitting at the intersection listening to the sound of the tires as they cross over one texture of pavement to the next.




The calmness of the air in the lower temperatures yet the beautiful sun and sound taking me back to times that have come to pass of now understanding your beauty and peace.   As I sit listening to the wind chimes and the breeze blow the palms outback while the birds sing.  I imagine the beauty that waits reminded how often the business of life robs us. 





Opening my devotional and the early thoughts I am torn with to just stop releasing these words or finding another way.   Remove myself to what has been a blessing and a curse.  Knowing there is purpose as to why I do have so many thoughts and words; yet so often as of late trying to force this mind to forget all that ever was and find myself somewhere else that matters in you however selfishly for me.




I am then reminded your still voice and spirit are within me.  Just as the peace and love that filled me this morning you are always there.    To embrace all that has come to pass and move forward in full expectations all requests of you will be fulfilled.





So many of my days wasted rushing around doing all that keeps us earthbound tinkering and fixing or trying to make a way forgetting even if things are not what my mind’s eye sees or feels to see.





How often I worry what next as change is coming; change in this home; change in work; change in life like the weather every season has yet to reflect the beauty within.



From the days when I would walk a mile up a snow-covered stream just to see and experience the peace beauty and tranquility; to that of the hearts you have surrounded me with.





My passion and compassion for those of this world scares me yet blesses me with the awareness it is you that allows me to love.



Even if I have over these past couple years thought more about how ready I am to really be in union with one of your designation holding as much if not more love and respect for you than I ever could; in freedom in truth.    Pushing through knowing no matter what choices we make they will never all be right for everyone.  Yet with love, respect and leadership someone that will always be wherever I am even when apart.     You God allowed me to know what love really is from the inside out.




Through the hardships and pain; through the beauty nothing will ever be in vein.    For the abundant blessings that washed down like the rain will someday come again.



Forever is nothing compared to you Lord and eternity and for this I will wait forever.  As am no longer that I use to be; I am still here still me; but saved by grace and the daughter of the most-high King.



Jesus, I pray for healing and leadership of day to day; of this nation and all those out in the world; trying to find their way.     I pray for all who are doing their best and never getting enough rest; for those blessing us with talents, stories, messages of hope.    Please hear their hearts, heal their weary bones, and reconcile their brokenness filling them with your love.  



Restore and direct all as well as myself keeping them from falling and if they do.  May they know you needed to talk to them facedown so you could be truly felt and they know they are blessed and bound!



Thank you, Jesus, for this day guide my every step my every move my every way.   For whatever transpires in my life.   Guide and protect me from whatever Satan continues to through and disrupt leaving my family in disarray.     For who am I?  Even if I feel I on most any day have been played.   I am fully aware of what you have done for me over and over and I know it will not always be this way.



Even if I wait until the future of my next life; I know you bring us through all things with purpose as you have never been a God for pain, and strife.



Give me the strength and motivation to keep going that only you can Jesus.    No matter what; use me for those in need.

Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):





2 Corinthians 13:14 (NIV) May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all.


Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):



1 Kings 19:12 (NKJV) 12 and after the earthquake a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire; and after the fire [a]a still small voice.




Psalms 5:3 (NIV) In the morning, Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly.


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Date:  September 20, 2019



Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



Joel 2:23 (NIV) Be glad, people of Zion, rejoice in the Lord your God, for he has given you the autumn rains because he is faithful. He sends you abundant showers, both autumn and spring rains, as before.


Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):


Proverbs 20:24 (NIV) 24 A person’s steps are directed by the Lord.   How then can anyone understand their own way?


2Corinthians 4:17-18 (NIV) 17 For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18 So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.


Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):



Here I am always trying something different Lord; for the ideas to make it different; better and give need to want to come back for more.



Though I am not here to impress anyone as these words that flow out, just do; I am aware perception is everything in this world we live.    Although it is you Father God that truly matters, I must still be able to live and survive.


Though I may be crazy; perhaps a bit more than some; not as much as others.



It is the day to day that I must get through until the days no longer come and I am finally home.


I do not just say things to say them; sometimes when I am feeling I release in not the right words or way.   As I have not in a very long time and not since walking with you Jesus purposed to do harm towards others with my ways or words.


In fact, it is you that allows so much to flow out of this vessel.   In words or deed Lord, may all that I ever reflect come back to you?  



Please hear all prayers, messages and visions of need; love mercy and grace.   Guide me Jesus as I will never be able to do this on my own.   I grow weary most days as you know everything I am and where I am at.


My best intentions so often fall short; leaving me in the battles of the mind; self-will.   I have never been anything without you nor will I ever be.

Though I crave, desire want and even sometimes weep it is all you allow that I truly must have.

Daily I am so in need of accountability; of direction and love.  You know all things Jesus as you know what I do to purpose daily.

“Spirit Lead Me” https://youtu.be/ABWnLjXer10 @ Michael Ketterer Influence Music



As I fall short of all that is the glory of God and the world daily.  Deep within this being I am yours alone “While I Wait” https://youtu.be/NswPPVgMaPE @Lincoln Brewster 


 I know you God have always blessed me and are everything no matter who gets it or not.  No matter how blessed or let down I become.


Be it I am bouncing off the wall with endless reckless abandonment or in solitude fighting to understand.  The things I have seen; the beauty of souls I have been blessed to acknowledge and all in the grand scheme of this universe. 

You hold it all in your hands God; it is “Your Arms That Hold the Universe” https://youtu.be/H2n3nNSGVj0 @33Miles


I could ramble on and go through my life history of all I have lived.  I could tell that of the day I met you and really started believing and the places you put me to allow me to know I have never been alone.  I could reveal so many answered prayers of my own and those of others.  



I could daily purpose to remind myself it is not about me even when I want and desire so desperately.  Telling the stories of brokenness and the messes that have become promise and messages matter.      It truly is Lord all you call it to be.


I pray for the calling on all I am connected no matter if it is my blood line or all my connections salvation and healing for all who are not there.  Prayers the many but especially those I care for to find “Refuge” in and through you, that which only you can give us Jesus.  https://youtu.be/0LOlkxLcgNA @Finding Favour




It is in these “Extreme Days” we need you to guard us Father https://youtu.be/3EItEuVpJTg @TobyMac



Before it is too late Jesus before we throw life away of our own or that of those we care for; before we are consumed by that which does not matter.  Before we are all “Gone” https://youtu.be/cNqhZ9N3EQw @TobyMac    May every soul find a way to meet you and know the choices only they can make.  Because of this I believe in “Everything” you are Jesus https://youtu.be/kgj7wIMsdZU @Lincoln Brewster


Thank you for the blessings for no rhymes or reasons could ever justify.  Thank you for this day!  For no matter what every comes to be to or for this vessel “It Is Well With My Soul” https://youtu.be/mmQS-GZ962c @Tory Kelly     Thank you Jesus!




==============================================


Date:  September 19, 2019


Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



Ephesians 4:29 (NIV)
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.




Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):


Dear Lord, forgive me as I forget who I belong to when tired and frustrated or even hurt at the actions or lack of. How quickly I let things flow from these lips.    Continue to teach me what it means to stay silent if nothing nice can come out; or the proper way to address those things that should not just be ignored. 


Father God may it be your will that leads me through the paths of righteousness and not my stubborn quick reacting defense mechanisms of reaction.


I have always been one to just jump in, help, and have done my best so I thought to appreciate wherever that takes me.    Yet even years later; I take the sting of rejection, the sting of deception and even that of watching others fall apart as such a personal loss.  When it is not about me even if!


Jesus, I react towards others ready to shut down fight or just try to make those who make me feel small less than what feel.   May your will; your words always prevail.     There is much to credit at times to the terms of “see no evil, speak no evil and hear no evil”.  However, in the world we live that is impossible.  

Father God teach me what you would do.





Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):



Ephesians 2:6 (NIV) And God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms in Christ Jesus,







Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):


Thank you, Jesus, there will never be anything I can do or say in efforts of proving how blessed and grateful I am for the life you have given me.   I will always fall short remembering it is you who is sits with the Father.     Just as the song sings out Lord “Fear Is A Liar” https://youtu.be/e5LNfj2F5qI @Zack Williams    May we all come to know the difference while allowed to walk through this life journey and always turn to you Jesus in all things.



Teach us how to see you in “Everything” https://youtu.be/XOlGap4wOxc @TobyMac   For it is never as easy as the world sometimes makes it seem.  


Psalm 27:8 (NIV) My heart says of you, “Seek his face!”  Your face, Lord, I will seek.



Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):

Whatever transpires, no matter what the battle; may we always remember this war that is fully ongoing trying to steal our mind, spirit and soul that this war has already been won in and with you Jesus have a place for all who believe; Lord break the chains and fill us with your peace God!




Romans 8:6(NIV) The mind governed by the flesh is death, but the mind governed by the Spirit is life and peace.

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):



Elohim found somewhere over 2500-2700 times in the Bible; Jesus Lord of the beginning and the end; of all creation.   He who is infinite in all things; power, strength and faithfulness.


The battles of the mind and how or what we do with all that flows through the maze as we are filled with so many things churning daily.   Purposing 24/7 is necessary to walk with you Father God.   However, how long or what will it take; for me to really get a grasp of who is in charge of this world. 



  Sure, there is a battle of the spirits and the mind, which Satan is right there so close where we are walking that line of all that is good and pure as he is sneaking in reasons to disrupt all that we are in harmony in peace love mercy and grace.   Filling us with doubt, fear stealing the joy from our souls when we let it.     Reminded this morning how important it really is that I not let the weariness overwhelm me.     


We must hold tightly to you Jesus; I pray you fill me up guarding and protecting me from all things that are false and really are there for their own selfish deeds.


Sometimes we just become empty; even losing feelings of the spirit who lives within us.    Lord may we spend as much time finding you; holding you and purposing for you as much as we listen to all the nonsensical noise that will always be on any given day.


Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):



1 John 2:15-17(NIV) On Not Loving the World



15 Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, love for the Father[a] is not in them. 16 For everything in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—comes not from the Father but from the world. 17 The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.



Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):



Lord fully aware how temporal everything in this world truly is; still I fall short a thousand times a day.    So often with a glimpse of what it could be like to have all that you are in the flesh; I put thoughts that should be all on you out there as a contributor to things not so different from any other in this world.    


 Too much work, too much social media, too much of all that will quickly come to passing.  


Guide me Jesus please to be more a reflection of you.   Not just walking in obedience there is far more than just sustaining purity.   Far more than serving; show me father the how, when and where.


As I could go on and on any given day where I can just keep letting everything in this mind maze to spill out.    I can tell you there is much.  However, I pray for refocus as I take my breaks this afternoon and revisit my manuscript until I get completely through it.   Lord it is not just about telling stories; or adding more ups, downs; misdeeds or blessings.    It is about the choices we make or do not make, along with what we do with everything you allow us to journey. 


Asking for words that will come first in November as I fulfill the testimony in the park along with wherever else you take me.   


Dedication, Loyalty, Loved to a Fault (@AlwaysMeKelly)



When I told you my secrets you became part of my wall

 I cannot deny even if I fall

For I have never been blessed to have you physically connect with me

Life is funny that way so why can’t I dream

In my heart in my soul

No matter what seems crazy in a world besides what most put on really is fake anyway just a show



But what is in the depths of this soul what comes through the airways God truly knows

I need just more than that glimpse in time Gods not yours not mine

Nothing this long; this unspoken; this I can never deny



Would ever be anything less than demands from His Heart His perfect design

It does not matter if you will never know

It does not matter that it’s been 20 years or so

I am a bride of Christ by soul and virtues all are aligned

But hey I never had the choice to pick or make my life

In the beginning I learned how to fight and just survive



So, on that day I finally found Jesus and He really showed me life without strife

I fell deep into more than anything that could be just liked

Then you came along; or was it me at a concert when I heard that calling that song

Thanking God that very moment he was feeding me truth and growing my spirit

I could not get enough even now I am blessed in love from the inside out

I could not ever explain why; don’t want to maybe it keeps me from dealing on my own with any plight



I just know there is far more to this world no matter how far we travel by bus, boat, car or flight

So, get this maybe my head is not right; maybe all the damage of my youth and misfortune even when I once was someone’s bride.   I have been saved and for many years a bride of Christ





One thing is for sure; God has shown me the light; and I am forever His child in love with what I can’t explain what I don’t care to hide

I will belong to you until the day I die; and then I will see you on the other side.

It does not matter where you came from; where you been, who you are or what you said



Just promise me you know; and will never give up, quit; get caught up or forget

You are not what you do or where you been

For God loves us all but you must admit

To him alone and ask forgiveness, strength and courage;  Love yourself do not be boxed in



By the world’s views; they keep blinders on for only they want you to view

You will never be what they see on the outside; it is who God is in you; do not let them trap you in the lies you are only what you have done or do



No one gets it; I can’t even, so why try I am forever in love with a dream because the world well it’s been filled with so many lies



Nothing dark not bleak just an agape love bound that often makes my soul leak

God has given me a glimpse what is next I do not know

Forever is a long time when there is nowhere to go

So, I guess I will just keep this mind maze active and let the words flow



My loyalty to God, for all the steps he directs me out of where I have been and where I am going is still in his hands and very unknown



I am in love with Gods promise and all of what is above; even if you were to break me I would never let what I love go; I can never give up or give in



Life is what it is; until it’s not and this is all I have all I got



My dreams and the love from the inside out my unexplainable peace my unexplainable dreams like it or not



===============================================================


Date:  September 18, 2019

09/18/2019 Cruising with Kelly: 

https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2446215242137624/


Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



Philippians 2:3-4 (NIV)
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.


Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):


Thank you for this day and all the abilities you have blessed me with  today along with all the opportunities that await every second I am allowed to exist in the here and now.

Thank you for the sense of humor as I write so early and come back to revisit after a while; some things Lord are just too funny and jumbled in my words and life.     The little simple things that can make one smile make a difference.


Thank you, for the clarity in freedom to choose no matter what is going on with any of the battles more importantly, the strength we sometimes never realize we even have while fighting to not give in or give up.    We may not know what we have but we manage to make it if we do not give up.

Thank you, for the power of will and freedom of choices we are allowed.   As we acknowledge ownership and accountability, we may not always do the right thing in what we need to do next.   However, we know giving up and quitting is never an option no matter what does or does not make sense.

It is a blessing for me to know it is not what this world can give but what we can give the world can truly make or take lives. 

I am the last one to know what a result will be on any given day also I can be the first to tell you despite any effort on any given day; it is not anything I can possibly be doing that sees me through with even a sliver of sanity.



I just know from life experiences things will always happen that do not go according to what I think should have happened; or even along the path of any unspoken plans.

 Sure, I can plan it out writing them down; checking them twice, align everything, pray like crazy; work even harder.      Nevertheless, it is the good Lord who is the ultimate keeper of what will be that sees me through any given day.

I guess that is my problem some days when I feel let down where many times even though I do not purpose to put expectations on anything or anyone.   Subconsciously I really do.

Thinking I have that right to have that win where everything goes according to my plans on any given day.

I have been humbled and humiliated more times in this walk than I can count; I am blessed to have the wins of actually learning most times and the growth I have been able to work through in abundance.

 

Many times, I openly admit my purposed expectations are not t realized until something good happens and I am ecstatic or something goes horribly wrong and I just want to crawl up in a corner.  

It is then on those days that the layers of either / or just weigh me down leaving me to really struggle and push my way through until I am able to put it behind me.

Maybe that feeling of being on my own little island most days and not surrounded by likeminded believers has something to do with it; maybe it is just how I am from this life’s entire journey.    I do not think it really matters at this stage at least not for me.     However, if there is any words of encouragement; experience I can share that will help the next generation so be it!

You see when we finally meet Jesus getting to that part knowing our blessings; well it is a beautiful thing.  To know we can choose to make a difference how we react to any given person, place or thing at any time.

Kind of crazy in a sense; like me sleeping soundly the night before waking up the next day feeling melancholy.   Hardly sleeping last night waking super tired yet feeling good.  Go figure right!  Simple analogies most days seem to work best.    I just know change happens, change is good and change needs to be if we want to grow and filled with peace.

We must be reliable, we must have ethics, we must say what we mean or mean what we say if we want to really matter in this world to anyone.     Really, what do you have if you no longer have trust in any relationship? 

For me I have to put my trust in the Bible and all it stands for and in our God who created all things, and in Jesus Christ who made it possible for me being here.    

No matter what changes come, what is or is not, what someone did or did not do as long as we are able to get back up and able to talk about it we are blessed.

 Knowing all that is happening in this world, all the devastations and loss of life from the storms and elements of life.  With the so many that are taking their last breath or losing everything.

We still have the ability to choose how or what we will do next.   I can only pray we all do what we can to make the time we are given count and not just for ourselves.   For those we meet along the journey as well.

Prayers that we dare to know who we really are for what God created us for; not for what we allow the world to mold us into.   Do not get stuck molded in a box because your best intentions dreams and desires landed you in places you never thought you could step out of and still make a difference.

Be the real you and share your blessings to help others grow.   Big or small, it all matters.

My words are small and make no difference for many; but they matter to me and my sanity and they matter to you Jesus.   You know my heart and the depths of this soul. 

Father God thank you for all you have allowed me to see, do and be.  Good, bad or indifferent and there has been much on this roller coaster of life.    Now that I have been blessed to meet you Jesus; may I remain in your presence and guided by your will always.  May I never lose hope in life and humanity and may I dare to make a difference someway, somehow every step of the way.   Thank you, Father God, for healing me through this process; thank you for allowing me to feel your love.




Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):

Matthew 6:33 (NIV)
33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.

John 8:29 (NIV)
29 The one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone, for I always do what pleases him.”

Colossians 3:23-24 (NIV)
23 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, 24 since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.




=======================================



Date:  September 17, 2019

Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



Ephesians 5:1 (NIV)
Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children 

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):



Good morning and thank you Jesus for this day.   Although I did not want to get up out of bed, I just rather feel no motivation today.   Not tired just not really my normal energetic self.    Oh I slept soundly as far as I know; I do not remember getting up even once during the night this time; unlike my up and down routine.





I am fine I know this; just feeling melancholy; sure, I know I could justify many reasons but really have none.   We all have stuff that we are going through.  Me I am blessed even back as far as I can remember.   When I was fighting to survive through fighting to help, others survive.







I could not figure things out the why or how I have this feeling today; but it hit me when I was driving in and the song “Rescue” came on and @Lauren Daigle and I found myself just weeping like I had lost my best friend all over again.   https://youtu.be/gYR0xP1j4PY

Perhaps it is the closure that will come this weekend as we finally after so long have a celebration of life on Sunday; perhaps it is the fact of the great relief that I felt when I heard her husband is cancer free again and he will be able to heal and move on with life.





Perhaps it was just the first time I have heard that song and felt this overwhelming selfish pity of when will it be my turn and when is it my turn  that I will be rescued?   All the while through my younger years fighting my way through to give my children the life I never had; fighting to belong; fighting to be loved finally coming to terms and walking only with you Jesus.   





For years, doing well without a skip in this heartbeat; then these past couple years everything started changing again.       Here I found myself awake and out of the desert and willing to help, do or be whatever it takes for those I care for and believe in.     I had been there before but never while bound with you Jesus.  





Believing everything will work out getting way ahead of myself.  Knowing I cannot predict the future for myself, nor do I want to.   Yet here I am so steadfast doing whatever I could to help those that do not see the way do manage for themselves.




Seeing so much misfortune of this world, it does not matter for me; if whatever I can do blesses those to move forward in you; with you and know their own worth.




2019 is moving fast and furious; there has been so much to be thankful for; yet so much lost and misfortune for many I am connected and even within my own home.





I have grown weary this year; I know I have said and done things that were not pleasing to you Lord.   Trying to manage my plans even in prayer and petition all the way through at times.  





Yet in the end, I still see no change and feel left out in desolation wondering why do I do the things I do?   What starts out as wanting the best for all I care and love; and hope to be a positive seed planted.  



After my overwhelming feelings of the rescue song and what I believe to be that moment of self-pity; I was reminded Lord how “Your Love Defends Mehttps://youtu.be/jwpsDJOyl0o @Matt Maher  




You remind me you Father God are a gracious and forgiving God who will never let your children down or go.  Even when we lose sight of who we really are in you.



Your love is what carries me Jesus; so as you expose more of me that is still so broken and vulnerable; as I realize this overwhelming feeling of this day; was because I finally went back into my past and started revisiting and editing the manuscript that you have never let me lock away or throw away.




Humbling and humiliating yet so very real in a world or people you really grow to love and believe in; that prove really are not so much!





This too shall pass with you Father God; this I know.   Just as I know, I have no clue what will be in the future only that you are with me every step of the way.      My prayers of guidance; and your will alone Father God!   Not my own because I am too weary and weak to continue to be that rescue ranger, I have been all my life.   Even if I thrive and grow by helping others.    I can no longer afford the sadness of loss; or the burdens I take on. 



However, how easy it would be if I was independently wealthy and lock myself away never caring about anyone in need.    That is not your will Father; even for my own; your plans are greater than mine could ever be.   Be with me in the days to come as I walk through and ready this story.    Open many scars and find the right words that have truly led me to you and blessed me with life only you have given.




Be with all I love and care for; all who have lost the battle because they waited too late when they changed, or it was just their time to go on ahead.  Be with all are seeking you and have not yet found your truth.



Thank you for this day no matter what feelings transpire, for every breath given is a blessing from you alone. Filled with great love and promise of a future in and for you Jesus.


Guide my stubborn independent ways and me; protect my remaining days allowing me to see through your eyes Jesus feeling with your heart and loving with all I am.


Thank you for all you give me; as I was opening up my documents to continue revisiting and writing you reminded me what really matters in this life.  



Forever My Sweet Soul King (@AlwaysMeKelly)


 When God calls repeatedly and there is no way to ignore what he is putting within you; just do it!     Listen and respond to that stranger in need or someone who has sat next to you for years.    Believe in those you find beautiful; give all you are in obedience with and for God’s purpose.


I will be the first one to tell you it may never make sense and logic is nowhere in sight.    I learned much in life not always Godly or good; but what I have learned with the beauty of the sweetest soul I will ever hear from is the abundant blessings of experiencing love from the inside out.    No matter if, I ever experience this love physically with a being in front of me loving me as I would them, as God would allow such unconditional Agape raw love.  


 To know and feel a love of what only God can give is to love and be-loved from the inside out.  Do not question who he chooses that connects through the depths of your soul.    I have made myself crazy trying to understand what has transpired in this life.    Just never, stop praying daily for all that is to come and praise all that is yet to be.


  One thing I can only assure you my life has never been the same since I openly acknowledge my needs for something greater than this world can give; the day I met Jesus. 



Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):

1 Peter 5:6-7 (NIV) Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Proverbs 16:9 (NIV)
In their heart’s humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.

Psalm 37:5 (NIV) Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this:



Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):


Late night thoughts before sleep




I am far from perfect, but I try for my family and those who are in need.  I do not have to know you to step up.  In fact, in most cases I prefer not to, that way there will never be any heartbreak or love loss when you find the need to lie to me.   



Just that wall of protection that I have used to guard all of who I am for years.



However, every now and again I open up and am amazed of life that flows through my veins clearly from the good Lord above.


You see I let people down daily, as they do me.

Hurt oh yea!    It rips me apart when people hide behind masks or lie to me.   I use to think it was something wrong with me.    Then   God made me realize I expect too much.  No one is me who clearly when I do open up; believe the good in everything and am excessively transparent well you get the point.


 The thing is I always forgive even if I without even trying put new walls up.



 I never want to stop loving and hoping for the best in people; as I truly begged Father God long back to let me feel with His heart. Along with seeing with His eyes.

  Truth is; I know I could never withstand the pains he felt or must feel daily from even a sliver of what he keeps from me in protection.   



 So once, you have crossed that bridge, it is on you.  If you find the need hiding who you really are; if you find the need to lie and mislead me; breaking confidence, it is not on me.  The loss will sting for sure; especially for what the Good Lord allows.  However, I am me; always as I was; always as I have been always who I can be.   Always me!    Your queen; your friend; your confidant; your sister; your wife; your mother; your daughter; your business partner; your lead; your backup.



The everything and nothing all in one that you have let go; that would have helped and loved you regardless.


From a distance, forever and it will never matter where you are, who you are, or what you are supposed to be.   The Pope; the superstar the least of these.    Love has no boundaries.    Even if the world puts contracts and bindings to everything.


  In the world labels mean everything; in Christ we are everything.


I cannot withhold the depths of my soul; only God knows what is really meant by what is there.   It is deep; it is real; it is beyond eternity.


For now, I am too young to roll over and too old to waste time.  I cannot change what is not been given to be shared as mine.


Not a day goes by I do not reflect; if you are in my soul, He let you in to be not me. 

Because well life and me we got history and I try to avoid people I do not already know.   Because it has taking me so very long to forget the scars that put the walls up that I do not care to show.

No, harm no foul.  Life is too short to live with negative anything.


 So, when you decide to cast judgment.  Look in the mirror first and pray God has mercy on you before you think you are qualified to take matters in your own hands towards someone else.



If life is not working for you change it!  You only get one journey and people places and things are a dime a dozen.  Truth, purity and keeping it real with moral values and loyalty is priceless and the price Jesus already paid if only we live in obedience with him and each other.


Love people for where they are.  Enjoy them when they share their blessings but do not take advantage of anything or anyone.  I believe in karma and his name is Jesus.    Much love and peace you always know how to find me.   

====================================================




Date:  September 16, 2019

Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



James 3:13 (NIV)
[Two Kinds of Wisdom] Who is wise and understanding among you? Let them show it by their good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom.
 

Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):
7:07 pm  Thank you Lord for the awareness of your healing power and many answered prayers for a broken family who has suffered tremendous loss and pain these past 3 years. You have blessed them with healing and promise.  Thank you.



630am



Thank you, Father God, for each new day; no matter what words swirl in this mind maze I am forever grateful for all you are, for and/or with me.   As I am nothing without all you allow me to be.   Even on those days, I do not move forward in full potential with all the doubts or unknown sadness and lack of faith in why things occur.



No matter what wakes me to get out, no matter what time day or night.   I am nothing without you.        I have forever had this love hate relationship with myself and thankfully, over time you daily allow me to come to know who I am and who I am to be.   With or without the validity of any physical affirmation of those in this world.


Heartbreaking to know as a parent how badly I pray my child could know his or her own worth no matter what is or was.    Yet we all must experience our own journey our own interlude with darkness.    Prayerfully we deal with the demons through you and not allow them to consume and ruin any chance of who we are really to be.

Sometimes darkness pays the visit repeatedly ambushing good intentions, kindness and deep hope in love; like so many times before while I constantly am fighting the balance to remove and take images of failure away.  

Memories flash like the lightning bolts striking a metal rod with the giant shock and brilliance and such clarity.  Lighting up the reflections of all of those beautiful souls who have played the game of life and giving up in torment as if they can justify the torture they inflict on the unaware.   All the while, they are lacking the courage and strength so much they cannot see and save themselves

So instead of dealing with your own reflection you constantly willingly step up and step in to help save what you have no clue what you are getting into.

You stay in there trying to save them for what they do not say; all the while, you say it for them yet the great reprieve of what you offer is too good for them to reflect their own truths.   

You seek fulfillment of that that deep need to just be needed more over to belong and feel that love never experienced by anything in the flesh.

Knowing if it were truly real there would be more than words; great reciprocation of them really wanting to be a part of all you offer; yet words are all there is.

  No matter what the truth you know be it in the darkness or light nothing is happenstance and the same God who is the God of Abraham blesses us all.   For all who believe and learn walking in His word greater things will prevail.   No matter what is or is not during this parallel universe between flesh and spirit. 


Some dreams repeat themselves and sneak out periodically then things with people and places come to life, even in the briefest second of Gods timing or understanding.  Only to have it ripped away leaving you to doubt why humanity in the first place.


For all is too great to know or even make those connections understand how long, how true how real a love so great really is meant to be.   Forever is immeasurable even if you feel time has reached its end.

 
Digging deep within the faith you have come to live to hold on and not let go.   “You’re Gonna Be Okay” https://youtu.be/LjF9IqvXDjY @Bethel Music (Brian & Jenn Johnson) 

For no matter what version, what remake, what color, and what size; no matter what they have or what they are doing; no matter what has not been done or what is yet to come God will never be a part of what brings harm or brokenness in your walk through this world.      He can stop and change anything he wishes; however, our own strong will; pride and misguided game we play within this world.   Be it we acknowledge and willingly play the pawns, rook or even the kings and queens.    The God of Abraham will never leave while no others have never showed up.

Which makes it surreal to know there are some things in the depths of my own soul that have been for a very long time and will forever be throughout God’s eternity.   For only He knows when that is.

For what I know is; I would do it over again knowing if I am blessed as much then as I am now.  For God of all creation knows all things even when I do not and He has never failed me.

For my heart may have been broken to think, so much of time and life and how it meant so much to be learn over time nothing was truth related; it was all a lie.     Whilst I knew in advance, yet I still foolishly wanted to believe and just could not get past just once let something be real.

It is then Jesus reminded me nothing is ever wasted.  For the wisdom and strength of the heart lives forever. 

That which is bound with or by God is blessed beyond all horizons.  With new opportunities and new life beyond all human reasoning and sensibilities

Reconciliation of truth is the beauty that prayerfully flows through the veins with that great rush as your favorite ride coming to the ultimate climax of anticipation and the relief planning His will has never stopped but will soon start again.

It should never be about who is right or wrong.  It is about maintaining the love of God unblemished in willful obedience laying down egos in acceptance of submission to serve in the kingdom finding new life every moment we exhale.

Sometimes that truth cuts deeper than any knife that takes a life.    As we try to imagine it is all about us.   We know God is love and the love he places us within our minds, our souls no matter what does or does not happen.  It is greater than anything we can fathom that could never be explained or replaced.  

We can let our ego’s anger show throwing fits and hurting what is hurting us for our lack of understandings.    Nevertheless, for the God of all creation did not come to this world to be a temporary pleasure or quick fix.    

The flesh may grow old; weary prove to not be what other beings of this world no longer want or are interested that once were promised forever.     As what is, material becomes more important than what will ever be worthy and eternal.      We will learn to get through be it with hatefulness or digging deep and knowing nothing in this world is just happenstance. 

So despite any brokenness at the hands of others or that of self-infliction.    Let the King of Kings Lord of Lords and maker of all the heavens and earth hold you tightly and dig deep knowing no matter what flesh does or does not rub up on you.     His Love is “Forever” https://youtu.be/huFra1mnIVE @Kari Jobe    

For me there may be an emptiness for all I believed that was not strong enough to dare to be truth.   There may be moments of interludes with what becomes the darkness.

For me I will forever be in love and crave that love in the flesh beyond all space and time.  knowing that if not on this side of the universe someday we will “See The Light” https://youtu.be/h3msQ1xv59k @TobyMac

Knowing that Jesus is all who sustains me then, now and forever and that will be enough if it must be.

Even when I experience the world and “Hard Love” https://youtu.be/0VcMTnaI4Ic @NeedToBreathe I will always be the child of God who needs Him more than anything or anyone this world can pretend to be; give or take from me.

My prayers are that my children never experience anything so painful that they lose themselves and the worth they truly are just being them.    That they never put their value in what the world thinks or does for them.   Or how it treats them.   For they as all children are created for so much more.

Praise and Thanks to you Lord for this day; and these words.   Be with all my connections and watch over protecting all I love.


May we get past all that holds us back; we know things will never be the way we think they ought to be; at least not until Jesus comes back.    We live in a world that is selfish; dark and hard.   We can still be that light of hope shining even the smallest glimmer knowing everything we walk through is meant for good. 



  Even when we cannot see or feel it.  Just keep pushing through in and with Christ; we cannot do this on our own nor can we run and hide.   For me all that I am pushing through is because of you God!  Not my own will; as I so often want to quit or just run as far away.   However, it does not matter how far we run or where.   Until we deal with all that ails us it will haunt us over and over until we either give in to God or are destroyed by the world and our own choices.

Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):




Mark 8:36 (NIV)

36 What good is it for someone to gain the whole world yet forfeit their soul?

Psalm 139:13-16 (NIV)

13 For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.



14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.    15 My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place,



    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.  16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

2 Corinthians 3:17-18 (NIV)

17 Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. 18 And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate[a] the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.



=====================================================

Date:  September 15, 2019

Verse of the Day (Biblegateway.com):



1 John 4:16 (NIV) And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in them.



Meditation Moment Opportunities (Biblegateway.com):




John 15:13 (NIV)


13 Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.



Zephaniah 3:17 (NIV)



17 The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves.



He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.”



Numbers 6:25-26 (NIV)



25 the Lord make his face shine on you and be gracious to you; 26 the Lord turn his face toward you and give you peace.”’




Daily Journal/Thoughts/ Prayers (my perspectives and/or feelings):





Thank you, Jesus, for this new day!

Please consider sending your army of angels to all in need today Lord; big or small needs do not matter; please be with them so they know you are real!




Lord my prayers are that you will be with all those going through it; as I was reading last night and my mind triggered in remembrance that the greatest manipulations and being taken advantage of Lord comes from those you come to love and trust.    



You trust in them to be the upright persons they portray; you trust in them to say what they mean and mean what they say; you trust that what you see on the outside is really the beauty they truly are within.



Knowing for me anyway; how much you tolerate or let go is out of our own selfish plans.   Be it we really have a need or want to keep them around or even a speck of thought in our own minds eye truly depends on the betrayal and our own self-worth.      



  Even with close friends and/or family there will be times that someone or something has let us down.    Worse yet there will be those times that they truly let themselves down and you see so much more within them that they just cannot see for themselves.   



You cannot save them from the demons and choices they run with no matter how much you give or try to be there.

What over time I unfortunately have learned is you can look past the self-pity or self-gratification when you see the choices they make or even the pain reflected that they have made and cannot shake.   Pains layered up of broken trust you start carrying because you believe the good in everyone.

Anyone who really knows me knows I have been blessed and cursed to be a strong person and for many years now blessed beyond all blessings to be strong women in faith in you God.

I may feel the sting of helping those in this world game and seeing me in the end as the losing opponent even though I am not the direct player. 

I can be just the extra pieces to help keep them moving through; that wishes and wants so much more for them.




However, in the end I need not be worried being tied up to losing.  As there are many players in the game of life and I personally won the day I came up out of that water.   So, the sting is brief and I had died to myself and purpose to do so daily.


  The world can love me or hate me it’s up to the opponent that sucks me in.   Material things are replaceable a dime a dozen just as the players of life’s game.



You see I can look past self-pity or self-gratifications as only God is the judge.    I can look past every mistake made for I am far from perfect and fail daily, but it takes more than I am sorry to look past disrespect; hatefulness or even purposely hurting others. 



    Unfortunately, once one does such things; no matter what pity I start feeling for you; you become meaningless and just another abstract view that is blocking the beauty that waits.



So on this morning Jesus as I am getting ready to go walk out the door for worship give me your eyes to see; your guidance and direction for all those that will touch my life some more  as above  others truly beautiful.  May I not get caught up in anything but to love them as you would.




I know my words will change after I am filled up; but for this mind dump; I need to release it all back to you and be freed in you as you have done so many times daily. 



Weekend Services:  @New Life Christian Church 09/15/2019

https://www.facebook.com/alwaysJustmeKelly/videos/2441168859308929/



Thank you, Lord, for the freedom we have in our country to openly worship or even just do crazy things.    So many countries are governed with punishment of death or long term prison sentences for some of the simple things we take for granted.



Thank you for the blessings we are allowed to openly worship and for all who have dedicated their lives to bringing souls to the throne through music.

Thank you for all the hearts that volunteer week over week to the churches to shine the light and be hope for neighborhoods and souls that desperately seek a better way.   Please guide and protect us all who are your faithful children and doing for the kingdom and not for selfish ambitions.



Life is hard and how easy the best of the best can be consumed and misstep; guide and protect all Father God.      Please bring them to you and the awareness of who they are in this world and who they are in you.  


  Including myself Jesus; please forgive me for my offenses and sins.  Be it words or deeds.  No matter how well you truly know the depths of my soul; it gives me no right to not be quick to hear and slow to speak and control my tongue no matter who offends me.


Even if my pain points are valid; even if my words are brief and quick; forgive me for anyone I have released my hurt or anger at because of anything that is going on.


Life is what it is; we may dream all day long and be angry when we take a few steps in what we think is the direction we should go to make things happen; or we can just be in such a state that we want to believe everything and everyone until we can.  



 If that is how we manage our choices so be it; however, when things do not move according to any plan hidden in the back of the mind’s eye no matter how much prayer; signs or anything.      We need to give it all back to you Lord no matter how many ways or how many times.



No matter for the praise or to help get through the pain and tears.    The world is harsh no doubt about it; ready to chew us up and spit us out any second of any day.   But you Lord God have carried me this far and have never failed me; and no where do I believe you ever will.    Thank you!




Nowhere is it ever written to be paralyzed and shut down if we do not succeed with dreams or goals.    However, we need to do everything in and through you and your time.  For this I give all I am; all I have and those you have blessed me with. 



 Show me Father the direction you wish me to go; give me strength courage and wisdom to maintain and move forward my own personal being; anyone you wish me to be connected and all you have blessed me with.


Thank you for this day as I ask for healing all that is broken or in need for all I am connected; please start giving me the words for the November testimony I have been asked to give.    You know I can tell my story all day long Jesus; however, the world is cruel protect my family when I open the gates of how I have been blessed by you throughout my life. 



Ending this thought with “What Ifhttps://youtu.be/ZbVYIZ4nkX8 @Blanca



Sunday 5-11-2025_PrayersThoughts_PiecesofMe (AlwaysMeKelly)

  ***Music, and/or daily scripture, verses, motivational shares pulled from public domains and made available for public consumption from pu...